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My girl and I are experiencing some major sex issues, meaning she's really not performing all too well. This happened after our sex talk with the minister at our church. We are raised Christians and are very devout in our faith. We're both part of the Holy Christian American Youth Alliance.

The minister claims it's wrong and we should repent for our sins. To tell you the truth I only believe him partially as I did not read anywhere in the Bible that says couples shouldn't have and enjoy sex. It goes completely against the Christian faith as how can we procreate if we don't regularly consummate our relationship.

My delimma now is that I don't know how to make her hot again during our lovemaking? This might tear us apart as I don't want to end up getting some on the side and still be with her. Please help, any suggestions if you're going through the same thing? Peace!

2007-06-27 18:07:02 · 18 answers · asked by Skyeboi 2 in Society & Culture Religion & Spirituality

18 answers

Get a life.

2007-06-28 00:29:29 · answer #1 · answered by ~~∞§arah T∞©~~ 6 · 1 0

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/CjR6l

2015-01-28 15:08:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Invite her girlfriend and the minister to join you guys for sex.
That would add some spice, no?

Or if you are the good Christian you claim to be,
abstain until you get married.

Your minister is right.........repent, or get the
hell out of dodge.

You need to quit calling yourself a Christian and
join the church of Sex In The City......and leave the
Holy Christian American Youth Alliance alone.

It's sounds to me as if you are totally clueless as to what
being a Christian means.

2007-06-27 18:36:52 · answer #3 · answered by the menace 2 · 2 1

Once again the Christian religion smears a perfectly good relationship with it's guilt tar. Two adults are enjoying each other as nature intended, and this wacko minister has to ruin it. Sickening.

The only advice I can offer is for you to really examine this event very closely and ask yourself if Christianity is good for you, or if it's simply controlling you.

This is your chance to break out, and think for yourself. I hope you make it. Good luck!

2007-06-27 18:30:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1 2

Yo, having pre-marital sex in God's eyes is a sin. The 4th commandment, "Thall shall not commit adultery". Your minister is right, repent from your sins! Sex is a gift from God, but using it before marriage is miss using it. I can't really answer your question about how to make it better, but mabey stopping, and wait til marriage is what can make it better.

2007-06-27 18:17:49 · answer #5 · answered by Tr3vor 2 · 4 2

I've read that the largest sex organ Humans have is their BRAIN. Sounds like your minister may have snuck a Virus in there!

2007-06-27 18:14:08 · answer #6 · answered by Champion of Knowledge 7 · 1 1

Try abstinence for about a month (and don't cheat with "yourself"). You'll be happy to be getting some and it will feel much more intense relative to the previous month.

Really, if it's just sex, maybe you need to put romance back into it. Make her feel sexy and not just like a sex object. She'll then want to show you how sexy she is, and from there I imagine you can proceed however you like.

2007-06-27 18:19:08 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 2 2

Well.......I can't give you the Christian perspective on it, but the Jewish perspective might help, since it's the original.

I guess Christianity changed it to be something different.

In Judaism, sex is seen as a gift, a wonderful, delightful gift from God, given to married couples. We are to delight in our husbands and wives and please each other to the fullest. In fact, a man is obligated by Jewish law to please his wife in bed, or she can divorce him!

Now usually it doesn't go this far, because Jewish wives and husbands who truly love each other take full advantage of this wonderful gift of physical intimacy with each other, and by doing this they become very strong as a couple, very devoted to each other, and very bonded with each other. It's really a beautiful thing.

To hold back from each other is considered a sin, sort of, and very bad for the marriage, because holding back is keeping the couple from being as united as one as they COULD be, as strong as they COULD be as a couple, and as bonded as they COULD be as a couple.

Judaism has a really good understanding of the foundation that needs to exist for a husband and wife to be as closely bonded as they can be. And we're very practical too. :-)

There were some ancient Jewish sages who said we couldn't do anything except the missionary position, for instance, but the other rabbis came to shout that down and say no no, whatever makes them happy and unifies them and bonds them is permitted, as long as it is only between them and no one else. In other words, all positions are permitted, especially ones that bring the female the most satisfaction.

As far as oral (without getting too graphic), many Orthodox Jews refuse to do this, thinking it is not holy or respectful. However, many MORE Orthodox and non-Orthodox Jews believe it is just fine, a natural expression of two people in love who want to make their mates as happy as they can and bring them as much pleasure as possible.

So there you have sex in marriage according to Jewish tradition and law.

Maybe this will help her relax and enjoy again. Good luck!

P.S. This is only for married couples, by the way. You might be interested to know that long ago, if an unmarried couple had sex, this automatically made them married from then on. :-)

2007-06-27 18:19:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 3

It sounds like your girlfriend is falling under the conviction of the Holy Spirit because you two have not sanctified your relationship by the rite of Holy Matrimony. Why don't you get married and do it God's way like Jesus said?

Matthew 19:4 He answered, "Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, 'Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh'? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."

And like Paul wrote to the believers in Corinth.

1 Corinthians 7:2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

2007-06-27 18:15:58 · answer #9 · answered by Martin S 7 · 4 3

May be your minister is saying you are sinning because you are fornicating outside marriage? Ever consider it might be your "performance" that might be affecting her performance?

2007-06-27 18:10:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 8 1

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