Confusion with my ex girlfriend ... Help me with this please ..?

Question

so ... me and my ex girlfriend broke up last month for no clear reason, she just told me " I'm not ready for commitment, summer is cominq up.. and beinq sinqle sounds real good right now .] We didn't have any problems or anythinq while in the relationship ... we liked each other for a whole year but we lost contact, and we found each other and got together.. from the very first time we kissed we knew it was meant to be ..

After we broke up.. it's been hard because it's like we can't have a conversation without almost arguing .. so I told her "I think it's best if I just leave you alone, it seems as if we talk we are gunna fight.. and I dont want that so im fall back." and she was mad when I said this to her..

She also told my friend "I dont think I would go back out with him." [talking about me.] and told him that she's "feeling" someone else.. but doesn't like him at all..

How is she feeling? Is she putting up a front to hide her true feelings? I really want her back. HELP!

Her message to me on Myspace :

Babyy-

---I wanna start off by saying I love you. I love every little thing you do....The way you look at me. The way you treat me infront of everyone. The way you just are. Your truly more then my boyfriend. Your like my bestfriend. Someone I can tell anything to, and you won't judge me, you'll be there to listen and comfort me. Not only are you my boyfriend, and my bestfriend but your my everything. Your why I wake up in the morning and wanna go to school. Your why I'm forever having a smile on my face all the time now. You make me feel like I'm something when I always thought so low of myself. I trust you with everything I have. And I know your one who won't break that trust. I wished last year we told each other how we felt, but it doesn't really matter, because I'm here now, and I'm here to stay forever. I love you Christopher . Seriously I love you. [A note she wrote to me a week before it ended.]

Your one of those special people to me, and I thank you. I thank you for putting up with my bi polar *** nd the way i get so aggrevated so fast. And thank you for willing to stick around. And I wanna apologize now inadvance just in case this relationship ever gets hard. Promise me you won't ever give up on us. And ull be willing to get threw with w.e we are going threw.

I love you so much Christopher. Seriously. I love you.

Christopher - My Bestfriend, My Boyfriend, My Life, My World, My Everything

Those basically sum everything up ! It's like i'm feeling your feelings, you make my day ! All these notes we write to each other make me smile, giggle, and say AWE out loud! hehe. We arent going to argue, I promise ! and if we happen to slip up and argue, we'll realize it's over nothing and there's no need to argue ! We don't ever disagree on things.

Never is us breaking up going to happen ! I would be so depressed, and I wouldnt be able to sleep at night ! But anyways, I don't have to worry about that because I know it wont ever happen.

I trust you with everything! and I know you trust me.. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you ! Your amazing ! I love you !

We are lasting forever! We can do this for Jaeden & Miyah [ <- what she named our "future kids"]

Those were her notes to me .. like a week before it ended.

Answer 1

Sounds like you guys are quite young... Take a summer break, and have fun... Although she loves you she needs some space and she's trying to let you go gently.. Contact her periodicallly and let her know you are still around, but don't be all needy and obnoxious... If it's meant to be it's meant to be....

Answer 2

Sounds like love from a young girl who has not yet experienced life enough to know what loving someone really means. She feels she cares and loves you, then on the other hand, she is young and wants to go out and have fun. The tough thing here is that she is struggling with not being able to have it both ways. You both sound so young, why the rush for love? You both still have your whole life ahead of you. This is the time to plan for the future by getting an education, to experience meeting new people, to venture your days on learning all you can about life. I know, I sound like your parents, but one day you are gonna look back and remember my advice, for now, I can only pray you take it. Otherwise, get ready for heartache, for even though the young are able to feel love, to sustain it takes maturity and experience. Either way, I do wish you the very best.

Answer 3

Man............. that note is a killer!

Breaking up with someone because its summer. Honestly, that's a new one by me. I've been dumped for dumber reasons, so there you go.

Let me put it to you this way. She says that you were her best friend, right? But a best friend wouldn't treat you this way. A best friend wouldn't dump you because she thinks its cool to be single during the summer.

Frankly, you are better off without her. She's shown you that she isn't a friend, let alone a girlfriend. She may have done you a favor by ending it now.... and letting YOU enjoy your summer being single.

I would suggest that you focus on your true friends. Go hang out with your buddies... go to movies... do whatever it is you do during the summer where you live. Go to the lake/beach/ocean. Go to a concert. Have some fun.

You will miss her............. that's normal........... but waiting for her to decide that she wants you back isn't a good way to be. Seems like she is moving on......... its time you did that too. Delete the myspace messages... they are too hard to read while your heart is healing.

Good luck to you.........

Answer 4

No offense dude - I think she playing some emotional games with you without reserve - and shes hooked you big style.

If she screws around always got a good reason - its not me its the bi-polar. I had a woman once say something along those lines to me like she was proud of - told me about her husabnd - then asked to sleep with me - wat do you think I told her - your beyond reproach, you ahve no decencey and you know damn well wat your doin - your not doin this cos your mentally unwell - this for you is your excuse, your reason if you will. go find a boy - Im a man.

Yea she'll keep with you dude - your stable and you'll let her do what she wants -and you'll be the one that feels like rubbish.she sounds narcassitic to me, maybe she is bi polar too. shes even makin sure u hear about this - via your friends. but not to you. shes keeping you in doubt, and trying to drive a wedge between you and your frineds - soon I bet your family too.

You will end up loosing your head in this and trying to be the best man you can - and it will be for nothing - dont do this to your self dude -too many good men get screwed this way. And the women that wonder why there aint that many decent blokes out there - this dont help.

Head games dude - head games - no one wins all are vulnerable to it. dont play the game - walk away. it'll hurt you - better than hurting you and your friends and your family too in the long run - show you ahve care for those that care for you and none for those that seek to mess it all up.

So let her go - let her have her summer - and dont be there in the winter.

But in the end - you ahve to do what you ahve to do. good luck

Answer 5

You're assumptions to avoid her were correct. As hard as it is, do your best not to talk to or communicate with her. You need a nice long break from contact with her, then maybe, you can have normal conversations.
Sounds to me like she just wants to be single for the summer so she can have fun and not feel guilty about it. To me, her reasoning sounds very selfish and conceded. It's going to hurt and your going to be sad. Time will heal. You just need to let her go, she's not good enough for you.

Answer 6

You need to find a way to get her back - obviously she cares about u still and is trying to hide it cause she wants you to be jealous for a while to make sure u truly care about her. Wat she told u before u broke up could not be a lie and she truly loves u. Right now something is going on in her head that's stoping her and confusing her. You need to calmly talk to her with out getting into a fight and figure out wats going on in her mind so u 2 can move on. I use to have wat u had and now I'm not so sure. Good Luck

Answer 7

I think she is young and confused. She has people telling her to be young and single, but she really likes you. I would try to be her friend and let her make up her mind. Let her know that you would love to get back with her, but you are going to leave it up to her. Let her come back on her terms. If she doesn't come back move on. Good luck.

Answer 8

Just move on. You can't get a girl back after she has made up her mind to leave you.

She probably doesn't know what she wants, and in the meantime, while she figures it out, you will just keep getting hurt.

Answer 9

The best thing is to just tell her how you truly feel about her. (make sure this is in private cus you dont want people listening in) i mean what can go wrong

Answer 10

It looks like she wants to have a $lutty summer. Just let her go...let her have her fun she obviously isn't interested in a relationship, so don't waste anymore energy on her