Does a father has to apply gentleman etiquette to his daughters?

Question

or are his daughters an exception???? I'm talking about in public like let then pass first... hold a bag, open the door.... etc...

My father does not do any of this... I'm his daughter but I'm a grown woman... I think It makes him look rude... or is he right to treat me like a boy in public???

Ok... let me clear me things: I'm 24 years old! and my father and I work clase by and its a business enviroment... and Men here use to be very gentleman to any lady. That's why I feel weird when my dad does teh opposite to me, I mean not everyone knows I'm his daugther, they can assume he's not a gentleman.

Ok... let me clear me things: I'm 24 years old! and my father and I work close by and we share many momments of teh day, like lunch, etc. Its a business enviroment... and Men there use to be very gentleman to any lady. That's why I feel weird when my dad does the opposite to me, I mean not everyone knows I'm his daugther, people can assume he's not a gentleman.

Answer 1

He's not a gentleman, in my opi. Is he that way to your mother too? If so, he needs a good whoopin. Is his momma still around?
I only hope you don't naturally pick a mate that's like him, since if we don't keep our eyes open, we often tend to by default "find" someone similar to our parent(s).
My dad was a gentleman sometimes, but my mom sometimes told me secretly that 2 of my uncles were better role models as gentleman.

Answer 2

No man HAS to apply gentleman etiquette to any woman. That's what makes it being a gentleman. He doesn't have to of course, but perhaps he should. It may just be the way your relationship is. Were you guys more playful with a "one of the boys" types of relationship when you were younger? That could be why. My dad always treated me a bit TOO MUCH like a girl. He's always opened car doors for me, opened other doors, let me go first, etc. But there was a down side to that, too. He never wanted me to rough house with the boys and never really thought I was tough enough to make it on my own.

It's probably just your dad's personal taste and I doubt he means anything by it. He probably doesn't realize that it makes him look rude because one's offspring being grown is somewhat of a foreign concept. Fathers often don't realize that the rest of the world doesn't see their little girl the way they do.

Answer 3

A gentleman is a gentleman no matter where and to whom he directs his attention.

Your father is still thinking of you as a child - not necessarily that you're a boy - but a child - who should show respect to his/her elders.

Of course, he's rude - and should behave as a gentleman - and hold the door etc. But you, on the other hand, are his daughter - forever, I might add - so try cutting the man some slack.

And, if he's carrying your packages - you can hold the door for him.

Answer 4

I think it is rude too. Your dad should treat you at a high standard so that you know what a man should treat you like. It should of started when you were a child. My husband treats our daughter that Way so when she dates she will find someone who treats her right and with respect.
Only thing maybe he is trying not to baby you, letting you be a grown woman in the business world. That sucks but maybe. Ask him why he does not do this for you.

Answer 5

I think that your dad is treating you like an adult in a world where equality is the norm. This must have been going on since you were a child?

Sounds as though the way people perceive you and dad together is what is bothering you.

Sit down and have a chat with dad if appearances are that important to you.

Answer 6

I think a father should do that stuff when your a little girl. Its a part of growing up and a father showing his daughter what a real genteman should be and what is right for a man to do. Doing that sort of stuff now when you older is a little weid. Opeing the door is fine but holding your bag or purse come on. People will think your dating

Answer 7

It's not rude. He's not treating you like a boy. He's giving you the freedom to be what you want. Unless you speak up, this will continue.

"Dad, I notice that you don't open doors or hold my bag when I need it. What's the reasoning behind that?"

He may say, "Gee, I hadn't thought of it..." or he may also say "In this day and age, to open a door for a women is sexist and I wanted you to grow up empowered."

Give him a break. Guys can't read minds and they can't seem to get anything right anymore.

Answer 8

I think he should. At home he can treat you as his daughter out in public he should treat you like a woman. That's what my dad would do. When dad and I would go out to eat together he would open the restaurant door, pull out my chair. In other words Dad treated me like a lady however when we were at my parents home I was just another one of his children.

Answer 9

What kind of mideival family did you grow up in? He's not treating you like a boy, he's treating you like any other person. It's a very rare man that holds doors open for the ladies. That's not something that happens very often at all, and then generally only by guys looking to get on your good side so they can get into your pants. Why are you getting all upset about it? You don't sound like a "grown woman" to me. Getting upset about this makes you sound like you're about fifteen. Chill out. If it bothers you that much, bring it up with him.

Answer 10

You are his daughter, it is the opposite, you pay him respect. While you are right for all the other males of the species, showing respect as one shows to a lady is restricted to one lady within his household, his wife.

Every society on Earth that I've observed where showing deferrence to the female of the species is considered good manners. There is always one exception, withing the household, only one woman receives deferrence by the husband is his wife, within the walls of the household, she is the boss.