A question for atheist parents or atheists in general?

Question

How do you/would you raise your children to communicate with Christian children if the topic of God comes up between them?

What would you tell your child if he or she asks about God, Christianity, or the bible? For instance, if your child asks, "Mom/dad, is God real?" how would you go about explaining things to them?

Christian parents raise their kids believing in God, etc.--do atheists raise their kids to not believe in deities? Or is the topic of religion non-existant unless the child asks about it?

Answer 1

This is actually the main reason I started coming to religious forums. I wanted to hear what people said so I could think ahead about what I would need to say and give my children thoughtful and appropriate answers. My oldest is only 3 so the topic hasn't come up yet.

I know it's important to let them find their own path, but I also know I can't be completely unbiased when they ask me because I do have strong opinions on the topic. It would be lying if I told them I was entirely neutral. I do not approve of Chritianity, I do not like the morals it teaches or the world view it promotes - I think it's unhealthy and limiting.

My intention is to teach my children to respect others' beliefs, but that they don't have to have the same beliefs if it doesn't suit them (nor the same as me either). When they show an interest, I'll tell them the basics of Christianity and I will also explain why I don't participate in it. We have several Bibles in easy reach on a bookshelf so they are welcome to read them as they please. I will tell them the Bible was written by people, about the Council of Nicea, etc, and that some people believe it is divinely inspiried (but that I don't).

God is a trickier question because, frankly, it's not a very well-defined concept. There's the question of which god, and what is it like exactly, how personified is it or is it something more abstract. If they are interested I'll show them about Taoism and paganism, my preferences.

Honestly I intend to tell my children that the truth is, that the most important thing is that they be the best people they can be, and all spiritual issues will sort themselves out in the end; it's all just window dressing. I want them to think critically, to question where something seems wrong, and to find answers that bring them peace in their hearts.

Answer 2

Growing up...as children we were generally more interested in things that are more interesting to children, so religion and beliefs didn't come up much. A good friend and I have known each other since we were 10, we are now 28. She didn't even realize I was an atheist until last year, thanks to this site... It's just not a subject we ever talked about much, and I never discussed my own view as a non believer.

As for my upbringing in regard to 'gods' and such...no I was not told it was real or any of that, but told that it is what some other people believe, we all have our different beliefs, and that's okay.

Answer 3

In short, there simply would be a lack of religion in the house. Religion discussion wouldn't be banned by any means--perhaps even encouraged, and if my children chose to believe in any religion I would have no objection--I don't think my beliefs should be forced upon them.

As for communicating with Christian children...No different than communicating with any other children. I wouldn't even mention any difference in treatment. If the topic of God comes up...I'd have my children say what they believe in--I'd prefer not offensively, but honestly--whether or not it coincided with my beliefs.

If they asked if God was real, I would most likely say "I don't think so, no". If they decide otherwise I don't have an issue with that.

Answer 4

I don't think kids talk about God or Christianity other than holiday's and then it is no different than talk about Santa. A child is ready for an explanation when the ask a question. I would let them decide for themselves on the God issue, but would educate them on the mythology that is religion.

Answer 5

Well, that's quite a bit in my future, and I'm not an atheist, but I'll give it a go:

"Mom, is God real?"
"Well, nobody knows for sure, but I don't think so. God is more like a big fairy- he helps people remember to be good but he's not actually /real/."

I tried to think like an atheist. @_@ But I know I'd raise my child to know that God/gods are imaginative characters, invented for a greater good, and some people still believe. That doesn't make the dumb or gullible, it just makes them different. Something like that. ;D

Answer 6

I would explain to children what religions are just as I would explain the various political parties. I expect them to make up their own minds about politics as they read more and understand what is happening. Similarly I expect them to make up their own minds about religions. I have no problem with anyone reading anything and would be disappointed if children of mine did not read the Bible, the Koran, the Book of Mormon etc. They don't have to believe any of it is true, they can sort that out for themselves.

There are no Christian/Muslim/Jewish/etc children. They are too young to make any sensible decisions on religion. There are only children of Christian/Muslim/Jewish/etc parents. Brainwashing kids is wrong. Educate them, don't brainwash them.

Answer 7

I would tell my child the truth and explain that there is zero evidence for any of the thousands of gods that mankind has invented. Regarding friends and other people, I would explain that by understanding the former explanation, they are more rational and less fearful than all the deluded people in the world, and therefore more intelligent.

But, for the sake of "fitting in" and not being shunned as arrogant, I would also teach them how to carefully skirt religious subjects, and use their superior intellect to gracefully sidestep religious topics so as to not cause offense.

In other words, I'd teach them that when it comes to religion, they have to treat most people as if they've been emotionally arrested since the age of five.

(Incidentally, I would still give my children a general understanding of all major religions, since this information, despite being nonsensical, is relevant to life and functioning in society.)

Answer 8

The UK is a secular society with falling church attendance and a freethinking press ,media, and educational system. In the vast majority of cases educational standards are good, Atheism is commonplace, and religion very rarely EVER appears on TV.If you tell a child that religion is fiction, he will accept that fact, and will receive confirmation of that fact when he receives further education. Intelligent children know fact from fiction. The better the education, the fewer the churchgoers !

Answer 9

1) I'd tell my children to say as little on the topic as possible.

This is ironic, because here I am a loudmouth about the topic. To be honest, wise people keep their mouths shut.

2) I'd tell my kid "you can figure out if things are real by yourself. How do you know that I am real? How do you know the cat is real? Can you do those things for God?"

And then if they were wrong, I'd tell them how I figure God isn't real, starting with the simple explanations.

Answer 10

Atheist parents do not tell their children that christians are evil and are going to hell. They do not say to avoid christians because their delusions might rub off. Who cares if people want to be deluded and believe in the tooth fairy. Children need not fear that they will fall into the same delusion. Christian parents, on the other hand, are driven with fear.