We live in an apartment building...a very unfortunate place when you have a two year old. We moved in when we got married, pre-baby. From the first week we were moved in, the lady downstairs has complained we make too much noise. She claims we were moving furniture around and waking her up at 3am, but at the time we moved in, we had no furniture! She has been up pounding on our door at least three times a week for almost three years. Now she is starting to complain about the noise our son makes. While I sympathize that having noise from upstairs can be hard to deal with, she has demanded that we tell our two year old to not run, not to play between the hours of 7pm and 9am, and that he not cry at all. It is a small apartment, and we can't afford to move. I take my son to the park as often as possible to get his energy out, but I feel that a toddler can't help but play, and he doesn't yet understand about disturbing people downstairs.
2007-06-26 03:44:49 · 12 answers · asked by granola.tree 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would also like to point out that her husband has taken down the celling in their apartment and build closets (it's a very old building...built in 1920) between their celling and our floor. I think this only adds to an echo effect making the noise greater in their apartment.
How can I get this lady to leave us alone and to understand that we can't always make sure our toddler dosen't make any noise???
2007-06-26 03:46:45 · update #1
Buy her some ear plugs, tell her you don't mean to offend her but that this is an apartment if you don't want the noises move to a house on a farm far aways from everything.
Give her the ear plugs. Say Look I am sorry but there is nothing I can do about it.
I sure feel sorry for you. This is just another one of those people who are unhappy with life and want to take it out on anyone. If you were not there it would be something else. Buy her the ear plugs and if you really want to go even farther like I have done make her some cookies or a pie. I did this and my neighbor cried and never complain again.
Children will always make noise. I do and I not even a child.
Please don't let this bother you Hun. (((HUGS)))
2007-06-26 04:46:37 · answer #1 · answered by Chhaya05 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You can always complain to the landlord about her or just flat out cuss her out. I personally prefer the latter, however the best thing you can do in this situation is to start being very assertive when she comes upstairs with her nasty attitude. My thing is if the kids aren't being destructive then tough. Noise happens in an apartment and you can only apologize but so many times.
And you're going to have to move. I suggest for the next year, just saving up for a first floor apartment or a starter home. Neither one of you are going to find any peace unless someone leaves.
2007-06-26 12:27:30 · answer #2 · answered by King H 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
In my opinion, the best and most kind thing would be to constantly sympathize with her and apologize for the noise that you make (whenever she complains), but to live no differently than you normally do.
Don't make unnecessary noise, but just continually remind yourself that she is not a reasonable person, and that you are doing the best you can.
In other words, don't ever be disagreeable to her (you have no idea what her life is like) but just live your own life as you see fit, as you sound like a considerate person.
Also, you are under no obligation to open your door to any disagreeable person. Put in a peephole, and if you see that it's her (if indeed she is knocking 3 times a week), then find something else to do rather than engage with an unpleasant and unreasonable person, nor should you expose your young child to this type of person.
2007-06-26 11:28:44 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you are sorry, but your child has the right to walk around, play and even the right to cry. He is in his own home, for heaven's sake!
Complain about her to your landlord. If she comes to complain unfairly at an unreasonable hour and if the landlord hasn't fixed the problem, you could call the police. She is, after all, disturbing you, too.
I can understand her side, a little bit. People upstairs from my kid's apartment had 2 cats. It was even loud when the cats ran & chased each other! But, my kid didn't complain. It was the cats' house, too.
2007-06-26 11:14:11 · answer #4 · answered by kiwi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just tell her that you are sorry, but you can't do anything about the little bit of noise that your son makes, but assure her that it will be kept quiet during the late and early hours, but kids are kids and he is going to make some noise. I would also recommend to you to get a rug with a thick carpet pad (if you haven't done so already) to help minimize some of the sound. Ask other neighbors if they are bothered by your son or you and your husband, if others have problems you will know it is you, if others do not have a problem then you will know it is HER. If she continues to harass you and your family I would suggest talking to the management of the building.
2007-06-26 10:59:45 · answer #5 · answered by deerogre 4 · 6⤊ 0⤋
All human beings like to live in peace. But it is unfortunate that due to lack of understanding and tolerance and due to difference in mind set... we the human beings create problems to ourselves and to others. I can understand your situation... it must be a sweet family of two and one baby.
Probably when you say you didn't have any furniture when you moved in. You must have furniture later on at least...
Cot.. Dining Table and chairs etc. at least. If such furnitures are dragged in odd hours of night say sleeping time ... that will surely irritate others after tolerating for a reasonable period. It is but natural for the baby to cry and anybody who knows the life will sympathise and will not take it as a complainable fault unless their mind is abnormal by nature.
However two family can discuss with cool temper and try to find out the best remedy with understanding not to complain or irritate one another in future as you have to live in the apartments for years in future also and can/t keep bitterness for long in the interest of both. If not the neighbours may find out a solution. God bless the concerned with good sense of living in harmony with the neighbours.
2007-06-26 14:22:05 · answer #6 · answered by vasudev s 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go to your landlord and make a compliant of harassment against her. She cannot make these demands upon you and your child. The apartment allows children so this is her problem, not yours. She can move out if she doesn't like the child. Does the landlord know about the remodeling project they have done with the ceiling? This might be a concern of theirs.
2007-06-26 11:06:42 · answer #7 · answered by American Girl 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Would you consider switching apartments with her? If you would, suggest it to your landlord first. Please do not forget the renovation project that the complainer went ahead and did and probably w/o the landlord's knowledge. You don't want the responsibility or credit for that. It could end up being a total violation and disaster.
If she continues to complain after you attempted the above you know that she is a complainer by nature.
2007-06-26 11:16:14 · answer #8 · answered by Queen 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would complain to the apartment office that she is harassing you when you have not been noisy at all.
Heck, even if you have, she should know that noise from upstairs neighbors is just part of apartment life.
2007-06-26 18:55:03 · answer #9 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Thats a hard situation to deal with, thats why it is important to have your ducks in a row before you have kids. Children derserve to live in a home where they can be loud, and not have to bother neighbors. I know that this is 2007, but still respect your neighbors.
2007-06-26 11:22:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋