How long should we wait?

Question

Me and my boyfriend have been together for 14 months and we are very happy and a perfect fit, but we're only 18 how long should we wait till we get married. I don't think he's going to want to wait till after college, any help?

Alot of you said wait till you financial stable, but we both are I have a job paying $12 an hour and he's got a job paying $10 dollars an house plus he's in the military, they pay for his college and he gets paid every month.

Answer 1

If you are in a secure, committed relationship, he will wait until after college. If the two of you want to get engaged, fine...but wait to marry until AFTER your college years are over. Then you can walk into your marriage as equals, able to financially, emotionally and mentally support each other for your future. Do not rush it...enjoy your youth, and enjoy your dating years.

As for your additional comments about financial stability...honey, do you really think you can securely raise a family on an income of 10 or 12 dollars per hour? No. You need to finish college and have a career, not just a job.

Answer 2

There is no need to rush. I had been a relationship for longer than that when all of a sudden we had a huge argument that almost split us apart. We are still together (and getting married soon), but trust me 14 months is not long enough. Not saying that you wont work out, but if he wont wait until after (or later on during) college, then let it go. If he truly loves you and want you in his life, he will wait for you (not for like ten years or anything crazy like that) but HE WILL wait. I personally think you guys should wait at least another year. If you still feel the same then go for it. But dont get married because you guys are a "perfect fit" and hes going away to college, because that is not a valid enough reason. Let him get a taste of college life and see how things go from there. That will be the tell all of your relationship. Good LUCK!!

Answer 3

I'd say about 5 years. You should most definitely wait until you're both done with college, and are established in your new careers.

For one thing, if this is really the love that will last forever, you don't need to be in a hurry!

For another thing, it can only add to the difficulties of marriage (and there are many!), to be in school and trying to find careers while you're there.

Besides all of that, you really, really do have a lot of maturing left...I know that you're legally an adult, and you're much more mature than you were when you were 12. But that doesn't change the fact that many of us don't finish developing emotionally until we're about 25 (thus the fact that car insurance is more expensive until you get to that age!).

Let yourselves finish growing, and finish up the important things that are in front of you now. Look forward to when you're done with these things, both because you'll be done with them, and because it will be the time to start a new chapter in life, with your marriage.

Answer 4

I would say to wait until after college. If you two are meant to be together, then you will still be together. I always thought my high school sweetheart and I would marry, she broke up with me about 6 months after I graduated and she was still a senior. My first wife and I were together for almost a year and a half before we married and the marriage lasted less than 2 years, less than a year if you count the time she actually stayed in Germany with me. My current wife, and the true love of my life, I dated for about 5 weeks before I popped the question, we were engaged another 7 months and are about to celebrate our 9th anniversary.
So it really depends on the couple, but as young as you are, I would say wait.

Answer 5

Well marriage is something you dont want to run into, but the best time to get married, is once you're both done with school and have a steady job, thats about the right time to get married, plus people who have been dating for 5+ last longer in a marriage than people who get married too soon, plus you'll want to live with your parnter for a year before you get married, so you can adjust to each others habits, that way you dont rush into anything to fast and the marriage will work out :)
Hope this helps.

Answer 6

I think the younger you are the longer you should wait. I think it is not based on age but maturity and with time most people grow up. At 18 you are still fairly young, I say wait until you both are 20 years old.

Here are 10 reasons to wait to get married:

10. You can have better life skills and thus less chance to experience marriage failure

9. Your financial and emotional security is stronger

8. You can have more chance to just be yourself and less chance to counsel someone else for decisions

7. Your maturity, personality and value are much less likely to be questioned

6. You always have more time and energy for careers, education, hobbies or other people you care

5. There is a smaller likelihood to constantly worry about someone else and things related to him or her

4. You can always meet more different people and expand your life experience

3. You have a more peaceful life

2. You will always maintain the hope to find someone better

1. You still can do whatever you want, and whenever

Answer 7

I would at least wait until after college.
That way you both will have a good education under your belt and can start your life off right. Not to mention, there are so many changes and so much growth that you will do between now and college graduation, you both may be very different people. If things are still perfect between you two, then start setting the date then, not now. You'll be glad you waited later.

Answer 8

Well, I think you should get married when:
1- Your mouth smells horrible in the morning and he tells you that this certain thing is what he likes the most at you
2. He plans future involving you
3. You find him looking for the perfect home, just for the two of you
4. You share food: he takes what you do not eat and you take what he does not eat without asking any permission
5. He says "we" often
6. He misses you when you go to the shop
7. You miss him too, but you let him play or watch football with his friends
8. You argue, because it means that you still have different points of view and still have something to share
9. You can't sleep at night without him by your side
10. He looks at you and you still have butterflies
Dear friend, I know that deep down in your soul, you know if marrying him is what you want! Love comes in different ways for each and everyone of us! Nobody can tell you when is the perfect time to get married! You'll know it at the right moment! It is said that " Love is a mistake, but it's a mistake worth making!" Think about! Best regards, Camy

Answer 9

There really is no PERFECT age for marriage and probably since your asking on here your not ready. There is no reason to rush into marriage. Dating can be just as fun. Marriage is a life long commitment that shouldn't be take lightly. Do you love him? Does he love you? If he loves you he will wait until you are were you want to be in life... like college. It's a better idea to finish college first, so that there won't be as many problems in the relationship. Your young and though sometimes when we are young we want to jump into things waiting is sometimes better! Good luck with whatever you do.

Answer 10

mid 20s is a good round about age to get married methinks. have a long engagement and enjoy it. Dont rush into making the arrangements. You're still both very young. I just learnt my old childhood friend got married (shes only 18 too) recently and it was all put together in a VERY short space of time and ive seen the photos- it looks a shambles. Tacky, unorganised and all round mess. Take your time and just enjoy being together. Congrats to yoooo!