Is it best for a man in the army to marry woman in the amry?

Question

I want to get married but i know how hard it is when a civilian woman marries an enlisted/officer in the army from my parents (i could be wrong for u smart people). So, would it be better to spend my life with a beautiful enlisted woman than a civilian woman who doesnt really understand the life of a soldier.

If possible can someone tell me the pos. and neg. on both sides?

(and if u cant understand where im coming from don't put anything slick or smart, because i hate that, knowing u wouldnt actually say it too me).

Answer 1

Civilian. If she loves you , she would understand. But remember just because she understands doesn't mean she is not going to miss you and worry about you.

Answer 2

I had no problems understanding what your thinking about, I'll give you that you've thought hard about this, probably unlike a lot of us.

I never gave it any thought until I was on the verge of getting married, then it suddenly changed my perspective on life, and I no longer wanted to serve if my wife, and children were going to be put at risk, not only that the thought of dying myself became an issue whereas before I really didn't care I was there to do a job and I didn't have to worry about what would happen if I did etc.

So working from that I would assume that if you did marry within the service then at least you'd be on the same footing and until children came along you wouldn't have the hangups I had.

As for understanding you've probably already noted the high incidents of divorce within the service especially when you end up on active duty. Another reason for inside.

Of course you meet a damn sight more women outside than you do inside, that can be a downer.

Although I've said all this chances are your gonna find love and a wife in the least expected place and all this has been a total waste of time when it slaps you round the head.

AJ

Answer 3

Well; personally I don't think it matters once you fall in love.

BUT, having said that...I married a Military man knowing what I was getting into; not because I ever served but because I grew up a Military brat and have lived this lifestyle my entire life. I actually knew more about the Military than my husband did when we first got married. I can keep up with his conversations just fine and I do understand that his job is demanding and I don't complain. I'm used to it...it's just the way things have always been in my life.

My sister joined the service and met and married a fellow service member. She found it too difficult to keep up with his career, her own, a house and three kids in 4 years. She got out and they're both happier because of it. They felt being a dual Military couple wasn't easier, but harder, on their relationship.

But, I also know some couple's that make it work. Although every one of them have voiced complaints about not having enough time together because of job demands and deployments.

Every couple is different and personality and adaptability are two huge factors in determining if a Military marriage is going to work or not.

Answer 4

it might be hard if your both in the military since you could both be deployed or stationed in different areas, but I have many friends that are married and in the same branch, even different branches. some branches though will try to keep the both of you together.

good luck and do what your heart says

P.S some civilian woman do understand the life of a military man, Im married to a marine and have been for 12 yr. its just some woman need to learn how to hold down the fort while their husbands are away

Answer 5

My husband and I are both dual millitary. Honestly I think its a lot easier when you both know about the army. I know many couples where the wife is a civilian and they have a good marriage, but the wives dont understand having to report at 4 in the morning or why you have to go to the field. It also helps with the millitary terminology.

Answer 6

My husband is in the army, I am not. We are making it work.

If you married someone that wasnt in the army:
Pos. Free health care for spouse, work opp. spouses come first, If youve been overseas theres vet benefits that effect your wife also.

Neg. I dont understand a lot of the military lingo and procedures.
If you married someone in the army: If you got deployed and she didnt you just get back home and she gets deployed you wont see each other forever. and if you wanted to have children . . . ( not saying that they would do that but I wouldnt put anything past them)

Answer 7

I have two uncles in the army and they have been happily married to their wives for a long while, one for over thirty years and another for about 15 years. Neither of the women is in the army, and both my uncles are officers, one retired one level below a general. You just need to trust her, and theat she will understand what the life will be like. Also if they love each other there is nothing being said they cannot stay together.

Answer 8

i would say the pros of marring a civilian are

you always know where she will be
can take care of the future children
can do normal things normal people do
when you come home she is there

the cons
wont under stand were your coming from
cant relate to what you've been through

now a lady in the military pros
understands where and what you go through
comprehends the emotions on a frist hand bases

and the cons
comprehends the emotions on a first hand bases
deployed as much as you if not more
no real relationship (one is always gone)
minimal contact

Answer 9

I would say a woman thats in the service would mostlikely understand the needs and thinking of a soldier. Wemon need alot of attention and a woman that doesnt understand the life of being shot at and faceing death each day IMO a realationship like this wouldent last.
Goodluck and thank you for serveing this great country

Answer 10

I served n the U.S Army and it was some of the best years of my life, serving n the armed forces was one of my biggest dreams in life,but I also had another dream in life,that was to be married , I personally felt that the armed services is not a place to have a wife, u personally being in the service should know some of the things i would be talking about there. I feel that it will come down to what do u want more n life, to be n the service or to be married. I wish u the best of luck in a decision that is best for u.and btw thank u for serving our country.