me and my fiance have been engaged for about a year and a few months and its just not working out it doesn't feel the same anymore i do love him i am just confused right now nd don't know what to do please help
2007-06-29 04:41:57 · 20 answers · asked by Amanda M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
if u still love him & he loves u tell him that u need some time to b alone..maybe u'll change ur mind
if u know that it will never work talk to him about it also don't leave him without reasons u have to explain to him,this way u won't hurt him that much
don't forget 'u need to have a talk'
2007-06-29 04:48:10 · answer #1 · answered by HO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing that comes to mind is that maybe you two committed too soon.
What exactly are the problems, if any, and when did this change come about?
If there have been any changes lately within either of your lives, or yourselves, then that may be the problem, and sometimes the courting stage of the relationship is better than the marriage or even the engagement. There is no more excitement. It gets sour. It is sad, but true. Did he change? Or is he predictable?
Do talk to him, be honest with him, do some soul searching, and find out what it is that is making the relationship not feel the same anymore. I can't tell you whether or not to end it. You will know in your heart where to go from there.
Think back to when it was really good, and what made it so good, and try to find that back. If there have been changes, then depending on the changes, you'll know what to do.
2007-06-29 11:47:50 · answer #2 · answered by realstylesint'l 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him you need time to figure things out and you would like to end the engagement so you can think with a clear mind. Let him know that you still love him but things feel as if they have changed. If he is willing, engage in a conversation about what you feel has gone wrong in the relationship, and where you see yourself (or the two of you) headed in the future.
2007-06-29 11:45:35 · answer #3 · answered by blue_girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the engagement is not working out....then marriage should be completely out of the question. That is what the engagement is for....to figure out if you two are compatible. Do not feel guilty if you have decided you don't want to marry him, be grateful that your engagement was long enough for you to figure out that this is not going to work for you!!! Time to move on sweetie!!! Good Luck....better to call off an engagement than to file for divorce!!!!!
2007-06-29 11:46:26 · answer #4 · answered by yidlmama 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Before you give up have you tried talking to him about your doubts and concerns? If not you need to, especially with a commitment as serious as engagement. Maybe he is having the same doubts and concerns, if you are both willing to work at the relationship you may try a couples counselor.
2007-06-29 11:48:21 · answer #5 · answered by Ricky 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to your fiance, maybe go for counseling. If you have been together this long it would be worth it to try to work things out. Maybe it's nerves or fear as the wedding gets closer. It would be a shame to lose would could be a wonderful relationship over cold feet. Take the time to talk...maybe he shares your same fears.
2007-06-29 11:49:34 · answer #6 · answered by Gwen D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
About the only thing that you can do is let the guy know how you feel and then give him his ring back. Maybe it's just not meant to be and you need time apart.
2007-06-29 11:47:57 · answer #7 · answered by Nancy M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let him know your feelings, then work together and change that by which ever means you agree on. And if you do decide that neither of you is right for each other, just call it off
2007-06-29 11:45:32 · answer #8 · answered by stuartah2000 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you really just need to think about if hes the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with.. if you dont see him in your future, or you could see a future without him, then its probably time to end it... you definitely dont want to get married if you have any doubts. so there is no right answer any of us can give you, its all about how you feel. if you do decide to end it, then just confront him, dont skirt around the issue, because you dont want to waste your time or his.
2007-06-29 11:48:05 · answer #9 · answered by Kelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you confused? What's changed in your relationship? Are you getting closer to the date of your wedding?
Of course it doesn't feel the same. You've spent a year with this person. You're still getting to know them. You're getting their worst and best sides...
See marriage can be about love...but it's not always...it's sometimes about finding that one person you can STAND for the rest of your life...and that can stand you. You're going to annoy each other, you're going to fight, you're going to cry. The most important questions you should be asking yourself are...can I see myself with anyone else for the rest of my life? Do I want to? Do I want to see him with anyone else? Could I stand that?
Marriage isn't easy. It's not supposed to be, but you have to find someone you're willing to fight for, and fight through it with.
2007-06-29 11:49:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋