How a man can fight an unusually strong need for a woman?

Question

Hi. I am 27 years old man and I noticed recently that my emotional need for a woman became too strong. I am not sure what it is, but I feel depressed. Either it is because I stuck in the social needs according to the Maslow's hierarchy of needs or I work in the same office with a beautiful woman, so my hormones are acting up. My work is in the IT industry, so I work either alone, so I dont get any feeling of social belonging, or I work with the woman, to whom I feel mix of love and passion, but cannot do anything, because of the sexual harassment laws and she also has a boyfriend to whom she calls every time and talks sweet, only increasing my depression. I have 3 month left in my contract, so I was wondering if I should try to survive these 3 months and hope that my next contract will have more social contact and acceptance and less beautiful and kind office mate, or should I go to mental clinic for counceling, because it became hard lately: I lost interest in my job, IT industry etc.

I mean EMOTIONAL need, not sexual, so dont send me links to sexshops lol

I tried online dating services, like match.com etc, but I have got only 1 positive response from a fugly woman who lived too far away from me. I think it may be because I am not good at explaining what I want from women and tell about myself. Do you know if anyone can help me with setting up a profile or maybe non-online dating service, where a real person can help me.

Answer 1

There are two issues here that have little to do with one another. The first is the woman in your work place. She already has a boyfriend (“whom she calls… and talks sweet [to]”). So you are barking up the wrong tree unless you are a masochist. The second issue is that you feel socially isolated. Being in IT, you probably spend more time looking into a monitor and touching your keyboard and mouse than to other human beings. Well, get out after work! (Or do you stroke your keyboard at home too?) Here are some suggestions.

(1) Get a roommate. Yes, a guy roommate, preferably one with a steady girlfriend, and with a wider circle of friends. They (mainly she) could introduce to one of her friends.
(2) OK, don’t get a roommate. Approach all of your friends and let them know, you are looking for a soul mate. Unless you are a real jerk, they will oblige since people love being match makers. (But if you just want to be a jerk and find someone to screw, this could lose you lots of friends.)
(3) Same with family members. They can be great match makers. Traditionally, that was the norm. It is still done in many cultures. I know two Indian fellows who were matched by the parents. Both hit GOLD. Gorgeous traditional Indian women whose sole job is to take care of their husbands. Great cooks also.
(4) Join a church or charity group. You’ll meet good people.
(5) If you just want to get some, take up dancing. (I kid you not. Dancing.) You learn to dance – swing, ball room, country, etc – you will have no problem. And it is great exercise.

So attend to your Maslov’s hierarchical needs. Get off the computer and do something about it.

[ I don't think you mean emotional needs. Otherwise get a dog. Why wouldn't a guy friend be the same. You also need to be more honest with yourself. You want a girlfriend. Not a "chat mate" and talk about your emotions. Girls do that.

If you want to hone your online dating profile, ask a friend for help. Ask that woman at work! She might even know a friend! ]

Answer 2

Go find a wife, don't marry immediately but start looking for someone who is marriage material. Give thought to what a life long mate for you would be. Think about physical attraction, mutual respect, financial styles, life goals. If you find a woman who would make a loving wife and mother for your children then marry and have a family, and in 20 years maybe a grandchild and were surrounded by loved ones and had a wife in your bed every night you might be much more happy.
Consider if you would like a women who already has children she is raising alone, they are sometimes excellent choices since you can see how they deal with children.

Answer 3

Get active in your community so you can meet many types of people, including women who have interests similar to yours. That way, you're open to lots of new people, rather than focused on one woman who is already taken.

Do not pursue the woman at work. Think about it this way: How would you feel if you were the boyfriend and someone else was pursuing her that way?

Answer 4

You should stick it out at your job for the next 3 months. It sounds like you're lonely. Why not try a dating service?

Answer 5

masterbate

Answer 6

masterbate?