I suspect that my man is cheating. Is it wrong of me to go through his stuff to calm my suspicions?
2007-06-29 11:41:05 · 11 answers · asked by sometimes_i_wanna_die 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
do what you gotta do
2007-06-29 11:45:02 · answer #1 · answered by luv2help 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I am torn on this one. You are invading his privacy and showing a lot of insecurity by going through his stuff. Everyone is allowed to have their own personal/private things. But have his actions put you in a position to have to do this to protect yourself from hurt? I can see where this could be a really bad issue if you were to get caught doing it or if he finds out that you are so distrusting that you did this. It could backlash into a really bad fight and even end you relationship. If you are married I would say you have a little bit more rights because what's in your home belongs to both of you legally but not morally, so I would say it is still in a "gray area" even for a wife. But if you are right then maybe you will find the proof you need and you'll stop being decieved. I guess I would have to say that if you did this once that maybe it would be forgiveable even though it is wrong. But if you are doing this more than once then you have trust/insecurity problems that need to be addressed right away.
2007-06-29 12:01:59 · answer #2 · answered by Chris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. He will just use it again you in the long run. Bring it up, calmly. Or use a friend as an example. Like say that a friend think's s/he is cheating, what would he do about it. It's all about trust. It hurts when someone cheats. So at the last resort maybe break it off, but it really depends on the person and type of relationship.
2007-06-29 11:46:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You you decide to go through this stuff, be prepared for a couple of things.
1. To find something you don't want to really find out about.
2. Find nothing and feel guilty and not be able to tell him you've went through his stuff because he will not trust you around his things anymore.
I suggest you ask him point blank if he is doing things that he shouldn't be doing. If he says no, then leave it at that. If you still suspect he is cheating after he has told you no, then I suggest go through his phone in front of him or something. It's really a sneaky thing to do behind someone's back to go through their things behind their back. If he finds out about it, chances are he will throw it up in your face over and over whether he's cheating or not. I hope that he's not cheating on you. That's a hard thing to deal with. Good Luck.
2007-06-29 11:48:31 · answer #4 · answered by Teresa Dagger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is normal for girlfriends to be curious. What you need to do is look for signs. Does he cut off his phone every time you get together? When you call him is it off? If you feel strongly about your feelings just break down and ask him. You always need to know the truth, but you never want to give him the impression of that you don't trust him. Go with your heart. If you find out he is cheating, leave him, don't ever go back to that relationship. If you do then he will do it again. Good Luck!
2007-06-29 11:49:50 · answer #5 · answered by chihuahuas rock 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell's Yeah!
There are only two things you are going to find - proof, or nothing...
If you find nothing, then you have destroyed your relationship for NOTHING!
Even if you do find proof by going through his things (which would make him a complete idiot for not covering his tracks) - then you are no better than he is. BOTH of you would have ruined the relationship then...
If you look, then you might as well just walk out that door right now - and save yourself the potential pain.
If he is cheating on you, then sooner or later he is going to make a mistake - THAT is when you can confront him about it with ZERO guilt on your part ;);)
2007-06-29 11:50:20 · answer #6 · answered by kr_toronto 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on if your married or single........ now your going to a personal area...... be careful ok. me myself think it's wrong for a gf to do that unless your married... now that might be different.
2007-06-29 11:47:16 · answer #7 · answered by BIG BEN 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Well if he's your husband I would hire someone to follow him and give me the details.
2007-06-29 11:45:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be careful what you might find. If he's sleeping with someone else, he could be exposing you to diseases. Do what you gotta do
2007-06-29 11:44:14 · answer #9 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you really think so, and you're not doing it just to be nosey, then, no it's not wrong.
2007-06-30 16:08:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No but if he is innocent you need to learn to trust him.
2007-06-29 11:44:40 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋