We are married and have 2 kids. He's thinking about being a barback/bartender and I do not feel comfortable with this. I mean I'm at home with the kids while he goes out and sees women all dressed up for the club, serving them drinks. I guess I just get scared b/c my parents are divorced, mom cheated on dad, then while still married dad dated another woman, divorced my mom and they got married. Should I be concerned or should I be comfortable....if comfortable how can I be?!
2007-07-01 07:49:06 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He is looking at a job, to support his wife and children. You are worried that he is going to see women who are all dressed up on the job? Let me give you a hint, he is going to see women on any job he works!
If you are so insecure in your marriage that you worry about him while he is working, you have a problem. If he was going to cheat, he would cheat. If he is faithful, he will be faithful!
If you try to control him, he may agree, but he will always resent you! A resentful spouse is much more likely to cheat than a happy one.
You make the call!!
2007-07-01 08:01:48 · answer #1 · answered by fire4511 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your husband wants to cheat, he can cheat no matter what job he is doing. If your marriage is strong and you trust your husband than you should have no problem with him going out to make some money for the family in this manner. I can understand your frustration though, since you came from a broken home where your parents cheated on each other. That does not make your husband a cheater. Just trust him and know he is doing this job for you and your kids.
2007-07-01 09:31:29 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I honestly don't know what to tell you. I was working as a bartender when my husband and I got married. A month into the marriage he asked me to quit. He said he trusted me but could not stand the thought of all the guys hitting on me all the time. I quit. I didn't really want to, because I made really good money, but I did because I thought my marriage was more important than the job. I guess it depends on how much you really trust your husband. If it truly makes you uncomfortable, tell him. Do not pretend that it is no big deal if it is a big deal to you!
2007-07-01 14:05:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well if you are so insecure with this arrangement then why don't YOU get out and get a job to help your husband support his family?
If you were so "uncomfortable" why did you get married in the first place knowing that your mother had cheated on your father first? Wouldn't getting married yourself pose some sort of problem for you considering you could follow in your mother's footsteps?
Who are you worried about your husband or yourself?
2007-07-01 09:03:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
you are so right to feel uncomfortable i don't think thats a job for a marry man with kids, it's not like theres no more jobs left...i would feel really uncomfortable if my hubby wanted to work there and personally would not let him but thats just me even if you have a good relationship build up men are men and he will be looking and women are scandalous they'll try to talk to him and flirt too....don't let him work there it's only going to bring problems to ur relationship...GOOD LUCK
2007-07-01 07:57:10 · answer #5 · answered by hey 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
be concerned. kid in a candy store. women love bartenders. tell him to get him a gig at jewels or dominicks bagging groceries or something
2007-07-01 07:53:13 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Two kids and married!...Why would you want to work in a bar? I think that sums up his personality.
2007-07-01 07:59:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Ah....I would not like this...although I would imagine he could make some $ this way. You should be asking yourself can you trust him? If you can't suggest he get a different job.
2007-07-01 07:57:03 · answer #8 · answered by i_b_winkn_at_u 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'd be uncomfortable with it.
2007-07-01 07:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by biiiiaaach 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋