Please understand the question....There is little physical or emotional comfort from grief?

Question

Part of living is surviving the death of a loved one. No matter how we try we can’t get around the aching, the pining and the loneliness.
The loss of a parent, a child, a spouse or a friend can devastate us. In our loss, it's often difficult to find comfort or understanding..AS an ATHEIST I am guessing most of you might say to a person suffering from this..I am sorry, if there is anything I can do for you, please let me know..That's nice but little comfort when a person is suffering.
THIS IS THE TRUTH-The awful truth is that nothing will make your grief go away and it may go on for a very long time. The comforting truth is that God is there to help you and sustain you through it. Reach out and take His hand. Let Him hold you and carry you through this. “Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you.” (James 4:8a KJV)

If you think you or another human being is capable of doing what most people find only in the comfort of GOD then why not present it to SOCIETY?

Answer 1

You are right... there is little that a person can do for one who is grieving. We can show empathy and understanding, being there for them if needed... but for the most part it is an internal anguish that simply takes time to heal. Misery does not always want company.

God does comfort the grieving... I can personally testify to that as fact. I lost my first wife in a car accident, and a good friend a week later. He was murdered hitchhiking his way home after hitching out to be with me because of my wife dying. It is impossible to describe the intensity of this grief.

One morning, waking with dread for another day, I made a heartfelt cry to God... I was at the "end of my rope". He answered. I was not a Christian at the time and really thought it was God. What transpired is beyond words... It is like some of that experience is blocked from my memory, but I know He answered every question I had. The end result was that the anguish and despair was totally gone, vanquished. I still have sadness in my heart, even today when I think of them, but not the grief.

Today, I know that even as a unbeliever, He had sent an angel to minister to me. God does answer prayer. The peace and joy in my heart lasted for weeks. I do remember the last question I had asked, and the answer. The question was "but, why??" The answer.... "LOVE".

There was a vision that accompanied this reply. I was transported to place, a dark void of immense space. In the midst of this was this small point of light. As I was waiting for the answer, this light grew in size and intensity, along with the intensity of the feelings within me. As the intensity became unbearable, the soft one word answer caused the light to expand quickly, nova like, spreading out into the vastness, along with the release of the intensity within me. I simply knew that it was not of me, but God's love was flowing out and through me, along with the light, in all directions. There was such joy and peace.. and it stayed with me. He is an awesome God, who loves us, and cares for us, and is concerned with every detail of our lives. I hope this helps someone... God bless.

Answer 2

When I've gone through the grief of the death of a loved one, nothing comforts me like being held by another loved one or playing with my kids or holding a baby, these are all affirmations that life continues.

I can honestly say that "God" offered very little comfort in these times or during others when I was in deep travail.

Edit:
As an aside, I'm not sure that I want comfort from a deity that essentially abandoned the entire world and countless humans while he was dealing only with his chosen people.

Answer 3

Suffering in Life is inevitable.
Grief is a process. The process is the means in which comfort & understanding may be obtained. Consider the acronym, S.A.R.A.H. -- Shock, Anger, Rejection, Acceptance, Healing. In order to continue to be productive after suffering a loss, a person must meet SARAH. Grief provides emotional/psychological & physical strength and comfort to us.

Understanding that the people & resources of life are the means in which God provides comfort to us. Comfort comes in many different forms. Sometimes, it may mean 'just a listening ear' or 'I'm there to be of any assistance for you' or it may be a bird singing. Yes, God has said He'll supply all of our needs -- no matter what they are or whether they are emotional or physical.

Maybe we would be better to let God be God.-- not presume that God provides for the needs of men/women in only one way.

Answer 4

Speaking as a mom who HAS lost a child....there is nothing anyone can say that is comforting. It's a personal thing that only you can work through yourself. Actually, those who just give a hug and say nothing are the most comforting.
As a church attending person myself, "God's will" was the hardest thing for me to work through. So please....don't try to say anything...it most always will be the wrong thing to say, we'll find something wrong with it, even if it isn't meant that way. Just be there, give a hug. And by the way....Saying "If there is anything I can do" is more helpful than you may think. Maybe just going to the post office to get our mail is what we need at that moment.

Answer 5

I lost my son last month. Even as a goddess christian there is NO comfort in the thinking that he is in a 'better' place. It is a loss, and yes, you are right in saying there is nothing that will make the grief go away. Please dont tell me to reach out for God's hand. It appears from your statements you really have never experienced real loss or had to go through an actual grieving process

Answer 6

I'm sorry but no that is not the truth. You are delusional and worship an imaginary being. You quote scriptures like it's evidence to your testimony. That does nothing to help you in your delusional cause but nice try.

It's a good thing that YOUR GOD helps in the comforting during hard times. Considering so many of YOUR GOD'S children die fighting wars using YOUR GOD as justification.

You want to know what atheist offer to society and that is a good question. Atheist offer only what they have in reality. Not something that is based around an imaginary being. Therefore any and all comfort provided by an atheist is genuine.

One of the best things about using the your bible is the promise of heaven. It's so much easier to convince a soldier to die when he believes he's going to enter some magical paradise.

I wonder what they did during the old testament times. When you would be murdered for being gay.
If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what it detestable. They must be put to death. -Leviticus20:13
Would YOUR GOD'S word help his grieving families cope with their tragic loss?

I would rather burn in hell for eternity than spend it worshipping a brutal, sexist, pro-slavery, anti gay,genocidal, dictator. Lucky for me I know there is no such thing as YOUR GOD and hell.

Again nice try though...

Answer 7

Why not believe in God(s)? There is no proof? Well don't some scientists believe over 60% of the matter in the universe is "dark matter," even though they don't know what it is, only seen the effects (like unexplainable movement of things in space as if by gravity). So they proposed a cause for it, dark matter. Forgive me if it's wrong, i've never even looked into the subject >_>. That aside, one could be strongly agaisnt grieving for the dead. 1. How do you know that it isn't better to be dead (or they prefer it)? They are released of all their hassles, worries, and suffering and are now relaxed. 2. One could say grieving is purely a selfish thing. As Khrisnamuti beleives, you grieve for the dead because YOU want to continue YOUR relation with them. Notice, it isn't for the good of them. And also to further selfishness, would the dead person HONESTLY want you to be sad? I think anyone that even REMOTELY likes you, wouldn't want u to be sad, and instead be happy.

Answer 8

As someone who suffered the death of a parent, grandparent, several friends, a cousin, the infant child of another friend, and a woman I loved, I will say that not once during any of those times was there any comfort more precious to me than that given to me by my friends who offered their condolences and support. I cannot conceive how a false belief will make things any better than the sure knowledge that there are people around me who care.

Answer 9

This is the second question you have asked which tries to promote Christianity due to the fact that it can offer comfort to those who believe.

Can you not just accept that many people have found a way to go though life secure and happy without believing in god?

Lots of things offer comfort, it does not mean they are right.

Answer 10

It is the BELIEF in god and the stories of 'a better place' which is comforting. This is true whether there is a god or not.

People want a 'lifeline' in their grief to try to hold on to their sanity. Religion is one of the ways that this can be supplied. Another way is to actually deal with the grief.