Question for the athiests out there?

Question

Today I'm sitting there with my aunt (she has been more like my grandmother and pretty much the only person that I've known in my family other then my parents and her kids) who I love dearly and she is a Christian and starts raving about Christianity and this and that how gay people are an abomination and this and that and how her religion is the truth. Anyway I found myself thinking of her differently I have never known her to speak this way about people and here she is saying all these people are going to hell. I would never take this from anyone else not even other family members but somehow it's different with her is there anyone that you over look things just because of who they are to you? Normally I'd sit there and argue till I was blue in the face.

Tsimay thanks for an example next time someone asks why Atheists answer questions when they say question for Christians.

Thanks a lot everyone for making me feel a bit better about it I was just kinda feeling a bit down because I didn't speak up it's just not normally like me I don't like to see people judge others especially based on religion, race or sexual orientation. With her I just know she's set in her ways and I won't change her way of thinking kind of makes me sad but I think it's about 60 years of her being brainwashed.

Answer 1

I try to humor old people who don't know any better. Many of them were racist and had to break the habit to adapt to modern society - homophobia seems like the only bigotry they can still hold on to in some places. Just feel bad for her.

Answer 2

I know just what you mean. My grandfather is a Irish/German Roman Catholic who grew up around the German-American Bund as a kid: (Read this if you want to be sickened. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German-American_Bund)
The man is 80 years old and thrives on his hatred of anyone who isn't like him. You know, usual suspects anyone who Bill O'Reilly doesn't like - Liberals, Foreigners, Non-Catholic Christians, Jews, any other religion, Puerto Ricans, Communists, Hilary, gays (which is ironic since one of his daughters is a lesbian), etc.
The thing is, he's 80. He's not going to change. He's a miserable bastard. There's no debating him or trying to make him see a different point of view or trying to talk sense into him.
So I pretty much ignore him. As a person I think he's a horrible human being, but I tolerate him because what other choice do I have?
And don't even get me started on what it's like being with him in a restaurant:
(Loud voice.) "Hey, what's up with this Puerto Rican we have waiting our table? He's as fat as that guy at the other table, I tell ya. It's all because Clinton let 'em in here. Him and the other liberals and Communists."

Answer 3

Well, I'm not an atheist, but I think it's best to just stay quiet and tune out when she does that. I know it can be hard, but some people are just so deeply rooted in their ways that they cannot see anything beyond that, even if their ways are illogical. They may even see the faulty logic in their beliefs, but brush that off, saying that "God's way is higher than ours," or something like that.

Besides, when she's gone, that will probably be a way of remembering her.

Answer 4

Oh, I know what you mean. I go through this with my fiance's mom. She's a nice lady and all, but she's a Born-Again Evangelical and never lets an opportunity pass to condemn gays, Jews, etc, to burn. She's one of those who thinks that Christians can't even be friends with other faiths. I too would normally argue, but it's easier to just nod, and think about other things while she yaps. If you knew how many times I've had to hear the "unequally yolked" speech... Fortunately, her son doesn't think like she does.

Answer 5

The only thing I saw wrong there was the 'going to hell' part. Sinners do not go to hell after death, they are resurrected, judged, then either live forever or experience the second death, which is a spiritual one.
God is merciful and just being gay is not a reason to say someone will experience the second death.

Ask your Aunt. If people go to Heaven or Hell when they die, what is the point of Judgement day? Fire and brimstone preachers hate that one.

And, there is no exclusive questioning on Y!A. We all just want our two points and love it when you do not pay attention enough that our 1 vote gets best answer. :P

Answer 6

I face that a lot with my old patients (I'm a nurse). They ask me to pray with them or listen to their rants about how everyone but them is going to hell, etc, ad infinitum. You know what? I really don't care. They believe what they believe. At that age, you're not going to alter their way of seeing the world. And I agree, it can, within a narrow interpretation, make one look like a hypocrite, but since I never really agree (I say "I see," a lot) I don't see it as hypocrisy.
Your best bet: Nod like you agree, let her rant, and don't say anything. Her beliefs keep her from feeling fearful, since it's near the end of her life, so let her have them. You're obviously comfortable with your beliefs.

Answer 7

I've learned over the years to ignore my Fundie brother even though he is not as vocal (to me anyway) as your aunt. It may come to a head someday because he has a 10 year old son who if allowed would be quite effeminate in many ways and may or may not turn out to be gay.

Answer 8

If you think it would hurt her to argue with her then don't. It won't make you feel better. Just know that she's entitled to her own opinion, like you, and that you disagree. Don't take it personally. Sometimes, even people we love are stupid. What can you do? Grin and bear it.
But,... if you think there is some chance that you may open her mind by informing her, or helping her see the errors in her judgment... maybe it is worth it to speak up.
Good luck.

Answer 9

Yes of course. I have a very hard time saying "no" to my grandmother about anything. Now, she'd never hurt me or anything and is quite a wonderful lady that I love dearly but, somehow, its very hard to deny her anything she asks even if I vehemently disagree with her about something.

Answer 10

I leave it go with older people just because you aren't going to change them. The only way I would bother is if there was an outside audience, but even then I would be reluctant.