How can I start going back to church? (Mormon)?

Question

After going threw really bad choices (drugs, sex, etc.) from ages of 16-18 I became inactive. I am now 21 and I am trying to emotionally gear myself to going back and becoming active again.

I believe in the church with all of my heart and I know the gospel is true. I am just having a really hard time giving up worldly things, like drinking, etc. I know the Lord will forgive me of my wrongful choices and welcome me back to the fold. I know this! I just can't understand it.

My Husband (who isn't a member but is will to go to church) and I have a 19 month old daughter and I can't get passed the idea that she isn't learning the gospel.

What can I do to help reconvert myself? I know the obvious... like read your scriptures and pray. We have also had the missionaries over often. I have and yes it has helped but I am still not where I should be.

I have really bad social anxiety and that is another piece in the puzzle. Thanks for your help. And please, no Mormon bashing.

I respect everyone's beliefs and if you have found something that is working for you then I have no right to judge you.

I hope that you would do the same. =)

*sighs* You are not answering my questions. I didn't ask anything about parenting my child. I believe in the church. So what? If you have a different opinion thats great but don't bash me for what I believe by sitting behind a computer screen. Give me a break.

Forget it... We are obviously not going to have any solution. *shakes head* I can't get over how judgemental some people are, no matter what their belief system is.

Answer 1

I love the story told in Conference a few times back. A couple went to sacrament meeting and found themselves sitting behind a lady who obviously had a Word of Wisdom problem because she stank of cigarette smoke. The wife wrinkled her nose and commented on the smell to her husband. Her husband replied "Aren't we lucky our sins don't smell?"

In other words, no one is perfect. Just go back, and work on the details a bit at a time. Repentance is not an easy process, but you've started so you might as well finish. And just think - when your daughter is a young adult and you tell her about the importance of living the law of chastity, word of wisdom, etc, your words will carry extra weight because you will really know how much grief you would have been spared had you listened.

Answer 2

First, we are all sinners so do not worry about your past decisions. The purpose of the church is to help us all to prepare our selves to come unto Christ.

Going back to church starts with just that, going back. I invite you go back this coming Sunday. You have to start sometime, it might as well be this one.

Once you are at church, schedule an appointment with your bishop and begin or continue the repentance process. This is the most important thing that you can do, because you will find some of the spiritual guidance that you seek as you prepare to eventually partake of the sacrament again and become fully active in the Gospel.

Even though you may not feel like you are in the position to do so, I would suggest sharing the gospel and your testimony with others. As you do so, you will feel your own spirituality grow. Invite your friends, family to listen to the discussions in your home. Missionary work has always been such an effective way for me to feel that fire again.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Well I would and did just grit my teeth and start going. However if you think it would help try this just go to sacrament meeting the first time or two. You know just test the water a little. As for your bad habits don't worry about them just yet just concentrate on first getting back to church. Take the sacrament if you feel like it or pass it on with out partaking of it which ever you feel comfortable with, God will let you know which to do when it is time, rest assured of that it would as far as I can see be OK either way. If you take it, after all you are trying, going to church proves that. If you don't it is no big deal as you may just not yet feel like you are ready. But first go and you will find after two or three times you are very much welcome. Remember most of us attending have done as bad as you have or in some cases a lot more. In fact in my ward right now is someone that went to jail for similar problems a few years ago, and he is in the Bishopric right now. So remember you are not alone, far from it. Think of it as a hospital for sinners not a gathering of saints. For the perfect people have no need to attend church. Good luck and God bless.

Answer 4

On Saturdaynight lay out your clothes and prepare items you will need for your child.
On Sunday morning rise early, jump in the car and go.
While you are there make an appointment to speak with your BP or Bishop, which ever the case may be, and tell him exactly what you have just posted here. If you are not yet prepared to do or say anything else for the moment, let him know. He will be understanding.
Make an appoinment to see the President of Relief Society and tell her what you have posted here. Arrange for visiting teachers from Relief Society. Take one step at a time.
It is just a case of going. And organization on your part to be prepared every Sunday morning will relieve your anxiety. Not a single person there is perfect. Remember what you have done. Forgive yourself. And hop in your car.
And NO I am a Pagan not a Mormon.

Answer 5

I am a Christian (not Mormon Christian) and when I find myself outside of the community, I remember that God is a Trinity. God's love would be incomplete if The Trinity did not have each other to share the love with. We are to be a reflection of God, and so we must share God's love with each other. Apart from the community, it is impossible to love one another as we are not a part of the community. Like you said, God will accept you back into his fold, and so will his Church. So take it one step at a time and just go back for a service. I'm sure the Church will be delighted to have you back and in turn, you'll find that you've found what was missing in your life as well. As for reconverting yourself, we as Christians know that we are never perfect, and are always in need of change towards God's way. So don't think that you were astray from the flock through your years of wandering in worldly acts. Simply know that we are all vulnerable to the sins of the flesh and be glad that God will accept you back as you are now just on the promise that you'll follow him as best you can.

Answer 6

Call your local ward and find out who is the Relief Society President. Ask your some of your questions woman to woman. Request a sensitive visiting teacher. Maybe a older sister to be a 'grammy' in the family. She can buffer you from situations you aren't prepared for. Establish these contacts to give yourself a support network.

Bring the Gospel into your home a little at a time. Start Family Home Evening on Mondays. Find out about social gatherings. We have a monthly picnic in the park, and 4th of July pancake breakfast. You can talk with people in very informal setting.

Answer 7

I think the big key is getting involved. Go to church, request good home and visiting teachers. Go to ward activities, invite other LDS families over for dinner or Family Home Evening. Maybe even ask for a calling. Since you have a 19 month old daughter, nursery would be a good place for you and your husband.

It is very difficult to get rid of bad habits. It's been my experience that it is easiest by replacing them with good habits. When I served a mission we taught a stop smoking program that had 15 steps that if followed never failed. Most were to suppress or replace the urge to smoke.

Answer 8

A lot of 'mormon' kids rebel in a completely opposite but characteristic way from what they were taught. I would bet that you've not been taught any other doctrine except mormonism, so have no idea what is available to you, or even what to expect.

If the concept of eternal families sounds good to you, and you like the companionship the church offers, simply return to the meetings. You should be welcomed, but I would advise against relating your history. It does no good in the long run, and certain people like to claim moral superiority over others. You certainly don't need to subject yourself to that.

The best of luck to you and your young family.

Answer 9

I am glad to hear that you are willing to go back to church. You can't do anything to convert yourself. That is the role of God the Holy Ghost to do that.
The only concern that I have is that the church you are talking about is run by a false prophet. (Not a bash - just the truth!)
When you say that you are not where you should be, you are right. Go to a Baptist or Alliance church near you and see about fitting in with them. They will likely be a support to you in what you need. Social anxiety is a concern. The churches I think of for you are small and you won't be overwhelmed with crowds.

Answer 10

Talk to your bishop, and ask him if you can have a referal to LDS Family Services. They have resources to help you kick your bad habits. Hopefully, there is one close to where you live.

I will pray for you. You owe it to yourself to try to get as much help as you can. Please call your bishop/branch president and ask him about that referral.

Have you considered such groups as Alcoholics Anonymous or Narcotics Anonymous? That might be another way to go.

I hope this helped just a little at least.