Wiccans and Pagans, Are you open with your beliefs or are you in the closet so to speak?

Question

I am open with my beliefs, but stll am careful when and who I tell. I am not blatant about my beliefs, but from time to time religion does come up and I am asked about my beliefs.

Three years ago I went to a bookstore and bought Bucklands, complete Book of Witchcraft by Raymond Buckland and the young man checking me out was trying to make something of my purchase by saying things like, "Hmmm this is an unusal purchase" I just blew it off and said to some maybe, but not to others, then as store policy requires, he asked if I wanted a bag, and as with all my other purshases, I said yes, then he began laughing and asked me if I was ashamed of my purchase, I almost lost it but stayed calm and said, "look I always get a bag and you have checked me out before and gave me a bag without asking me if I was ashamed,I am not ashamed of my faith and you should mind your own business and just do your job okay?"

I live in East Texas and I understand fully about the attitudes we face here. Luckily I don't have any children and my grown ones by another woman turned on me when I was still a Christian so I don't have to worry for my kids and my wife can handle herself, she is a very faithful Christian by the way.

I am unemployed, but depending on where I have worked dictated whether or not I was out or open. I almost applied at the Salvation army, but decided I did not want to hide that well.

Answer 1

I am open in the sense that if anyone asks what religion I am I'm not ashamed to say 'Celtic Pagan.'

I don't walk round with a banner or bring it up in daily conversation all the time-that would be preachy and I leave that to the Christian fundies.

Then again I live in the UK and being a Pagan here seems to be more acceptable than it is in parts of the USA.

Answer 2

I'm definitely "out of the broom closet" and have been for a while. I have a pentacle necklace that I wear openly, and really haven't had much problem with it. There have been a couple of times that I have traded it (or put it on a longer chain so it fell inside my shirt) in order to avoid what I knew would be issues, but those times are few and far between.

If someone asks, I'll talk to them about it. If they don't ask, I don't talk about it. It's not a big deal, nor is it anything to be ashamed of - it's simply a part of who I am. I figure I shouldn't have to hide my faith because of someone else's misconceptions about it. But I'm not "in your face" about it, either.

(I'm in the Dallas area, which is a little bit more metropolitan than East Texas, so the attitudes are a little less conservative.)

Answer 3

What an absolute berk! Good for you to stand up for yourself.

Thankfully in my local book stores there's an entire section devoted the Paganism and new age traditions, so I don't get odd looks, except when I'm buying comics.

For me, I wear a lot of jewelery that has Pagan connotations, like crystal pendants, bangles, earrings, if people pay attention they notice, and in the summer I sometimes have my Celtic tattoos in view. I don't hide what I am, like many Christians I know who wear a cross. But that said I don't say what I am unless asked, then I'm honest, I won't lie or pretend, and I'll say so if it comes up in a conversation.

I'm open with my beliefs, and am very willing to cut off ties if people can't deal with them. I think it's in part that I have other aspects that distinguish me from others that people find more difficult to absorb.

Answer 4

I live in a very rural area and it is better to be quiet about your religion than to buck the Christian status quo. I am very open on the Internet and do my best to try to help people understand Pagans.

Like you I have had some strange reactions about what I believe. I go to a small Walmart locally (it is the closest store and it is 20 miles away, so I have little choice) and there is one clerk who asks me how I am doing and I always say I'm fine. I also say that nobody really wants to hear complaining and her reply is only the devil wants to hear our complaints. I have tired to remember what she looks like to avoid her because I really dislike her desire to preach her beliefs. But unless I want to fight against the Christians, then it isn't worth it. I'm the minority and if I want to live closer to more Pagans I can. But here I am out in the country, I'm very close to the Goddess and I am happy. The anti-Pagan feelings locally doesn't bother me enough to worry.

Answer 5

Although I am open with family about my beliefs - I do not open myself to strangers, acquaintances, and sometimes friends. However, I do not try and cover up my beliefs. If someone asked me straight out, I defiantly wouldn't tell them I'm something I'm really not. But I am cautious in what I say. I honestly don't want to argue, try to enlighten anyone, or explain myself when/if conversion is brought up. People fear what they don't know, no matter how open minded they our. I don't feel it's my job to enlighten everyone I come across. Of course, most people around me are suspect that I'm not mainstream, but they politely keep it to themselves as religion is personal. Of course, I love to talk about it, debate it, but people get heated and mad so I seldom do this with people I know.

As for being targeted when getting products with my non-Christian religion, I mostly get them on line simply because they are cheaper! On the rare occasion I've gotten something from a store, noone's ever said anything and I've never been ashamed - well, take that back - the one time I was approached about my religion while buying a book in public was when I was in Salem, MA and he was a non-Christian as well - quite interesting to talk with.

Answer 6

I am not open with my beliefs because I grew up in a small town in the middle of nowhere, where it was thought of as the worst crime anyone could commit. I don't flaunt it because of that. I feel comfortable with my beliefs now, but I still don't flaunt it and even hide the stuff when my parents visit. Probably subliminal crap from my childhood which makes me do that.

I feel that the forces that be understand my feelings and are Ok with my actions. Although I do know that I get more and more free with who knows the older that I get.

Answer 7

It is really frustrating. I keep my faith close to the vest not because I'm ashamed but because I'm afraid for my kids. I live in a small town in Texas. I can handle the "Thou shall not suffer a witch a live" and the going to hell comments. I can handle the judgment and hate but I REFUSE to subject my daughter to it. I live in fear of the day that she comes home and says "Why do people think you are evil mommy?"
Anyone who I trust enough to be in my life knows what I am. I WISH I could flaunt it like Christians do. But out of fear for my kids I don't. I don't want them to be hurt any sooner then they need to be.
If that was me I would have just told himt o put it in the damn bag before I hexed him. Might as well have some fun with it.

Answer 8

Hey!
I live in a small rural town in central Queensland Australia.......
My bookstore doesn't even carry the sort of books we are discussing here....i have to ask them to order them in for me and you should see the looks i get!!!!
Its quite funny because if i order a book that has nothing to do with witchcraft or Wicca, they will call me to tell me it has come in.....but if i order one of the ones that do.....i never hear from them....its like they don't want to phone a witch!! I find it very amusing!
I decided when i first began to walk this path that i would never have a broom-closet to hide in!! Why should we??
But i never force it onto anyone! That to me would be abhorrent!
I would of lost it with the guy in your store!
Congratulations on your restraint!
Blessed Be!
)O(
~*Ariel*~

Answer 9

Good for you for staying calm. That's as polite as anyone could expect, I hope he learned something.

I'm in the closet at work, but out to my friends... not all members of my family ;-)

I wore a pentacle to a bookstore on the Solstice. A lady walking behind me complemented me on my brightly-colored shirt, and when I turned around to smile and thank her, her eyes went immediately to the pentacle and she suddenly looked uncomfortable. She seemed to want to be somewhere else right then.

I wasn't embarassed, but I felt it was too bad.

Answer 10

I'm like you.. open but with caution.
I don't hide anything, but I'm not big on going around saying "Hey look at me! I'm a witch!" either.

I haven't experienced what you went through at the bookstore, but what a rude clerk! I would've asked immediately for a manager. You handled it much more kindly than I would've.