Wait...I DO want him to propose, but hear me out:
My boyfriend and I planned a trip to Paris and we're leaving soon.A month ago, my boyfriend told me he is proposing to me some time this summer.
Well we've talked a lot about the proposal and ring and everything and I don't know for sure but it's starting to sound like the proposal will take place in Paris. Sounds wonderful, I know...so why do I not want that to happen? Read on....
My family is very religious. My parents are against me going on this trip in the first place since my boyfriend and I aren't married...but I'm 28 years old and there's nothing they can do...so they pretend to be happy but I know they're not. SO my parents have refused to tell the rest of the family (grandparents, cousins) that I'm going on this trip w/ a man who I'm not married to...and I'm afraid if he proposes over there, how will I tell my grandparents?
I love him so much and I want to get engaged, but how do I ask him not to propose in Paris?
2007-06-27 11:50:47 · 17 answers · asked by rrrsssrrr 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Also...like I said I don't *technically* know for sure that its going to happen in Paris. Just all the hints he's dropped and everything make me think that. :)
2007-06-27 11:51:51 · update #1
How romantic would it be if he did propose in Paris? It would be a fabulous story to tell everyone else in your life and one that will live on long after your grandparents have (sad as that may seem) one that you can share with your grandchildren. Just tell your family members that he propsed over dinner, or over looking a beautiful scene or something like that, depending on what he actually does, t won't necessarily be a lie, you just leave out the "in Paris" part. But it is kind of sad that you can't share even the memories of the trip with your family members. If he has planned to propose to you in Paris, this is something he has probably thought about and worked long and hard to set up perfectly, it would be kind of sad to let the air out of his sails.
2007-06-27 12:56:02 · answer #1 · answered by LoveWithNoBoundaries 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is something that you want then don't worry about what your parents think. This is your life and you have to live it to make you happy and everyone else needs to just fall in line and support you. I think when everything is said and done your family will be very happy. If it does happen in Paris it would be something each of you will remember for a lifetime and something to look back upon. If it does happen just make the announcement to your grandparents and I'm sure that they would be thrilled as you are living your life and are making decisions to make you happy. Good luck to the both of you and relax and enjoy Paris, it is the most romantic city so they say.
2007-06-27 12:02:04 · answer #2 · answered by Diggity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They don't have to tell the other family members you're going on the trip, in fact I don't see why they would mention it anyway. If it happens, tell your family you are engaged. If anyone ask how he proposed, mention the trip. Don't feel bad for your choice, you're an adult. If your parents refuse to accept you even going on a trip, it doens't mean you have to hide the fact from the others. Please don't tell him not to propose. I know when my husband did it, he had it so planned out. I think it spent 2 months just planning it all out. If he's planned it, it's meaningful & special to him. Just enjoy yourself, if it happens enjoy your moment, & don't let anyones opinions of what an almost 30 year old woman does with her life make you feel bad or as if you can't be honest.
2007-06-27 12:19:25 · answer #3 · answered by layla983 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Firstly think about what YOU want not what your family wants.
Families are like that why want to choose what they think is the best thing. But you have to think about what makes both of you happy not what makes your grandparents happy or mom and dad. He can propose to you in Paris (where its romantic) and he can do a more family oriented proposal with your family. (where its not as romantic)
Remember when you guys get married it will only be you two not all the family. So do what is best for you and him.
2007-06-27 12:07:13 · answer #4 · answered by PuesYo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look, dont ruin this special moment for yourself and this man. Let it happen. Keeping secrets never works, and your parents are being unneccessarily protective. Chances are Grandma would be the first one to approve. Remember, Grandparents have lived a lifetime of experience, and they usually know a lot more of what is going on.
Let your boyfriend propose to you. It sounds so lovely and romantic. Your parents sound like they ar the ones who have the problem....let them lie if it suits them. But you should be yourself and live the life you choose. Why let a beautiful gesture, every girls dream proposal, be ruined just to keep your parents happy. I believe when you get home and tell your grandparents, they will be so happy for you they wont care that you were travelling with the boyfriend.....you could always lead them to believe you stayed in backpacker hostels with groups of other girls and guys. Good luck to you.
2007-06-27 12:02:30 · answer #5 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Enjoy your trip. If he DOES propose, it will be an extraordinary event for both of you. maybe you can call home from Paris after it happens (and before you arrive home) and tell everyone -- give them some time to cool their jets and get over it before you get there. And no matter what anyone may say about it, he'll soon be a part of that family, and it won't matter.
I hope your trip is fabulous, and your ring is gorgeous, and that you have a long and happy marriage!
2007-06-27 12:08:43 · answer #6 · answered by hrhtheprincessofeire 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Surely your family doesn't think you're still a virgin, so why keep up the charade? If you told your grandparents that your boyfriend proposed while standing on the Eiffel Tower overlooking the city, and then having pictures to boot, I betcha they will keep their mouths shut and be happy for you. And it's about time you tell your parents to keep their opinion to themselves.
My family is very religious as well but I don't allow their beliefs to dictate how I live my own life. I live with my fiance and I don't make any apologies about it and my family decided be supportive and put my happiness above their religious expectations for me.
2007-06-27 12:29:35 · answer #7 · answered by Peace 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your 28. Dont let your family run your life. If you want to live with this man they may be mad but its your life and they would still love you and they would get over it. Now go to Paris and Hope he proposes because that would be an awesome experience and story for anyone who ask.
2007-06-27 12:00:08 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let him propose! Let it be a special secret between the two of you, but tell the family and friends it happened at a different time.
Also, do you think that even if her proposes their going to be upset that you went on a trip with a man? I think most would think it's romantic and be excited for you!
2007-06-27 15:48:19 · answer #9 · answered by kimandryan2008 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just answer questions simply. For example:
How did he propose?
Oh, he got down on one knee and said.....
When did it happen?
Right after a walk in the park and a nice dinner...
Where did he ask you?
We were just at a little cafe.
OR
Just tell them that he took you to Paris in order to propose to you, so it sounds more romantic than anything else they might be thinking.
2007-06-27 13:27:19 · answer #10 · answered by fruitnroo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋