Not answering my calls?

Question

I have been with this guy for almost 2 years. We were even engaged. Now he's left me to be with his ex, (she left him for another guy before). So far of what she says he's happy there because she has own apartment and a dog. I am only 19 years old and she is too much she has so much more than I do. I guess thats why he loves her for what she has.

She gave me her cell number to call him and has no problem with me talking to him. He has ignored my phone calls, and when she told him I left messages for him, he said, "whatever".

This is painful for me for one he was all i loved and ever wanted. Now he's gone, and seems like he doesn't even want to talk to me. Why? What did i do wrong? Is this is way of "letting go?"

Usually when he says, "whatever" that means he's avoiding the problem. He does that when somethings upsetting him he just locks everything in. Guys have a problem with expressing emtion i know. But not answering my phone calls is just plain rude. Because being with someone for 2 years and then not even answering a phone call? He called before he left, before he was moving out of state, but I was at work, If he wanted to talk to me then....why not now?
The reason i believe he left was because of his living situation at his moms, she wasn't exactly "rich" he was staying with her at her house which was a trailer. He couldn't take living like that anymore so I believe his ex (living in another state) was his only escape out of his hell hole!
Before I ended up getting the rest of my things from him. Even though he knew he was leaving with her, he tryed to BEG me back. Why?! And was telling me how much he loved me!

Answer 1

There is only one answer I have for this!
Don`t waste your time chasing the shadow of a man!
When we love our partner and he decides to leave us for another, we all have the great hope inside, that he miight miss us, still love us, and come back!
Wrong, that will not happen! I know its hard if you realy love a guy to get the simple truth in to your head!
The truth is, if he would love you, he wouldn`t have left....full stop!
And his Ex.........
She probably enjoys seeing you chase her man!
Try to leave him behind.....
you are only 19 years old, when i was 19 i saw the whole love thing through pink glasses(all lovely and rosy)

I also chased a man, and it was the wrong thing to do!
I wasted 8 years of my life to a man that obviously didn`t love me back, how stupid i was......................

At the moment I am in a relationship with a man that realy loves me the way i need to be loved, and i am also madly in love with him!
I wish i wouldn`t have wasted time!

Your true love will enter your life unexpectedly, believe me!
Mine came to my door to do a plumbing job in my house! lol!

I know its hard, but you have to face the facts here!

Answer 2

There really are no words noble enough to comfort you, The pain is intense at first depending on how much you yourself put into the relationship . All I can say is next time, and there will be a next time , guard your feelings . I won't harp on your age, but it does matter as you are not hardened to the bitter disappointments in life that only come with the years and a few knocks we get along the way . Eventually someone will come along that is worthy of you who will return your feelings.Don't run after him , There is nothing deader than dead love . It will only make you look like a pitiful creature . You don't need that . If he only thinks of the advantages he gets from her then he is not worthy of you .
You did nothing wrong . The way of letting go is to accept the fact that you were not meant for each other and a better person is out there just around the corner .

Answer 3

First of all, you did nothing wrong according to what you have written. You do not deserve to be treated this way. Obviously, this other woman is very secure in her relationship that she gives you her cell phone number to contact him. Why put yourself through this. He has betrayed you and can't even be a real man and talk to you about it. You don't need or deserve this in your life. You are worth so much more than that. It's not a matter of him letting go, you need to get on with your process of letting him go, he's not worth it. Although it's hard, believe me I know, try to concentrate on yourself right now. Do some soul searching, think about your worth, do you deserve to be disrespected and betrayed ? It may be a long, hard process for you, but you can do it. Stop trying to get in touch with him, and if you have the overwhelming urge to do it, think hard on how you feel when he doesn't respond. Do you want to keep feeling that way ? You have too much to offer to someone who will love, honor and respect you. Remember, karma (simply put, what goes around comes around) is hell.

Answer 4

I think you should be patient, stop calling and in a near or further future you'll have your explanations. Right now might not be the good moment to ask about this.. You'll eventually be able to talk. But if he doesn't answer right now, don't insist, make a 180 degres turn and go on with you life.. Put your faith in time and don't waste your energy on this particular situation, like I've said, you'll be answered some day. good luck

Answer 5

It's nothing you did wrong. Some people are so caught up in how other people can further them, that they lose sight of the people that will do anything FOR them. He is not worth your time. She seems like she wants to rub your nose in it. You're a good person and you have a lifetime ahead of you. I can guarantee to you that you will meet the man of your dreams and you will be so happy that you didn't get stuck with this loser!

Answer 6

stop calling ... that is a desparate move. you are only 19 there will a whole lot of men... in your life.. you will forget this one. yeah she says its ok..to call..because she knows.. he is ignoring you and that makes here feel like the big winner. loving her for what she has is not love. maybe he just loves her and you can not face that. move on. stop begging. u probably did nothing wrong.. just picked the wrong relationship. and if she leaves him again... please do not be there for him again. it is time to grow up... leaving these people alone.. is the first step.

Answer 7

She may, or may not be telling you the truth about his responses. He may have no idea that you are calling him. I am not sure I would trust anything she is telling me.

If you know where he works, contact him there or contact him somewhere in person. Don't let a person with an ax to grind be telling you one thing and him another.

Answer 8

He doesn't like you anymore and doesn't want to talk to you. What part of that are you having problems understanding? It's not you, he just fits better with her. One day you will find someone you fit better with. Until then, don't turn into a psycho, stalker, bitter ex girlfriend, or no guy will want anything to do with you.

Answer 9

Let it go. In ten years you won't even remember his name. Find freinds, family, even pets to love on and confide in. It hurts, I know. You blame yourself, but it isn't you. Time heals wounded hearts. At 19, you should be dating, playing the field, sewing your wild oats. Don't try to settle down right now, otherwise when you DO try to settle down you'll try to sew your wild oats. Only to wind up in divorce court.

Answer 10

Move on.