I invited a friend to my wedding and only her, but she invited her mother&sister how do i tell her no one else

Question

She also wants to bring her 4 month old daughter, which i already told her no children. How do i tell her that her sister and mother weren't invited? I'm paying out of pocket and can not afford more then i planned on.

The only reason children aren't invited is because it's an open bar, and i'm being responsible enough not to have children around, expectually a 4 month old, my friend, her mom and her sister would all be drinking. The invitation said To Ms Jane Doe. Thats it no one else. Also I only have a $2000 budget, Only 45 people are invited, very close friends and family.

Answer 1

Just tell her that you have Budgetted for a certain number.Nowadays weddings are expensive. If she's a good friend she'll understand. If she doesn't, invite someone else. Have a happy wedding, and Good Luck!

Answer 2

Not an easy one.

I guess you could say something like "so glad you are bringing your sister and mum along to the ceremony - I just wish we had the resources to have been able to let our guests invite others to the reception afterwards as well (which is usually the only bit that costs more the larger the number of people)

If she doesn't instantly cotton on that she is NOT invited, you could take it one stage further and ask her directly, " Are you missing the reception as well as your sister and mother so you can go home with them - or are you arranging a taxi for them so you can stay to the reception we have invited you to?"

As for the daughter, you could simply say something like "I gather you are thinking of bringing a 4 month old along - please understand that we have made it VERY clear to everyone that children are NOT invited - and as such, much as I would love to make an exception for you, the other guests would feel I had been most unfair - and my fiance and I decided we wanted it to be strictly adults only.

You could sharpen or soften the delivery of either of these things to suit your needs.

These sort of "situations" are difficult - mostly because people hate being assertive for fear of giving offence. HOWEVER it needs to be taken into account that it is only because the person acted rudely in ignoring your limitations and request for no children etc, that it has become necessary to be direct.

Another option for you would be to again be very blunt. Deal with the daughter issue however you choose but then say. As my fiance and I invited you, it will obviously be our pleasure to fund your dinner. As for other people that you want to invite, could you please let me have £ 49 each by Tuesday so I can get their catering sorted out too please.

I am not sure if there is a REALLY gentle way of doing this, but the last option at least spells out that SHE is invited - and paid for - but also that PROVIDING they pay, she can bring along others too. I know that is NOT what you want, but I suspect the idea of forking out £/$ is going to quickly stop that little bit of nonsense quite quickly.

Mark

Answer 3

theres no nice way of doing this. Just sit down and be honest. Tell her that you don't want to be rude but the invitation is for people close to you, in other words not her sister and mother. Also say that if you let her bring her family then every1 else in the wedding will want to do the same so you have to make it rule for every1 and no special treatment. Besides its your wedding you should decide who's in and who's not. And come on let her bring her daughter man. But its ure call. Say it nicely but be firm, you don't want to have a bitter spat about it especially since ure getting married so u shudnt haf to lose a frewn in the process. Gud luck! Never easy to tell ure frewns these kind of things. And if she does not accept and goes and bitches bout it, well u''l knoe den tht she wasnt a real frewn.

Answer 4

first of all, i've got faith your frustration. i could propose no longer asserting something to them, and not sending them an invite. After the marriage, deliver out "wedding ceremony bulletins", that are enjoying cards asserting which you and your better half have been married on in spite of date, comprise your well known wedding ceremony image and your new handle. Use a respond handle sticky label with your new married call on the outdoors of the envelope. this way, even people who weren't invited or waiting to attend your wedding ceremony could have a image to maintain. If one in each and every of those college human beings asks you directly approximately going to the marriage, tell them you're sorry, besides the indisputable fact that that's an exceedingly small prompt family individuals rite and reception, yet you would be chuffed to share the photographs with them afterwards.

Answer 5

She is being rude. Obviously there is a reason your invitation only had her name on it. If she wanted to invite others SHE should have been the one to offer to pay for additional guests and she should have have put you in a position to have to tell her no. On inviting her 4 month old baby, here she is totally ignoring what you say. She's being rude.

Answer 6

Just call her and thank her for taking time to come to your wedding. Then tell her, there is a slight misunderstanding and that your invitation did not include her mother, sister and baby. Seal the deal by saying "As much as I would love for everyone to be able to share in my special day, my budget is severely limited and I have to limit my guest list to very close friends and family."

Answer 7

You should tell her exactly what you are telling us. That you are paying out of pocket and you can't afford it. If she wants fork up the extra dough than that is fine but you are on a budget. My wife and I went through the exact same thing when we got married a year ago. People don't seem to realize how expensive wedding are these days. Congratulations. Peace and God bless.

Answer 8

Just tell her something like: you already ordered a specific amount of catered food and can't go back to add more food. Make it sound as though it has to do more with planning then you, that way it does not sound rude. You can indirectly mention the no-kid thing, but if she doesn't get it then just let her know that no kids are allowed and that it's nothing personal but you don't think it's fair to tell other people not to bring kids but allow her to bring her child. Good Luck!

Answer 9

If the invitation was only addressed to her -- then she is the only one that should come. I think she should respet your wishes for no children -- this allows her the freedom to enjoy the wedding without having to amuse her daughter. Gently explain to her that you are limited to the number of guests that you can have attend. A true friend will honor your requests.

Answer 10

It's your day. You said no children then no children should be allowed to attend. Tactfully tell your friend that you are having a small wedding and only family and friends are attending. The invitation was meant only for her.