i have started planning my suicide to co-inside with my birthday this year (about a month away).. it seems everything in my life is always a mess and always causes me a lot of pain... i have many regrets in my life.. but what has caused me to want to end it for real this time (i have tried many times).. is that i think my hubby might be cheating on me with a 19? yr old girl he works with, (he is 39).. i read some of his txt messages to her, even asking when her birthday was cause he had found something special for her.. it breaks my heart when i read these.. her birthday is only 3 days after mine.. he never talks to me the way he talks to this girl.. he just told me then that he was going over to a friends house, when i went out the front i found an item (table) missing, and he told me a few days ago that this girl wanted it.. so i can assume he has gone off to her house!? he recently went to the river with work mates and decided to stay the night there with them, and she was there!
2007-06-30 19:25:57 · 23 answers · asked by Dirinda 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
it isnt' just about him.. my whole life has been filled with pain, from being sexually abused, to being kicked out of home, i feel no one loves me anymore.. i am worthless.. i have borderline personality disorder, i have spent the last 20mths in and out of psych wards.. and i am still the same messed up person.. i even have a psychiatrist who i see, that i dont' think i want to go and see anymore.. just can't do it.. my life has been one painful memory after the next.. seriously! and i thought my marriage was perfect, and now that too is fading.. i feel there is nothing left!
2007-06-30 20:04:16 · update #1
Don't let one stupid prick ruin your chance at happiness. Speak to him, and if you arn't satisfied with his answers, leave him. No man is worth committing suicide over. Maybe seeing a councellor would help you.
2007-06-30 19:32:43 · answer #1 · answered by Sublime 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You know I have been as low as you feel several times. Here lately as well,. but I promise you suicide is not the answer. You have the chance to live a happy life. Use that chance. Get help. It takes alot of courage but you will be so glad you did. I am seeing a counselor now. It helps so much to realize you are not the only one that feels the way you do. My counselor knows exactly how my brain works with the depression and can tell me what im thinking before I open my mouth. It is amazing but that proves to me that I am not the only one out there feeling this way. I want and deserve to be happy and so do you. Everyone does. Dont let him get you down. Tell him that you know. Let him go if you have to but always remember what you are working towards: happiness in your life. If he doesnt make you happy any more then he is not the one you should be with. I do wish you the best of luck. Please seek help from someone. I was at the hospital with my sister when she attempted suicide and it was devastating to me. That was when I knew I couldnt do it for fear that someone may be devastated in the same way as I was that she wanted to end her life soo badly.
2007-07-01 02:43:15 · answer #2 · answered by pedsnurse 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've obviously had a tough gig.
I hope you won't end it by killing yourself.
A lot of people here have offered their views, suggestions, sympathy, in the only ways they know how to possibly help you make the other choice.
These are strangers, but they're doing the best they can. If strangers are so moved by what you've said, imagine how those who know you and care about you will feel if you do this thing.
No, that's not sufficient reason to continue living a life you believe is hell.
The only reason to continue living is the recognition, the hope, that you have the power and the wisdom to make it enough better in the future to make you glad you're alive.
I'd offer the observation that, while in the depths of despair you aren't qualified to judge whether there's grounds for hope.
People have suggested you give it time. They're right. You're in no rush. If you kill yourself you'll be dead a long time.
2007-07-01 12:46:46 · answer #3 · answered by Jack P 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't commit suicide,he's not worth it.I would recommend confronting him with it.See what he says.Sometimes when cheating spouses are confronted like that,they do confess and even sometimes stop having the affair.If you still love him after all of this;let him know that too.Look him square in the eye and make him listen to what he has put you through.Don't be afraid to let him see your pain.The pain HE has caused you.When everything is said and done,if he should not want to continue with the marriage,please don't end your life.In time you will find someone else;someone who will treat you the way you deserve.And until you find that person,just breathe and take solice in knowing you not the only one out there.I pray you find peace and comfort no matter how things go with him.May God bless you and hold you in the palm of his hand.
With loving Christian Blessings
Yours in Jesus Christ,
~Helen
2007-07-01 02:49:30 · answer #4 · answered by helen f 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Three days after you are dead they celebrate her birthday. Is that what you really pictured? If you think by killing yourself you make him feel guilty and sad,you are wrong. He might feel pity for you for one second or two and then this is his life that continues and your body starts to decay in the coffin.
STAND UP on your feet. Have some self confidence. Be someone. Respect yourself and go on with your life. If you do not see the problems that other people struggle with, It does not mean that they don't have any. Life by itself means courage, struggle, coping, and more. A comfortable, easy life does not exist.
And now about him: In my culture we have a phrase that says: "die for someone that at least catches a fever for you".
If you give any chance for your relationship with him, talk to him and get help from counselor, otherwise forget him. You definitely deserve better.
2007-07-01 03:05:59 · answer #5 · answered by learner 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't off yourself, Dirinda. Your philandering husband couldn't possibly worth it. There's something else, though, that I want you to consider: you've let out a cry for help. You're overwhelmed by betrayal, something that will make you crazy.
Absolutely, people will be saddened by your demise. But these feelings of sadness will soon be replaced with anger and contempt, because you didn't "stick it out with them." You'll be seen as a "quitter" by more than a few.
In time, their feelings of anger are released and you and your suicide are in fact forgotten, just another memory of that vast trash heap of humanity. If you're lucky, there may be a faded photograph of you in somebody's scrapbook, but the circle of people who would have to react to your suicide would soon forget you, as the living cavort only with the living in the real world.
What if your husband isn't remorseful? In fact, you'd be providing him with the perfect excuse to hook up with the 19 year-old vampire: through no fault of his own, he'd be a widower.
Nothing is going to change your husband. You have to change in order to accept the fact that he's a jerk. Get some counseling, as he's ruined your sense of identity and self-esteem. It's going to be very difficult for you before it gets better.
It's your choice: a life worth living or a suicide, Surely you're not going to let the human equivalent of a cockroach deprive you of that vast gift of life.
Remember, Dirinda, there are people in this world who would be thrilled to have your problems.
2007-07-01 02:48:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If what you say is true, your husband is not worth sacrificing your life over. Don't do something which cannot be rectified! If your marriage cannot be salvaged through counseling, then end it and find somebody new. There are plenty of men out there who are seeking companionship and love from a good woman. You just have to look for them. Seek professional advice first, and then, with guidance, decide how to proceed from there.
2007-07-01 02:41:23 · answer #7 · answered by MathBioMajor 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your life seems wrapped up in pain with no way out.
Dying is a very final solution to what is most often a temporary issue.
Our despair, our anger, our hopelessness often leads to thoughts of self annhilation, but is that what you really want?
Your husband sounds like a thoughtless, sex driven *** who is going through a mid life crisis.
I feel badly for you in your despair and I understand how you feel. But do you want to loose your life simply because you have lost what would seem to be your current reason for being?
We have to live for ourselves to be able to foster a relationship with another. Our happiness should come from inside ourselves rather than from another.
Something better for you could be around the corner.
2007-07-01 02:34:58 · answer #8 · answered by tigsgal1 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Suicide does not solve things. Life is so worth living. If your husband has a cell phone call him and tell him either he comes home now or his clothes will be on the curb when he does come home and then follow through with this. Find a suicide hotline and call them right away. You have a life and deserve better but it is up to you to make the first step to a better life. Suicide is not the answer.
2007-07-01 02:31:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me what you should do is change the locks on the doors, throw his junk on the lawn and tell him he'll be hearing from your lawyer. then what you should do is take a nice new bath, put on a sex dress, call up your gals and hit the town! YOU should NOT be ending your life because some jack hole can't keep it in his pants. and from experience, those who are really going to kill themselves dont tell anyone in advance- this seems like a call for help and we here on Yahoo are here to help! you arent alone! you dont have to be a victim. be strong- you dont know how tough you really are. i dont believe the universe gives us things we cant handle. i know that sometimes you dont always see the light at the end of the road but it IS there. you can move past this to have a really great life you just need to KNOW that you deserve better and are willing to take what you want!! if he wants to be with this girl fine! he'll just cheat on her- how can you trust a man who cheats with you? seriously! take a stand for yourself cause in this life, no one else is going to.
best of luck. there is something great out there for you i know it! you just have to be willing to find it.
2007-07-01 02:40:37 · answer #10 · answered by orange blossom honey 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
*gives a giant hug*
I need some of those every so often. Don't commit suicide. Life's a b****. I'm not going to lie, I've never been through anything as terrible as you described but give living more time and things will get better.
Life's all choices, and you can choose to die or live but i hope you don't die. ; D
2007-07-01 14:56:53 · answer #11 · answered by Sheeenaxoxox 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋