My husbands friend is totally hott. He flirts with me and when we went to the store he grabbed me and placed a deep passionate kiss on my lips and asked me to leave my husband and come to him. I know that he is a good man and that he would treat me so much better than my husband but I do love my husband.
I am so torn. I have really got to know this guy over the past 2 years and he has grown on me. I am not a slut or anything. I do not want to wreck a friendship or marriage. My husband and I have become very successfull together and I do honestly love him even though he is not very nice verbally to me. What do I do??? Help please.
2007-07-01 17:24:20 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
"I know that he is a good man". Is that really what you said? A "good man" wouldn't kiss his friends wife and ask her to leave her husband for him. You don't want to wreck a friendship or a marriage? If you don't want to wreck a marriage, stay away from this other guy. You don't have to worry about wrecking a friendship. This guy is not now, nor has he ever been your husband's friend.
2007-07-01 17:32:55 · answer #1 · answered by ncgirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't like how this so called friend of your husbands is taking advantage of his wife you in this case. Some friend he is to your husband. If he really cared for you as a friend he would know that you love your husband and not try to hurt his best friend and you in the process for his own gain. Sure this guy can sound great now he's free as a bird he doesnt' deal with you every day nor the kids or house or bills so yeah he looks like prince charming now. But your husband which you do love you say and still today might feel a bit old hat or a comfortable shoe but he's more loyal than this other guy coming on to you now. I 'd stick with the husband. I don't like the guy who is supposedly a friend of your hubby's coming on to you like that.
You should also distance your self from this man as he is so hot and you may be tempted. or it could happen one day you get into a big fight with hubby and the sleazy guy is there to pick up the pieces and come on to you when your vunerable and hurt and he's just what you need at a time like that. so your better off to distant yourself from him if you know you can't control yourself around him. we can all make mistakes in the heat of the moment. and why ruin your good marriage to the man you love for a fight one night.
You say you know he's a good man. yeah maybe with you cause you got something he wants. but is he a good man to your husband after all he's sneaking around your husband back planting kisses on you and telling you to leave him. to me thats not a good man.
You probably see some things in this other man you wish your husband had or acted towards you.. remember this guy is free to play and act all nicey nice. fast forward all the years you have had with your present hubby and I bet some of those nice things you admire now would be gone from him too. Since you love your husband and thats great news to hear. I would work on perhaps letting your hubby no your missing some things like saying your not very verbally nice can we work on that the both of us. cause honey this new guy thats sneaking around behind your husband back isn't so nice if he's willing to do this behind your husbands back and again there suppose to be friends.
Dont get caught up in the new relationship thing at first all things look rosy. remember what you have with your husband.
Now if you were miserable and mistreated and you were wantting to leave the husband that may be different but thats not what your telling us here.
2007-07-01 21:00:43 · answer #2 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi! why not try to be frank and tell your man everything???? I mean, you call him a friend of your man? If you are a loving wife, why don`t you tell your man that this fuc..ng ash..e, is trying to check you up? bMaybe your man would get some more respect for you. All this lying is like poison for a realationship. First of, tell your man that you don`t wanna be talked to like he does, secondly, tell him everything that bothers you, it is so easy to forget how lucky one is, everyone can need to be reminded from time to time. Most guys love their woman you know, but most men are also very slow on the love thing, and have problems to tell what they realy mean. If they get a warning though, most men will wake up and fight for their woman. If everyone do like you do, and not talk to their men, most men would not understand what was going on before it is to late, give them a chance at least. And a question at the end of my answer to you. Why, why and why should he not do the same to you as he is doing to your man? Do you think a man with no moral what so ever will make you happy? well then for how long? until the next younger and sexier woman comes along? Stop and use your heart and brain please? If not, go to that cheater and vampire that he is, but don`t ever come and say I did not try to warn you!!! Don`t do it, and tell your man. Be a wife and do the right thing. If not you are nothing but what you said you were not. Think girl!!! don`t let a giggolo talk you away from a good life. good luck, peace and love from Norway
2007-07-01 17:43:37 · answer #3 · answered by thefallen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your husband had a friend, it wouldn't be that guy you went to the store with! If your husband is verbally abusive to you, get some counseling, or just break it off. It is not fair to your husband when you continue to see his "friend" socially. How would you feel if the shoe were on the other foot? Sucks, huh? I believe that total honesty is the foundation of any relationship that is worth having. If you can't talk to your husband about your feelings, honestly, and give him time to work it out or not with you, he will be hurt terribly to find out about you and the "friend". Personally, I wouldn't have a relationship with someone that I took from a friend. In relationships, like yours, you need to be best friends with your mate. What kind of person treats a friend like that?
2007-07-01 17:41:25 · answer #4 · answered by gitargal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are thinking about this says you truly aren't committed to your husband, most likely because of the emotional hurt you experience from his verbal abuse. It also sounds like the reason why you stay with your husband is because of the financial security/success.
Marriage requires complete fidelity. If it doesn't exist then there is trouble brewing. If your marriage is important to you then the friend has got to go...NOW!
Lastly, you need to let your husband know that you don't appreciate his verbal abuse and that it distances you from him. There is no easy answer to solving this problem, but if it is not fixed it doesn't sound like your marriage is going to last much longer.
2007-07-01 18:36:08 · answer #5 · answered by DBM_MBA 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you have to ask your self do you feel good about lying and cheating? have you considered how hot your hubby use to be and have you worked to maintain a strong relationship, or are you just interested in your own selfish interest, and to heck with who you will hurt.
How can you say you "LOVE" him if your willing to have an Affair with your husbands friend. talk about a heart breaker.
Hope god Blesses you with common sense, and a bit of wisdom before you make a BIG mistake.
Read these books them might help you out.
Especially WOMEN POWER
2007-07-01 17:29:25 · answer #6 · answered by Sully 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
good man i think not what friend would do this hon he is a player and you are the married toy he.s laying with ever hear of a simple word.[adultry]. look it up in a bible called. the.10. commandennts. or ask a lawer anout it he give you advise . if you loved your husband you would never let him touch you fact. in my opion?
2007-07-01 17:51:22 · answer #7 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Verbal abuse is still abuse, though running into the arms of another is not a very good idea. Remember the grass is always greener. . .
2007-07-01 17:31:26 · answer #8 · answered by Emmah 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you honestly love your husband then there should be no question what to do.
2007-07-01 17:29:27 · answer #9 · answered by anonymous 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋