Is this rude?

Question

I was at my neighborhood pool today sitting with my husband and having a smoke. a lady came up and said, "excuse me, we reserved this area for a birthday party and I was hoping you would have the courtesy not to smoke here when the children arrive. I was sitting 50 feet from their "area" which was just a bunch of empty tables. I told her, "we'll be leaving in about 5 minutes" and she said , "ok, good."

Don't you think that was rude? I mean wait and see what happens when the guests arrive. I'm sure if there were a bunch of kids and the smoke was blowing on them I would've moved away!

Answer 1

I'm not a smoker and yes ...you were outside and there before she was.

It would be like telling her that you are in the process of enjoying your cigarette and was wondering if she would have the courtesy not to breath on you?

Answer 2

I wouldnt take it personally...I'm sure she wanted to check before she forgot theres proabably a million things she had to fiunish doing and honsestly I would have probably said soemthing... if the wind was shifting it in the direction...If I PAID to have a party for my kids I wouldnt want to have to smell someone elses ciggarette smoI would have worded it diffterently. ALthough you might find it rude I probably would have said...."Hi i'm sorry to bother you ... but as I was rushing around to set up the last minute details I noticed the wind was blowing your smoke right to the tables....I was wondering if, when the children are here, you wouldnt mind standing down wind? Some of them are sensitive to this and i'm not quite prepared for a full on asthma attack from them>

Answer 3

I think it's rude to smoke in any public area, inside or outside. I don't think she was rude...kids were coming and she didn't know how long you were staying until you said so and maybe she wanted to make sure the situation was resolved before anyone came. BTW...50 feet isn't that far away.

Answer 4

Well im the kind of person who doesn't like smokers one bit and hate that habit, however, you was there first, outside and the kids wasn't even there yet so yeah, she was a stuck up ***** who should of asked you not to smoke if you was actually blowing it in peoples faces and spreading your cancerous smoke everywhere deliberately, she should of waited for the kids to get there first before asking you.

Answer 5

it's a mixed bag
at my neighborhood pool you cant smoke-you have to leave the pool fence to smoke
pro's she was rude-as smoking is allowed-yet if the areas are sectored out-and her sector was not in your sector she apart from concern of the children seeing you smoke-if you look nice it may be a problem, yet

she was diplomatic about it asking when the children arrive

and I was hoping you would have the courtesy

so over all I would say she wasnt rude-just rather asertive and if not in her venue agressive in her feelings

I suggest forgiving her-so it doesnt urk you-this helped me to learn to forgive others and try and maintain peace=this is how I as a Jew came to know Jesus personally

"Unto us a child is born, a son is given, and he will be the mighty God, and the prince of peace." Isaiah 9:6

the answer is still in the salvation of the soul-till then we are on the outside looking in. Revelation 22 "Do not add to my word or take from it or you will receieve plagues, and never find salvation.

this is how I got salvation-believing the Word of God="I love you, and ask you to repent of your sins (even one lie) quickly. Behold I stand at your heart door and knock if you hear my words and ask me in, I will come in and be your friend." Revelation 1:1=Jesus words spoken from heaven & 3:19&20

so i prayed "Jesus I am sorry for my sins, come into my heart and help me, be my friend, amen."

Now Jesus is my Messiah, Bright and morning star, best friend, and savior, he comforts and keeps me, and His word has become the love letter of my life in Spirit and in truth.

Praying the best for you too and I also smoke too and dont smoke in the house and dislike second hand smoke, David

Answer 6

I think I would have waited until the children arrived and then if you were blowing smoke at them, politely ask you if you would mind not smoking near them.

Answer 7

Yup, was rude. The kids weren't there yet, and you were outside, (unless it was an indoor pool, which would be another story altogether.) So, the smoke wasn't going to linger.
I am assuming you weren't going to leave a bunch of cigarette butts around the place.
The world is changing its mind about smoking now, and soon you won't be able to smke anywhere.

Answer 8

"Ah, I'm so sorry madam, that isn't going to happen - but if you would extend me the courtesy of not having the kids makeing a racket and getting under my feet, that would be greatly appreciated - shall we say keep them at least 20 feet away - and then they won't be able to smell the smoke either - so we both win.

Mark

Answer 9

im a non-smoker and i think smoking literally stinks. but if its outside i don't see the big deal, i mean smokers are addicted to a drug, and its not easy to quit, and probably 95% of them would quit if they could. i've never asked anyone to stop smoking, even when they sit beside me to eat and it ruins my lunch.

Answer 10

Not really. It depends on her tone. Not everyone would have moved when the kids got there. She was just putting in her request to make sure. Also she was probably stressed with all the party planning since she made her request when no one was there.