what do I do. My future husband has a 18 year old daughter.We are getting married in 2 months. She pretty much demanded that she be invited to the wedding. Well her and I dont get along because she blames me for her moving with her mom. His ex wants to come to our wedding with the daughter what do I do?
2007-06-27 08:19:41 · 14 answers · asked by Lisa m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Tell her she can come. It could help build a bridge between the two of you. But have your man tell her AND her mother that under NO circumstances are they to do anything catty or mean to ruin the day, and if they are caught doing so they will be asked to leave.
The daughter is an adult, and should know better. If they can't act like adults, they shouldn't be there.
2007-06-27 08:22:55 · answer #1 · answered by misguidedrose18 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would be a terrible slap in the face not to have his daughter to the wedding. It is only right she be there, but he must warn her, no shenanigans.
Since the daughter is 18, the ex-wife can be ignored for an invitation. If the daughter were younger like 12, you would have to hold your nose and have her, but not with an adult daughter. There will be fewer times when your new husband will have to make nice with his ex.
2007-06-27 15:44:53 · answer #2 · answered by danashelchan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She shouldn't have to "demand" to be at the wedding. She's his DAUGHTER. She should be invited (if not in the wedding party) anyways.
Please don't become a "step-monster". Try and make things work with your future husbands daughter. She'll be a part of your life whether you want her to be or not now, you might as well make it a good part.
2007-06-27 15:29:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would invite the daughter, but not the ex unless you are comfortable with his ex being there. Make sure your future husband knows how you feel and that you two present a united front. Tell his daughter you want her to come (even if you don't really - you have to understand she will be apart of your family from now on), but make it clear to her that she is to act with respect.
2007-06-27 15:33:11 · answer #4 · answered by Rahrah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His daughter should be there. His ex-wife should not.
It doesn't matter if you get along with his daughter or not. She's his daughter. End of story.
I can't think of any case where an ex-spouse should be at the wedding. Your fiance needs to tell his ex-wife that she is not invited, either directly or as a guest of his daughter.
2007-06-27 16:16:40 · answer #5 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The daughter should have every right to attend her fathers wedding.. However by under no circumstances should the Ex be allowed to attend. If the daughter wont attend cause her mother isn't allowed to attend then that's not your problem. and it's not your fault. If your soon to be hubby insists then it's your job to make him realize how disrespectful this is..
I am so sorry that you have to deal with such drama.. Wedding should be about happiness not stress and family issues. Best of luck :)
2007-06-27 15:36:07 · answer #6 · answered by Shannon C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had better figure out how to get along with his daughter because to do otherwise would be very disrespectful to your future husband! She will always be a major part of his life and you need to be mature enough to deal with it! I don't blame her for wanting to be at her father's wedding. And if her mother accompanies her, no big deal. Sometimes it's best to not make a big deal out of a small issue.
2007-06-27 15:28:27 · answer #7 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG, how selfish. You need to invite his daughter. Even if you two don't get along, that is her father. She is a young girl, who's parents are divorced, it's extremely stressful. She might blame you for things b/c there is a lot going in her life that she CAN NOT control. She needs someone to blame. It's hurtful to you, but you need to be understanding.
If you don't invite her, you could cause alienation and tension between her and her father. Do you want to the cause of that.
Invite her!!!
2007-06-27 15:42:38 · answer #8 · answered by Answer Girl 2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The daughter needs to be able to come but the mother CAN NOT come! That is extremely rude and puts everyone in a very uncomfortable position!!! You or your future husband (or both) need to explain this to both of them. It may make it easier if your husband does it. There will be other relatives on your husbands side of the family there that the daughter will know so she needs to deal without her mother there. Put your foot down!
2007-06-27 15:30:38 · answer #9 · answered by Des 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, someone here needs to be the adult. You stand your ground as his wife (once you get married) and your husband need to make it clear that you aren't going anywhere. And whether you like it or not neither is his daughter or his ex! Someone needs to be mature about this. Continue to love her dad, show her and her mom respect regardless and she will come around. If not, it's her problem to deal with you being there. Let them come to the wedding! What's wrong with that. Both will see this is a binding love that neither of them can break! Good luck and Congrats!
2007-06-27 15:26:52 · answer #10 · answered by faikeijames 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋