Obviously I would never drop it on someone who had their hands full, or a mother with little kids, or an old person. It drives me nuts, though, when people don't say "Thanks", or even give you a smile. Especially when going through double doors, I've been known to drop the doors in people's faces. What do you think- should I hold it anyway, or do they deserve it? What do you do?
2007-06-27 03:56:46 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
If they don't acknowledge me holding the door for them, sometimes I'll say loudly "You're welcome." Mostly I don't say anything... I just appreciate it all the more when someone does show courtesy back with a "thanks."
2007-06-27 04:02:13 · answer #1 · answered by TC 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
No. You should hold it either way. It is a general responsibility. If one person holds a door for someone, it is one better person in the world. If every one held the door for another person, the world would be a much better place. And who knows, they may just be having a rough day. If you hold the door, they may not acknowledge it, but inside I am sure they appreciate it. Maybe I will hold the door for you some day, who knows. There may have been a time when you did not smile or say thanks, and you just don't remember.
2007-06-27 11:06:09 · answer #2 · answered by SFT 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have experienced this reaction too many times, but I think that I have the solution.
The reason that I hold the door for the person behind me is that it is proper etiquette. I feel better as a person for holding a door, helping someone with parcels, giving directions, etc. If holding the door for someone is not a courtesy, I don't know what is, then.
So, if they refuse to exchange courtesies with a proper "thank you", please keep it in mind why you held the door....you did it to exercise your good manners and thoughfulness, not for a reward. Sure they are rude to ignore you, but don't be rude back!! That means that your good manners have slipped and you are now working at their level of etiquette, NONE. God forbid!
Keep on showing compassion for others, your reward is waiting for you in the end. Peace
2007-06-27 11:23:57 · answer #3 · answered by joe_on_drums 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I remember, one day, holding the door open for this guy, who just sailed through. I did say in a loud voice You're welcome'...well he came back to me and profusely apologised for being so rude, he'd had bad news that day and his mind was on other things....how bad did I feel. I guess that would be a one off, some people are rude,but sometimes ppl do have things going on, and they may not realise it.
2007-06-27 18:28:34 · answer #4 · answered by lisa x 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have this question the wrong way around
Its not about them saying thank you its about you knowing you did the right thing...
So I would hold the door open for anyone, at least that way I can be secure that I did the polite thing and helped people, that means their appreciation or lack thereof be on their head, no need to do something as immature or nasty as letting it close on them, wether they be a kid, holding a baby, or someone you see as vulnerable or not... and yes even some annoying narcissistic (sp?) person ...
2007-06-27 11:03:08 · answer #5 · answered by ForgeAus 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I do understand your frustration.
However, you are opening the door as a courtesy - You are being kind. Why let the other person's response ruin your good deed?
I don't want to let people control me that way. If they don't respond with a thanks (and they should!) - it's their problem. I'm not going to make it mine!
I would also suggest not taking it so personally - I've probably done it and forgotten!
2007-06-27 11:06:49 · answer #6 · answered by fanofchan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I always say a polite "you're welcome."
They usually get embarrassed enough to thank me. Maybe the thank you won't really mean anything, but hopefully they'll remember to thank the next person that holds the door for them.
2007-06-27 11:01:08 · answer #7 · answered by gopher646 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I just kindly say "YOU'RE WELCOME!!!" in a really nice voice... I'm obviously not being paid to hold the door open for them and the least they can do is say thank you... doing it this way usually gets the thank you out of them and sometimes embarrasses them a little...which is nice considering how rude they are. :)
2007-06-27 12:36:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't let it go, but I believe it is common courtesy to just say thanks. I hate when you are holding it and they act like you are holding it for them and they walk thru verses holding it open for the next person behind them. This happens alot at the movies or mall. I'm like I wasn't holding it for you jerk. too bad it's only a thought and not spoken out loud.
2007-06-27 11:02:56 · answer #9 · answered by Libragirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not if its a child, no - they don't necessarily know that they should say thank you (although, in my experience, they're more polite than adults).
Other than that, I have been known to shut it on people and say the wind caught it or, even more frequently, shout after them "That's alright!"
2007-06-27 11:14:07 · answer #10 · answered by Devolution 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep the door open. It just proves that you are being the bigger person. It's a polite thing to do. If they don't say 'thank you' then they're just being inconsiderate. In the end, karma will bite them in the ***.
2007-06-27 11:02:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anna M 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋