How old do you think my daughter should be to get...?

Question

a. a cell phone
b. her own tv (in her room)
c. her own computer (also out of my sight)
According to my 11 year old, we are the only parents in the world who supervise tv, computer usage, and are not considering a cell phone for her at the moment. She is smart and well behaved. What's your philosophy?

Answer 1

My daughter is 11, she has a TV in her room (with a parental block on all inappropriate channels), no computer, though. Our solution to the cell phone issue was to get her a prepaid cell phone that you have to purchase minutes for, and she has to do her chores to earn minutes. It has worked wonders for making her keep her room clean and get her chores done.

Answer 2

She's smart and well-behaved.....so you must be doing something right. She's 11 now. Consider in a year allowing her to babysit a couple of hours a weekend close to home, or some other small job around the neighborhood. With the money she earns, she can purchase her own TV or prepaid cell phone. Not only will that teach her to work and earn for the extras she wants, but she will better appreciate the things she has earned on her own. As for the whole computer issue...if she has a "household' computer, why is there a need for her own (out of sight)? IMO teens should absolutely be supervised on the computer...haven't you been watching those To Catch a Predator series on TV? The old "But my friends are allowed..." should never be an acceptable argument.

Answer 3

Well, With my parents I had to be 16 and have my own job and afford the bill myself before I could get a cell phone. However, I think that it would depend if she really needs it. If she plays alot of sports, or stays after school alot, then maybe a cell phone would make sense, it would not make sense for her to have it just to be "cool" cause everyone has one.

The TV I think is no big deal, there is no need to supervise that at 11, I had one in my room since I was 6, just use your judgement, if she ends up spending too much time in her room because of it, then take it away.

The computer I do not think you should supervise her computer usuage, but also.. ask yourself the logical questions.. does she use the computer for alot of school work, or does she have a hard time getting computer, is there always someone else on it.. the ONLY reason to consider getting another computer is if alot of people are using it.

Answer 4

All kids tell thier parent they are the only parents that wont let them do something. As far as the TV, my daughter is 9 and has always had a TV in her room. We are big TV people though. The cell phone is an issue with every kid. I view them as great tools that can help out a lot with keeping us safe. Does your child do a lot of after school activities where you need to be called to pick her up? Does she go to the mall or movies with her friends by herself yet? If so, maybe you could get her a prepaid or one of those firefly phones for kids. The computer I am leary of. The internet is a scary place especially if you have young girls trying to act older than they are. I would also make some phone calls & talk to some of her friends parents & see if they really let thier child do these things and why they feel it's ok. Chances are they will tell you thier daughter does not have a cell phone & a computer or TV in thier room.

Answer 5

Wow, and my daughter said we were the only parent also..
I have a 12 yr old and 10 yr old.

A. Cell phone: Why? Cells phones are for emergencies. Is your daughter ever in a place (alone away from home) where she can have an emergency and need to call you? probably not at age 11 unless she walks home from school.

B. TV's aren't needed in kids rooms. Have a spare room with a TV maybe, but not in there own room.

C. Her own computer: Not until it becomes a necessity where she needs it for tons of homework. Probably not until High School.

Answer 6

My 11 year old:

a. Has his own cell phone. It is a prepaid one, to be used for family emergencies. (I'm divorced and can't get in touch w/ him at his dad's cuz his dad turns the phone off) If he runs out of minutes before he should, then it's too bad for him.

b. He's had his own TV in his room since he was an infant. It worked better than a nightlight.

c. We have a family computer. He cannot have his own internet out of my sight until he's 18 and can pay for his own and I'm no longer responsible for anything he puts on the computer. I trust my son, but I don't trust the predators and perverts!

Answer 7

Even smart, well behaved children can be fooled by internet predators! You are very wise to monitor her computer usage. Our 10 year old son does have a TV in his room, but we do monitor and limit his use. We do have a cell phone available for his use, but he isn't allowed to carry it with him 24/7. It is a nice convenience item, and he takes it when he is on an outing with friends and their parents, if he spends the night at Grandma's, while on a bike ride, etc. I work with kids, ages 5-18, and know good kids occassionally make poor choices. Assure your daughter you are NOT the only parents in the world who supervise their children, and although she will not believe it, she is quite lucky to have parents who care so much!

Answer 8

At 14 a cell phone is appropriate, with limited send and receive capabilities (friends phone#s blocked). A tv is never appropriate in the bedroom until college is finished. It is a distraction. You put the PC in the living room and password protect all but educational and appropriate entertainment sites. These measures will help ensure that she stays smart and well behaved. As for you being the only parents to supervise tv and internet , I can't imagine you even considered that to be the case.

Answer 9

Good for you. I am the parent of two young children and share your philosophy. I do have to admit that my children do have a television in their room, but no cable/satellite. We are able to determine what they can or can't watch this way. My children will not be getting their own cell phones for a long time to come. My older child has asked me why and I simply tell her that if she is ever in a position to need one I would let her borrow mine. She really doesn't like the reasoning behind that, but it does end the arguement!! Everything my children do on the computer is within eyeshot as well.

Answer 10

a. When she can pay the cell phone bill herself.
b. Never. Studies show that having a tv in the bedroom interferes with sleep for people of ALL ages.
c. If the computer has no internet access, then now is fine. With internet access, she needs to wait until she's an adult and out of the house. Sorry, but there are zillions of predators out there who find the Internet to be a lovely way to reach innocent pubescents who are just ripe for the picking. Parents need to supervise their kids' on-line activities to protect their kids from these criminals.

Answer 11

Well of course your kid would say that - she thinks you're 'dumb'!
A cell phone when she is working at a real job and can pay for everything herself. Kids DO NOT need cell phones.
Her own tv when she can buy it herself - but NOT in her bedroom - my son saved and bought one for himself at 14, but has it in the rec room for his own use.
And the computer MUST be in a high traffic area. No trust on that til she's legal age. No myspace or facebook, check her history and email OFTEN and make sure she knows you are doing it.
Smart and well behaved are not the criteria to use. She's a CHILD, and at an age easily influenced by her peers.
Be STRONG parents... and don't cave.