my bf of 6 months has shown me just how scary his drinking is, he always does a "you dont love me, i hate you, i love you to death etc" tantrums when he drinks which is alot, he is drunk probably 5 days a week. sometimes hes cool and calm then goes to bed but lately he has been getting pretty rowdy....he hit me once but it was more like a "light ***** slap" lol it know it sounds funny but kinda freaked me out. so im wondering if anyone could give advice on how to let him know what he needs to do to fix this before it goes too far.
2007-06-30 16:07:41 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hmmm,,,
mayBe you caN sHoot hiM with youR hanDycaM wheN he GetS dRunk,,
aDD soMe dRamaTic muSic on tHat,,
wHen youR bF caLm dowN and cooL...
SHOW IT
SHOW YOUR VIDEO
TO YOUR BF
absolutely...
giVe it tittLe... "wHen you geT dRunk"
teLL him hoW peopLe sCareD beCaus oF his Habit,,
teLL him How yOu feeL,,
do it caLm, witH patieNt
don'T aDD emoTion
jusT do it witH love love love love....
GooD luCk!!!
^_^
2007-06-30 16:17:27 · answer #1 · answered by pheebii 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to this site http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/. You need to get help for yourself as alcoholism affects the people that love the alcoholic. Do not make excuses for him, fix the things that he messes up while drunk, call in sick for him or buy him alcohol.
You can tell him his behavior is unacceptable and makes you uncomfortable. And go about your business. If he has slapped you and it made you uncomfortable you MUST protect yourself. He is escalating his behavior and it will get worse if he does not choose to get help.
Talk to him- when he is sober! He may laugh it off or deny there is an issue. The alcoholic is usually the last to know there is a problem.
This is a disease without a cure- but treatment is available. There are recovery programs (look up AA) treatment facilities and counselling to help but he has to want to get better.
You can get literature from AA and just leave it on the table where he will see it.
I will leave you with the words to my favorite prayer:
The Serenity Prayer
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
2007-06-30 16:24:24 · answer #2 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide just how MUCH you actually LOVE him and if you are willing to accept that he may begin hitting you more and more as time goes by---they HIT ONCE, they are bound to hit again..... he obviously doesn't think he has a problem with drinking and they RARELY do until they hit BOTTOM---and sometimes, hitting bottom means HITTING THE ONE YOU LOVE to a point that you PHYSICALLY HURT THAT PERSON... Do you want that for YOURSELF? Maybe you can shake him up a bit by sitting him down and telling him that you will not sit around and watch him destroy HIMSELF and YOUR relationship and that if he doesn't make a CONCERTED EFFORT to quit NOW, you will leave.... and, if he decides he won't quit, then you might NEED to be prepared to LEAVE HIM....alcoholics who do NOT realize they ARE alcoholics are DANGEROUS to the people around them....AND themselves.
2007-06-30 16:22:05 · answer #3 · answered by LittleBarb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
before it gets to far. i think it has gone past that already. if a person is not ready to understand that there is a problem there is nothing you can do to help. first a drinker must accept that he has a problem. then and only then will he be able to begin to deal with it. you have a long hard road ahead. i wish you strength and wisdom in this.
2007-06-30 16:17:43 · answer #4 · answered by 1oldone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should dump him and tell him you did cause you couldn't take his drinking. People often have to hit rock bottom before they come to terms with their drinking problems. When you stand by him, you are, in a way, supporting his drinking.
2007-06-30 16:12:51 · answer #5 · answered by Yancy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has to change and realize that he has a problem. Ultimately, you can do nothing to make such a person see that there is a problem. If you respect yourself, why are you allowing yourself to be in a "scary" situation.
2007-06-30 16:12:42 · answer #6 · answered by Zombie Birdhouse 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hit the road Now..
2007-06-30 16:10:33 · answer #7 · answered by Grand pa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By telling him your CLEAR expectations of him in order for him to stay with you. If you don't want him drinking and feel it is problem, he needs to get help for instance to stay with you. If he doesn't, then is he even worth it? Is he worth having you in his life?
2007-06-30 16:12:19 · answer #8 · answered by St.Jeb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that ur getting scared of him drinking and that it may cause a breakup maybe that will get him to stop
2007-06-30 16:11:46 · answer #9 · answered by eldude 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just have to come out and say it. he might not like it, but you have to do it and you hvae to be serious and make sure he realizes that he has a problem.
2007-06-30 16:12:04 · answer #10 · answered by 14bert14 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋