I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 3 months. We started liking eachother for the past 8 months. So it feels that we've been together longer. I lost my V to him and have fallen in love with him. Unfortuatly he split from his ex girlfriend ,of two years, before we got together but im worried becasue he told me that he loved her. He says that he made a right decision with me and glad that he's with me than her. Wish i should be glad in a way but i cant help wondering if her still thinks about her.
Anyway, i have been spending alot of time with him, and im worried because he's just recently acting diffrent. Not bad... Just not as lovey dovey as he usually is. I wonder if it is becasue we have been with eachother 24/7 and need a little time for ourselves. I just hope he is not begining to get bored of me! so dose absence make the heart grow fonder?? Please help me! thankyou
2007-06-27 09:25:17 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
im not smothering him... i give him his space... he goes out with his mates alot... it feels like im the one stuck indoors.
2007-06-27 10:17:40 · update #1
Sometimes absence does make the heart grow fonder,but i don't recommed the absence to be too long. Because if you're absent for a short time i'll admit, you'll have a strong relationship with that person. but say you're gone for half a year or more, then chances are the spark that you had won't be the same as the first time you met (if you're lucky). But, i don't really think you should worry yourself about his ex, although you should talk to him a little more about her..or at least ask him why he's acting the way he is. Because from what i see, you guys have a great relationship, and i think you need to excercise the fact that this is a open relationship and that, there's really nothing to hide or fret about from one another.
2007-06-27 09:40:04 · answer #1 · answered by Sharon S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, yes, but you have a couple of problems here. First, your boyfriend admitted to you that he still loves his ex. That should have been your key to walk away. If you are giving him sex and companionship, of COURSE he's going to say he "did the right thing" with you, but he's clearly not ready to give you his heart. Someone already has it.
Second, you are with him constantly. You have to leave a man wanting more. If you're there at his beck and call, esp in the beginning, he will without a doubt get bored.
Or, the infatuation phase of the relaitonship could be fading and real life is setting in, meaning he's not going to treat you like a brand new, exciting girlfriend anymore. Not because he doesnt' like you, but because the novelty has worn off.
If I were you, I'd give him some space. You could probably use it too. You don't have to break up, just start going out with your friends a night or two a week, be busy, etc.
Good luck to you.
2007-06-27 09:30:54 · answer #2 · answered by Yogi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you first start dating someone, its normal to want to be around them all the time, but thats only because thats a part of the learning stage, thats when yall are learning each other. But after that stage is up, you already know what to expect from each other and you have probably already done a lot of things. Its not that he is getting bored but who wants to eat the same food everyday. Switch up some activities and give each other some space. Absence does make the heart grow fonder because after a couple of days, you'll be surprised at how much yall will have to talk about. But no one said that it would be easy. And if you mean growing fonder of her, thats only if he allows it to.
2007-06-27 09:36:17 · answer #3 · answered by mizz_toree 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well about his exgirlfreind no matter who you date they will have an ex and you will wonder if they think about them you will never ever know for sure it is an unforatnt fact of dating so you can't focus on it too much or you will drive yourself insane.
and as for him seeming less lovie dovie that may just be becasue you guys have been together for awhile you are moving into a more secure point in your relasionship where he doesn't feel the need to show you how much he loves you ever moment because he knows you know. however you really shouldn't spend 24/7 with him he needs space and YOU need space make sure you get at least 1 night a week for yourself it is important that you do this so you feel like your own person andnot just an extenstion of him.
2007-06-27 09:35:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Emma
give this guy some space... My sister is with someone that had just come out of an 8 year relationship....her relationship with him was very full on at the beginning, then he became distance... so my sister gave him the space the needed, and got on with her life, then after a few weeks he began calling and now they have been together for a few months...he just wanted space to get himself together, spend some time with his friends....
So give your guy a big snog, and tell him you'll call him in a week or so...if he asks why, tell him that you both need a little space to do your own thing.
good luck xx
2007-06-27 09:38:45 · answer #5 · answered by lastofthewonderfullpeople 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i assume you mean his heart grow fonder of her. nah...she's his ex for a reason. hopefully he remembers that most about her. i wouldn't say that you need a break from each other but if you have been together 24/7 for the last 3 months you may need a little time to yourselves.
now does absence make the heart grow fonder when you are in love and are away from each other ...YES!
2007-06-27 09:33:18 · answer #6 · answered by Psalm91 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose it can but often it doesn't. The longer you're apart the more different you become until at some point that person you met no longer exists. People also change while you're with them but since you're each other's strongest influence you often change together.
It actually sounds like you're moving into the next normal step in any relationship. There is always that fiery crazy part in the beginning that mellows over time. It doesn't mean you don't love each other but you can't maintain that initial high with anyone.
2007-06-27 09:29:27 · answer #7 · answered by elurle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're both in love... just not with each other. How many of us are still with the guy we lost our V to? Raise your hands! Anybody?
3 months is nothing. Liking is nothing. He's not in love with you. 24/7? You think maybe you're smothering him? Give that guy some breathing space and just enjoy the good times.
2007-06-27 09:40:04 · answer #8 · answered by magikal01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ANYONE will get sick of being around someone 24/7. Geez...give the guy some room to breath and a chance to miss you. I'd be smothered if someone thought they had to be velcro'd to my hip.
Sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder...and sometimes it's a case of "out of sight, out of mind".
2007-06-27 09:29:12 · answer #9 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The question is does he love her still? Does he have a heart full of regrets? And yes you are spending too much time together- you need things to do separately to give you breathing space.
2007-06-27 09:30:24 · answer #10 · answered by Ellie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋