My 25 yr old BF just moved over 1,000 miles to be with me, left his family, friends and job. I know, that was a lot to give up and he must love me if he did that. I do love him, and initially was really excited that he was here. He has now been here for two weeks and has barely looked for a job. He gets on the internet, looks at a few random jobs and shortly thereafter, gives up, then goes to the couch and goes to sleep. It's the middle of the day! Also, recently I've noticed certain habits of his that drive me nuts - like poor dental hygiene - he only brushes his teeth like once a day - they actually get brown crap in between them and it grosses me out a bit. He weighs 300lbs (which I don't mind as much, as long as he at least makes some effort to eat healthy), and his typical breakfast is a mountain dew and nutty bars. I don't mean to sound like a Bch but these things are causing me to feel less and less attracted to him. How should I deal with this? Thank you for your answer
2007-06-30 09:07:02 · 20 answers · asked by Elle 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I woul appreciate a lot of answers!!! THANK YOU!
2007-06-30 10:18:20 · update #1
do what i did to my husband. when he would be lazy i went on strike and didnt do anything either. its suppose to be working together and if only one is working then its not going to work. so just be honest with him......GO ON STRIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-06-30 09:15:48 · answer #1 · answered by $martA$$.com 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him in a nice way, that things are not as you expected, he needs to get motivated, tell him personel hygiene is VERY important to you and he is becoming lazy in that department, ask if its becasue he is depressed, the reassure him and tell him to just try harder, You need some help.
maybe he thinks you are so desperate for a guy that you will just let him live there freely. make it clear that that is a NO. he will either have to 'get up' or move back home. firmly tell him "vacation" is over! If not get used to him living off you.
when it came to bed time, Say ,shower time and the tooth paste is lying on the sink or wherever, Some guys are just clueless. If his mouth is nasty, DONT KISS him!!
2007-07-08 14:00:10 · answer #2 · answered by butterfly7 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh you poor poor dear......you took this guy in and he does this to you? dont feel guilty he traveled that far im sure he was more than happy to do so and now hes taking advantage of you first off i know its hard to tell someone they are grossing you out so start casually like if something comes up about teeth or toothpaste just say" ewwww it grosses me out when people dont brush their teeth after every meal"...job wise* .....buy less and less food and make sure he realizes that his extra income would surely help and only have sex with him when he brushes his teeth and showers this way he will associate the cleanliness with sex and clean more often...you do not need harsh words at all just actions!
2007-07-08 02:58:27 · answer #3 · answered by Lacey S 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You really have a tough situation here. You are going to have to sit down with him and tell him like it is, or be prepared to put up with him the way he is. Don't give him any options except work and clean up, or find someone else. You seem like a nice person, but for you to have to live with a lazy overweight bum is not good for you or your future. Good luck and keep smiling.
2007-07-08 15:43:17 · answer #4 · answered by Ken D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there, you don't sound like a bch, he is now every comfortable and he knows you would feel guilty to breakup with him especially because the moved for you.
tell him to check out this new company that just launched
www.liveearnwisely.com. and if the likes what he sees, thats a job that he can do.
2007-07-08 16:08:51 · answer #5 · answered by rishg 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've dated a couple lazy slobs, and they never change. Love them just the way they are, because they won't change.
Perhaps he also just needs more motivation. Is he depressed and not showing it? Sometimes depression will drain a person's ambition.
2007-07-08 14:51:24 · answer #6 · answered by Cool Tapes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
buy him some clothes that are about 10 sizes to big, when he says what up with this, just tell him at the rate he's going they will fit in a week
2007-07-07 19:36:33 · answer #7 · answered by shane f 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems to be no other way than telling him about your feelings now. May be he can tell why he behaves as you tell. If so, he has to change. If not; break out of it.
2007-07-08 12:23:05 · answer #8 · answered by baltus 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump him quick. He's worthless. Your youth is too precious to waste on a leach.
2007-07-08 14:43:09 · answer #9 · answered by Abdul Jones 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its hard to be out of work. when you are out of work you tend to let yourself go. you get depressed. and you get unmotivated. that is because its hard to find a good job out there. its very frustrating to look for work and not be able to find anything good. give him time. once he gets a good job he will snap out of this.
2007-06-30 16:22:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him your going to come live with me until he get a job and buy you a house!!!
2007-06-30 16:45:47 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋