if i get married now and have a big wedding next year will anyone know?

Question

i already planned my big wedding for next june. i just got pregnant and would like to get married at the court house now so i can be added to my fiance's insurance. we still want to have the wedding as planned. can we still do the ceremony (non religious) as planned w/out anyone noticing?

Answer 1

Eventually I think people would find out. Who cares if they do! Have fun on your wedding day!!!!!! :-)

Answer 2

You can do whatever you want. I'm sure though that people will know you were already married somehow when you have the baby. Questions are gonna come up about what insurance you have, who's delivering your baby, something will slip.

Now, how are you going to have a ceremony after already being married? Usually if you get married in court and have a wedding later on its because you're having a religious ceremony, otherwise the civil marriage is the wedding, how are you going to pull off having two of them??

It just seems like a lot. Specially after you have the baby, you're not going to want to deal with the wedding stuff and you wont enjoy it as much because you'll have your baby to take care of. Why not just have the wedding now.

I can tell you because I've seen it, this last April my husband's brother and his girlfriend got married, but they had already been living together and had a two year old and a 6 month old at the time of the wedding. Well they didnt really get to enjoy the wedding because they kept having to feed their kids, change their diapers, put them to sleep, carry them when they cried. The little girl cried when they were dancing their first dance because she wanted to be with them so they had to stop dancing to get their girl, things like that. I'm not saying they shouldnt have had kids, I'm just saying there's a reason you do the wedding thing THEN the baby thing. You will enjoy your wedding alot more if you dont have a two year old baby to worry about while you're trying to dance your first song together. Once you're more ahead in your pregnancy, your wedding is going to go downhill because instead of spending money on the flower arrangements you'll need to spend it on the baby's crib, clothing, diapers, formula, etc. you're gonna miss out on either a baby shower or a bridal shower I can almost guarantee you that. Its just going to be very difficult trying to do the wedding thing and the baby thing at the same time. You have no idea how time consuming it is to plan a wedding, well quadruple that with the baby thing, not good!!

Answer 3

It will eventually come out that you've already gotten married, it never fails, even if you don't tell anyone for years someone will see a marriage certificate or an insurance document (or if you're like me and live in a small town, someone will see you and say something) so I would tell a very select few people so that they aren't hurt by your "hiding it".

But if you aren't getting married in secret so much as for timing reasons and then having the big ceremony you've always wanted next year, it should not be any big deal. I would still invite each others' parents to the "real" ceremony just so when they do find out they don't feel left out. Everyone else will probably not care either way.

Good luck and congratulations!!

Answer 4

I am not sure about the insurance ~ you need to check into that if you will be covered since you aren't married yet. Some insurance companies are real pains in the butt with this stuff. Have your fiance check into this first. If you want to be married before your baby is born, you can certainly go ahead with a civil ceremony. Before anyone gets married, they need to go get a marriage license. This license makes the marriage legal. The ceremony at the church requires you to have this license. However, the church just gives you a marriage certificate, which does NOT make the marriage legal. My younger sister became pregnant before she was married and she and her fiance were legally married in a civil ceremony (judge) and then a year later, they had the church wedding. No one in our family had a problem with it at all, we understood the circumstances and had a great time at the wedding and reception. Good Luck!

Answer 5

People will find out somehow or another. But why does that matter if they find out or not. They are invited to the big one next year. I don't think they would care if you guys got married or not before the big one. and you can still do the non religious ceremony as planned. I don't see why not.

Congratulations on the baby and the wedding!

Answer 6

You can get married and not tell anyone, or tell only those that need to know or might find out, then have the wedding in June as planned.
It is NOT unusual for people to have a civil ceremony then have the "Big" wedding later.

Answer 7

Marriage is a legal contract. You can certainly go to the courthouse and make it official without telling anyone. It's your business. You can even wait to change your name until after you've had the public ceremony.

The ceremony is an event for your family and friends to celebrate the marriage. This can be done after you've been officially married if you want to.

The only thing that might be different is that some ceremonies involve the couple signing their marriage certificate. If you are already married, then you would not sign anything during the ceremony.

Answer 8

You don't have to tell anyone, but in some states, marriage is public record and if they wanted to, they could snoop and find out. We are a legit wedding officiant service and if oyu asked, no one would know you were already married at the second service, unless you wanted them to. You would need to tell your officiant that there would be no marriage certificate to sign, but the ceremony could be performed the same as if it was the first wedding. So, officially, it would be a vow renewal ceremony, or a re-commitment ceremony, but no one would have to know except you and the officiant, and no one would notice or know the difference.

Answer 9

In the US when a couple applies for a Marriage License that information is published in the local newspaper. Applying for a Marriage License is a matter of "public record." A Marriage License is a legal document issued by the county government. The Marriage License Department will supply the local newspaper with the lady's name, the gentlemen's name and their address.

If you do not want anyone to see your names listed in the local newspaper then you will have to get married in another community or another county or another state.

Answered by: A Certified wedding specialist / A Professional bridal consultant

Answer 10

They might notice the baby, but your friends and family won't know unless you tell them. The people doing your taxes will know. But why not just tell your friends and family and see if you can move the ceremony to a different location earlier than next June? If you explain the situation, everyone may pitch in and bring food or help with decorations. You might end up hurting those you love if the truth ever comes out. ou could still have a wonderful wedding with everyone's help without th deceit. It is worth thinking about.

Answer 11

Hey, people do this all the time, whether for insurance purposes or just to have less stress when the big day rolls around. Don't sweat it, but do be honest with your officiant (and parents, if they're going to be very involved) so they understand why there are no legal hoops to jump through when you have your wedding celebration. Also, if getting hitched legally ahead of time is going to cause family trauma or whatnot, check with your fiance's insurer to see if they offer domestic partner benefits (which are NOT just for same-sex couples). If the two of you have been living together for a while, you may be eligible.