I'm going on vacation with my wife and mother (for her 70th b-day) for a week in Hawaii. My mother is a bit quirky (read opinionated) and my wife has a low tolerance for real/perceived criticism. Any chance disaster can be diverted?
2007-06-29 11:42:19 · 13 answers · asked by skibum76 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Good luck buddy.
Your wife has a right not to be criticized! If your mother insults her she should stick up for herself, and you as her husband, should defend her.
I know you love your mother, but she has/had a husband.
You need to be a good husband now. You and you wife are taking mom on the trip, mom needs to act accordingly.
Yes, you can quickly avert a disaster by standing up for your wife the MOMENT your mother makes a nasty comment-she'll shut up when she knows it 2 against one.
DON'T BE A WUSS!!!!!!!!!
2007-06-29 11:50:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hm...good luck, skibum. When women decide they want to be in a snit, they get in it good. Should it happen on this trip...well, you'll need to rely on the emotional maturity of the other to help everyone through it. Better hope they don't both get into a snit at the same time.
If you have any skill at changing the subject and tactfully avoiding conflict, start honing it now. If you think either one would heed you when you lay down the law about behavior on this trip, lay it down now.
Apart from those suggestions...buy yourself a nice set of body armor.
2007-06-29 11:50:59 · answer #2 · answered by katbyrd41 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What made you decide on taking such a risky vacation?
Try to plan a lot of side trips so they aren't cooped together in the room. If they are both busy sight-seeing, etc.,they won't have as many opportunities to cross each other.
Good luck.
2007-06-29 12:06:03 · answer #3 · answered by Patsy A 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ohhhh boy. You're gonna' have your hands full playing referee. My brother has the same problem with his wife and our mom. He finally told his wife to not disagree with our mom so much. She doesn't have to agree, just not "DISagree" for his sake. It works pretty well. His wife has to leave the room now and then to collect her composure. But, so far it's working. Being on vacation together will be a tough one. Get a separate Hotel room for mom. So they both will have a get away plan.
2007-06-29 11:53:59 · answer #4 · answered by Vida 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have your mother invite a friend. That should divert attention away from the mother/daughter-in-law situation.
2007-06-29 11:48:09 · answer #5 · answered by Max 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm.. tough one. Take charge yourself. You make the decisions while on vacation. It keeps them from fighting over it, and complaining that the other's choice wasn't good enough. If anything, they can gang up and complain about the decision you made, but at least they won't be fighting!!! And you won't be stuck in the middle.
2007-06-29 11:47:21 · answer #6 · answered by water lover 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not really. I would try talking to them one at a time and let them know how important the trip is to you and that you want everyone to get along. That you would be really gratefull if they gave the effort to either get along or not interact a lot. you can't force something that isn't there so if they don't get a long you can't make them.
2007-06-29 11:46:12 · answer #7 · answered by vancie121 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes they shouldn't be on this vacation together..you can't force your wife and mother to get along....sometimes it just doesnt work...maybe they can just respect each other....If your mother is rude to your wife first then you should step in a back your wife up and tell you mother to back off and enjoy the vaca...or don't go....
2007-06-29 11:47:26 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should take your mother separately and your wife separately and everyone will have a wonderful time
2007-06-29 11:50:42 · answer #9 · answered by barthebear 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, talk to them seperatly first, then you need to understand that because you are married to your wife and not your mom ,,your wife does come first. "leave and cleave"
2007-06-29 11:48:41 · answer #10 · answered by jenram 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋