scared of guys, help?

Question

Whenever guys look at me and its pretty often, i get extremley self conscious. Most girls would die for the attention i get but i could die from it. I am scared to be touched or looked at by guys. I am not shy or insecure around men in general, I am just terrified of men. Please help
i guess it chages things a little, if i tell you i went through a traumatic event when i was little beaucase of a male teacher

i am almost 18 by the way

also i am straight, so dont say i fear guys because i am a homosexual.

Answer 1

there are quite a few people who have experienced the same things that you have, but here's what I have to say. You CANNOT generalize like that.. You can't say that all men are bad or be afraid of all men because of what ONE or more men may have done to you. There are many men in the world, and there are some men who are abusive, but not all men are like that. That's the source of most of the prejudice in the world. I know people who hate black people, they are scared of black people. When you ask them why - and if you listen you will find that one black person many years ago did something to them. But it's just not fair. It isn't even fair to be afraid. You have to allow people to prove themselves good or bad, scary or not. You can't generalize just because of one thing. If you can't work through this based on what I just told you, then please go and get professional help to work through this issue, because you'll need more help than what I or the others here can help you with. Many people here have been abused and understand abuse. But not everyone is like that. I know women who have been raped, and they have an understandable fear of men. But not every man is a rapist. Don't you see that? It's the one particular rapist. Many men go to their jobs and raise their families and are good men. All men shouldn't be punished because of the actions of one bad teacher.
Also, did you report that teacher? You should. That teacher needs disciplinary action. Also don't wait ten years, do it now.
also in your questions please tell people how old you are, we have no idea who we are talking to. You might be 6 years old for all I know. I have no idea.

Answer 2

The hardest thing in life is becoming a woman and liking it. There is so much to do before twenty years of age. Some females refuse and become anorexic and die. Some are depressed and later cut. Some females like other females after getting too much of it too soon. Gods creation makes one quarter of the population an outcast to life. It has been this way since Adam. The white society is the worst for helping all the children . It is easy to help most and let the few become outcasts in life. Don't give in or give up you are not unique.

Answer 3

At the core of the issue I see this question: Do you trust your ability to judge a man's character? Assuming that the answer is no, remember that your teacher manipulated a little girl, but you're not a little girl anymore. You have the power to associate yourself with people you trust, and to distance yourself from people you distrust. Simply talking to a guy in a public space does not put you in a position of vulnerability. Underneath the emotional layer of fear, your rational mind is perfectly capable of evaluating somebody during a conversation. Your challenge is to trust your intuition rather than your automatic emotion response.

Answer 4

well that traumatic event has to have something to do with it. Just know that there are many men out there who just want to be there for you. As a friend or something more.I can tell you that i am a man and i would never do anything to hurt a woman. If you can't get over your fear on your own you could always seek professional help. talk to a counselor or something.

Answer 5

That's normal, since you did deal with an incident involving a male. Things that happen to you as a child can be things that can scar you for life. I'd suggest finding a male you can build a friendship with, someone who doesn't look at you in suggestive ways, just someone who seems like they'd be a nice guy. Hopefully if you can learn to trust one guy, you'll see that not all guys are as bad as your teacher was.

Answer 6

My best freind is a guy. Guys are great.

You need to slowly get your trust in the male sex back. Whatever you went through is probablystill affecting you. I dont really liked being oogled either because I find it revolting and bothersome. Some is normal some you just need to take little steps to gain trust.

Answer 7

****Some tips on dealing with Traumatic events

*Write down your feelings and observations in a journal
*Draw
*Help out someone or volunteer for something
*Build on your "support system" - hang out with friends and family
*Learn from the traumatic event - has anything positive come out of it (like patriotism?)
*Try not to let it interfere - try to do all your normal activities
*Exercise
*Meditate
*Eat well
*Get plenty of sleep
*Turn to your religion for comfort (pray, meditate)
*Have fun and try to ?escape? sometimes (like going to the movies, working on a hobby)
*Don?t rely on alcohol or drugs
*Make a plan with your family and friends about what you would do in the event of a tragedy.

Answer 8

In light of what you went through, it's perfectly understandable. It may be worthwhile for you to see a therapist who can help you work through any unresolved negative emotions regarding what happened to you.

Answer 9

RAAAAAAWR IM GONNA EAT YOU!

(boys dont bite)

Answer 10

maybe you need therapy or you're a homosexual