My son won't make friends at school. He has only one(a girl). Should i keep pushing him to make more friends?

Question

The only friend he has at school is a little girl that he's known since he was born. He's very shy and won't play with other kids. He cries and dosen't want to stay at school, when she's not there. Do I keep pushing him to play with the other kids and make more friends? Do I leave him at school even though he's crying? I just don't know what to do! If anyone has any advice, I would greatly appreciate it.

Answer 1

`I get him involved in a sport, like soccer, something team like. Then he would get to be around other kids and maybe not be so shy. How old is he? Good luck!

Answer 2

are mommy and daddy shy? kids will often immitate their parents, so if they see you two being outgoing in social settings, they're likely to do the same... make sure you're setting a good example first. I think he needs to stay at school if it is actual grade school (and not a day care); if you start pulling him out of school when he cries, he'll know to play that card if he wants out. As for pushing to make friends, i wouldn't push him, but bring him places where social skills can be picked up like a park or a play area at a shopping mall. Any place where other kids hang out will be good for him, and having mommy and daddy nearby will give him some confidence and take some fear away. Other not-so-shy kids will come up and start talking to him... once that happens a few times and he's been engaged in conversations, he should start to come around. best of luck!

Answer 3

Honestly, when I was a little kid I was like that. I was very shy and I only had one or two friends that I've known since when I was born. My parents didn't care about this, but when I got older I naturally managed to make more friends. When you become older shyness usually wears away in most people, and you become more social and amiable. Still, at my age I have some quietness left within me, but it isn't nearly as much as when I was younger. In my opinion, I would let him be, but if you don't agree with my answer maybe you could possibly find a program like a sports team or a social event where he can meet new people his age. Remember, your son may have more than one friend. Anyone he's friendly with is his friend, not just who he invites over his house. You never know.

Answer 4

How old is he? If he's very small, like kindergarten or first grade, he'll outgrow it. Lots of kids have separation anxiety if they're used to being with Mommy all day and they suddenyl have to go to school. Maybe you could get the contact info of some of the kids in his class and invite them over for a play date so he can get used to them on his home turf. Then when he sees them in school, they'll be familiar to him and he won't cry to leave school anymore. The reason he sticks with his female friend is because she's a fmailiar face in a strange place. When the other kids become familiar too he'll feel more at home there. Go get those kids' numbers and invite them over!!

Answer 5

Try inviting one or two of the kids over to your house for a play date. He'll probably be better with just one kid at a time. Try to find a mom you like with a nice kid and do stuff together. Go to story time at the library. Visit a farm. Have park days. Try for 2 days a week so he's not overwhelmed.

After a few weeks, add another friend. Pretty soon you'll be able to set up a playgroup and he'll be more comfortable.

If he's really upset, you could always homeschool him. We do, but our kids are really social. I wouldn't force him to do something that is really hard when you have options. But if he's just crying for a few minutes, it will get better with time.

Talk with him about how to make friends and role play. I had to teach my boys to find someone who looked fun, introduce themselves and ask if they want to play. Usually it works. Ask if you can stay a few days with him to help him get adjusted. Help him to connect with another child. He'll probably find it easier to play with someone quiet instead of a really popular child.

He may just be naturally more introverted and will make friends in time. It's hard to be alone though, I feel bad for him and for you.

God Bless

Answer 6

Hi I have had the same problem with My little boy then when he hit the 1 grade he started to make friends with some of the boys but still he has more girlfriends then any I think you should just wait and stop pushing just to see if he does it by himself well I hope I helped a little Carrie

Answer 7

No you should not push him to have more friends, do not push him to play with others. He is a loner and there is nothing wrong with that. Leave him at school when is friend isn't there, he will find something else and maybe someone else to occupy his time there. But stop trying to force him to be something that he isn't. Not every child WANTS to be surrounded by friends.

Answer 8

My daughter does the same but she would only talk to the teacher! i started inviting some of the kids over for play dates so that way she could get to know some of them in a more comfortable environment. for her now she loves to go to school to play with the new friends she made!

Answer 9

You should invite a kid you think he would get along with or he seems to sort of like over to your house. It's a much more laid back enviornment and he'd probably be more willing to talk to the kid one-on-one than with his (other kid's) group of friends around. He'll want to keep talking to the new kid at school and will become friends with new kid's friends too!

Answer 10

Parties are a great time to meet new friends. You could also have a play date with some of the other kids. Have it at your house so he will be more comfortable & only have one kid over at at time.

Answer 11

Don't push him to make friends or it might turn out worse. Maybe you should home school him with a public online school, Connections Academy. You have teachers and he can make friends with other kids online.