Another question on atheism, serious answers only please.?

Question

As you guys may have noticed from my other questions, I have not necessarily decided what belief system I feel best about. I am learning every day from people like you guys. So, let's say I realize some day that atheism is the correct way of thinking. Now, I'm suddenly faced with the (in my opinion) awful, terrible truth that when we die, we die, and that's it. How do you deal with this? How do you come to terms with that finality and go on living your life without being in fear that it could be over at any moment, or that someone you love will be gone at any moment, and you will never see or hear from them again? Please do not take offense to this.. I am asking objectively.

Answer 1

For me, I was freaked out for about a month, and then a light came on: It's not like I'll notice a lack of afterlife or anything.

Smooth sailing from there. =0)

Answer 2

It's a very good question and something difficult that we all have to face. The bad part is that there's no really simple answer to this. We'll each get through this in a different way. I completely disagree with a lot of Pangel's points, but at the same time I respect her and believe that method would really be effective for her. Personally, I don't think that establishing yourself as a memory with people really does anything. Afterall, when you're gone, you won't see the effects of it. It's a nice ideal, to try to leave a positive mark on the world and change it for the better, but I don't see it as a coping mechanism for this situation at all.

I'm much more of an individualist. It doesn't make much of a difference to me if I'm remembered. That memory would die out within a generation anyway. So my approach was much more solitary and cerebral. One evening, I just stared down the huge issues (death, suffering, suicide, etc.) It wasn't very pleasant, but after a while I found myself coming to terms with it all. Granted, I won't say I got over my fear of death, but I don't really see that as a problem. It seems arrogant to not be at least a little unsettled at such a daunting leap into the unknown.

So some people will say you should just enjoy your life, and that's enough. Others will say that making your memory live on means death isn't a complete disappearance. I just confronted the concepts and fought my way through. I know that one probably doesn't sound terribly appealing, but one way to change it would be to talk it through with a close friend, someone like-minded or at least willing to listen and support you. As scary or horrific as it is, I do think it's worth the time to think about it and reach a resolve one way or another.

Answer 3

Having seen quite a few elderly relatives I think I may be quite happy to die one day. Who wants to live forever? Not me.

As for it could all be over, well yes. Life can change in an instant. None of us know what will happen to us in a minutes time. I find it gives me a focus. A reminder to get on with it and enjoy as much of every moment as I can.

Because there's so much to be enjoyed in life, if we allow ourselves. Even simple things like a cup of coffee, a hot shower or a chat with a friend can make our day.

I guess I just don't think of it as awful or terrible. I am made from the atoms of stars, born at the beginning of the Universe. When I die those atoms will simply rearrange themselves again. It's not as if I can do anything about it!
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Answer 4

Understand something.
There are 150 major religions each containing one million or more followers. That gives you a .6% chance of believing the correct religion.

As for how to cope with death. Atheism isn't about an after life. We don't believe in that. It's about reality and making the best of what you have here. When you die you are going to be no different than any animal that dies. Dead as a door knob. It will be the same as it was before you were born. It's just a part of life and doesn't do anyone any good to worry about it. When it happens it happens. Till then enjoy what you have and make the best of it.

Heaven was created by man to make sending a soldier to their death easy. If they believe they are going to have some magical paradise then dying is no big deal. Well god is imaginary and that's just man taking advantage of delusional people.

Either way you have to decide for yourself.

http://yourgodisimaginary.com/

Answer 5

If anything, nothingness after death should give you even more motivation to live this life to the fullest -- because it's the only one you've got. And it's not scary, because you won't even exist to BE scared. It's like when you sleep and don't dream; it might seem weird or frightening now, but when you're actually experiencing it, you're not afraid.

As far as when other people die... well, obviously that's a tougher issue. But I guess you could find some comfort with the memories that you had with that person, and promise yourself that you'll always do what you can to keep that person's memory alive. Those are the kinds of things I always think of whenever someone close to me dies.

Answer 6

I'm afraid I might not be much help because I've never bought into the life-after-death scenario. I've always understood death as a natural part of life. The family cat gets run over by a car. The family dog develops cancer and has to be euthanized. Grandpa has a sudden heart attack and drops dead, face first, into his dinner. All that death is a perfectly normal part of life.

In the olden days, if you wanted a chicken dinner someone had to kill, pluck and gut the chicken. Such things were perfectly normal and nobody gave it a second thought. Nowadays, we have modern poultry slaughter houses and modern housewives are free to imagine chicken 'n dumplings without a single thought of the living animal which died for the sake of Sunday's dinner.

Religious superstition provides a cultural effect similar to the slaughter house and butcher shop. Imaginary immortality allows people to deny the reality of death by pretending death doesn't actually kill people. Both the butcher shop and religious superstition allow people to enjoy life without accepting the necessity of death.

I have recently adopted a rural lifestyle and now keep a chicken coop. The first time I had to behead, pluck and gut a chicken was so traumatic I was left with no taste for dinner. After more than fifty chickens, I now no longer even think of the condemned chicken as a living animal and go through the motions while thinking other, more pleasant thoughts. I definitely have a much better idea of where my dinner comes from and I no longer require a sterile butcher shop to protect me from the realities of life.

I think that once you give up the fantasy of eternal life, it allows you to adopt a much more realistic picture of the role of death in our lives. Like that first chicken I took to the chopping block, at first you will be uncomfortable without the familiar crutch of imaginary eternal life. I have confidence that, once you accept the reality of death, you will find that it is a perfectly natural part of life. Eventually, you will be amazed that you used to believe those silly stories.

(Your question was difficult for me and I'm not sure this answer properly conveys what I mean. I certainly do not mean to imply that someone you love is equivalent to tomorrow night's dinner. I'm honestly torn between deleting this answer and letting it stand, to see what you think about it.)

Answer 7

As an atheist and former Christian, I am in some ways much happier there is no afterlife. I waste less time now.

My mother, father, brother, a child and most of my grandparents, aunts and uncles are dead. I will never see them again. I remember them fondly, lovingly. They are gone. I will be gone, but that is okay because I wasn't here before and that was not a bad thing either.

I have no fear of death. Take seriously the words of the Gospels "Fear Not!"

Fear is merely the ordinary response we all make when our future is in jeopardy, just as excitement is the ordinary response we believe we are safe. Those who believe there is a magic hereafter have converted that anxiety to its biologic equivalent.

THAT IS FRIGHTENING, because Muslims and Christians have groups that are actively seeking the end of the world and are excited about it. The whole origin of the State of Isreal is from 19th century American Christians seeking to restore the Jews to their rightful place so Jesus can come and destroy all life on Earth. It was about three decades into the Christian restoration movement before Jews actually started thinking about a homeland, and it was about six decades before it was a serious discussion.

George Bush says he talks to God and God talks back to him. We have a person with control of nuclear weapons who is talked to, I assume, by voices. Like Bin Ladin, he also believes the end of life on Earth is a good thing.

You will die. There is nothing to fear because it will happen. If you are a Christian and you are right about God then you do have reason to fear since there is a chance you will burn in Hell for all eternity.

It isn't a terrible truth, it is a truth. Death is necessary, it follows from entropy. Enjoy the life you have. I think Francis of Assisi was correct in that our orientation in life should be one of joy and freedom. The monks correctly renounce money, sex and power to seek true freedom and joy. Of course, you do not need to do this to find true joy and freedom, but such a renunciation, if purposeful is a life bringing experience. If done out of fear, it is a dreadful prison.

Seek joy in this one and only life and fear not. You will die, almost certainly you will eventually be forgotten, but if you lived well and helped the world, you will have added to your children's children's children's experience of being fully alive and fully human. Take your life, your love, your experience into the world and make yourself a source of joy for yourself and for others.

LIVE...death will come...until then LIVE...when it comes...die in the manner you find meaningful and good, if you have control. In the event of an accident or some such tragedy, try to see to it that the events that lead to the tragedy were worth living through and risking life for.

Live purposefully, joyfully, fully and with vigor. Let the world shake with your happiness and your existence. Do not go quietly into the darkness.

Answer 8

I deal with it as I deal with anything else over which I have no control: I accept it.

That being said, I am much more comfortable with the thought of my own death as opposed to the thought of my kids dying. That is not because I am sad they will not have an afterlife to go to, an afterlife where I might be reunited with them, but because I fear the pain they might feel. And, I would miss them terribly. They are my children however, and I think that is a natural reaction of a parent.

My grandfather, who I loved very much, died a few years ago. I grieved briefly, for no more than a day. After that, I stopped grieving for my loss (not his loss, because he lost nothing. He'd lived his life.) and I focused instead on the great man that he was, and how fortunate I was to be a part of his life, and he mine. I do not grieve that I will no longer see him again. I had my time with him.

Answer 9

Death is only one state. There are other states like Arizona. Dwell on Arizona. :)

People die, it sucks but it happens. Live every day to it's fullest.

I can tell you that I was filled with anger when I realized I was lied to all that time. After a while it subsided and I learned more about life than ever before.

On your choosing which to believe, atheism isn't a belief. It is an understanding that there is zero proof of any god. Understanding evolution also helps if you need an understanding of history. Atheism is about thinking logically and analyzing what people tell you.

Answer 10

Once you are dead, you won't care . . . because you are dead. It's like worrying about the end of the world. If the world ends, there isn't a damn thing anyone will be able to do to stop it. So, why care? We'll all be dead anyway.

We can of course do what we can in the mean time to live our lives to the fullest and do what we think might be in our power to stop the end of the world. But we can't control everything.

Not worrying about this will lessen the stress you have in life. It will also allow more time for introspection on leading a good life and not fearing death or nothingness after death.

Answer 11

I can only speak for myself - I don't view that as a terrible truth. I don't think any atheist does......

If you were to become an atheist, you probably wouldn't see it that way either.

It's a case of you shedding the fantasy world. Or maybe another way to put it is like finding out there's no Santa. Sure it sucks when you learn the truth, but really, you probably knew it all along (how come he always came when you were in the bathroom brushing your hair?) but it's still a bit of a blow but you get over it.

As you age, you realize that the presents your parents bought for you are things you can buy for yourself - if you're responsible and have a good job.