I said that i didnt want to just yet because i'm not ready and i'm not even on the pill..and he said that it's okay and he understands and he was like 'really since its you i would wait forever for you' , and i was like awe hes so sweet he does care.. but i know he wants to and we both love each other but im a virgin and im pretty sure he is too.. he asked when i think im gonna be on the pill and i said i dont know, cuz i dont know.. lol me talking to my mom about that makes things right weird.
this is my first time with this kinda stuff..what if soon we were to do this with no pill but a condom??
i just really now changed my mind after he said that to me for some reason
.. ADVICE? also we are 16/17 which i don't think matters that much... also we have almost done it several times,, so like next time i don't know what to do?
2007-06-26 03:01:11 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Wait. Do not do it. Three weeks means nothing. If he really does love you then he will wait until you are fully comfortable. Also, by making him wait you know that he really does care. There is no rule that says you have to have sex with him before marriage anyway.
However, if you do decide to take the plunge then yes I would talk to your parents about going on the pill or go to planned parenthood yourself and go on the pill. It is also highly advisable that you use a condom as well. There are MANY diseases out there and they are spreading like wildfire. BE SAFE.
Good Luck with your decision.
2007-06-26 03:07:25 · answer #1 · answered by Macho Duck 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok.. You're 16/17 and you've only been together for three weeks. You are not in love, you're infatuated and that line "since it's you, I would wait forever" is just that - a line. Guys say that to make girls think, "Aw. That's so sweet. He really does care about me" because they know the girl will give in.
Think twice before you go giving yourself away because once you lose your virginity, it's gone for good and wasting it on a guy like this will be something you'll regret.
You said you weren't ready and you're right. You weren't and you still aren't. You're changing your mind because he's manipulating you.
Before you go having sex, think about the bad things that could come from it. Are you ready to have a child, because it COULD happen - even with a condom or on the pill. Did you know that some condoms don't prevent certain STD's? Think about things like this and learn everything you can before you have sex because some mistakes become permanent.
*EDIT* Also, if you aren't comfortable talking to your mom about sex, then you for sure aren't ready to have sex.
2007-06-26 03:09:45 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a tough situation here. I lost my virginity, as a guy, when I was 20 to my girlfriend at the time and I didn't really have a clue as to what to do either, but I learned and read up and after a couple months, I found myself and her were very good in bed. In his case, he seems paranoid about having a kid. I know that birth control is pretty effective when taken correctly, and I know the injection is nearly 100% effective and he could basically "finish inside you ever time" and you'd still be fine. All I can come out with out of this is he is paranoid and it happens to a lot of people. I'll tell you one thing, I used to be slightly paranoid as well because my gf was not on BC and we only had the condom (what if it leaked, etc.). It is just human nature to worry, especially at such a young age because he really doesn't want a kid. My advice is to legit talk to him, sit him down and explain to him that you love having sex with him and that if he really insists on wearing a condom, let him do it in the right fashion. Have him or you put it on right before intercourse but after the "arousal" stage. I mean, if I was him, I would definitely not be wearing one. Just tell him how awesome it would feel for him if he didn't wear one and how intimate/close you would both feel because there would be nothing separating your bodies. Good luck to the both of you.
2016-05-20 23:49:05 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your not ready then don't let what he said change your mind. Sure it was sweet but his no dummy either, he knew that if he said that you would respond that way. What are you going to do if once you go all the way him and he decides to dump you? Your not going to feel good about it at all. I've known plenty of girls that felt this way just like you did now an as soon as the deed was done the guy dump them and they ended up confuse and hurt and felt like they were made a fool of. Don't do it until you know that your ready 100% and your ready an able to deal with any consequences from it.
2007-06-26 03:23:47 · answer #4 · answered by Countrygirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a 53 year old man who still remembers what it was like to live with raging hormones (hell, at times!) I'm here to say, if he doesn't respect you enough to wait, then all he's out for is to score.
Don't do something you may regret the rest of your life. (Condoms are not 100% fool proof; don't be the fool to prove it. It only takes once to get pregnant)
(3 weeks and you believe you love each other; ask him what he'd do if you got pregnant; if he starts to hem and haw, then you know he won't stick around.)
I say wait until you're truly ready and prepared for the possible consequences of your coupling.
2007-06-26 03:12:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not have sex!!!!!! Enjoy being 16. When you engage in sex feelings, emotions come into play, and you are at an age where you should be enjoying life. What would you do if you were to become pregnant? You will not be able to provide for your child, you will lack the education necessary to get really good job, child care expenses, food, hospital costs, insurance, who is going to pay for all of these things if you have sex--unprotected. What happens when you have sex and then finds that he doesn't want you anymore, you are to young to try to handle all of this. Go to the malls with your friends, enjoy being 16, enjoy your youth, there is NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A VIRGIN, you should be very proud of that fact. It shows you have some integrity about you, you have self respect, and let no one take that away from you. Don't put yourself in a position where you might have sex with him. Please enjoy your life and wait. God Bless U :)
2007-06-26 03:11:37 · answer #6 · answered by pookster4262 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your very sensible !good for u ! have the condoms ready just incase, you dont have to discuss going on the pill with ur mum at ur age so unless u feel u need to, its ur private business. Everyone is in that position at some time in our teens, we alll have to judge for ourselfs if we are ready or not & if we are with the right guy. if you think its right for u going on the pill will be best in the longrun. hope that helps.
2007-06-26 03:10:26 · answer #7 · answered by carly16 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you aren't sure --- don't do it. You have too many questions in your head at the moment. You should have a clear conscience when you are ready for the first time.
You have to live with this decision for the rest of your life... it's Ok to wait.
2007-06-26 03:09:49 · answer #8 · answered by Challah back Girl... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be careful....are you sure you love him??? i mean you guys have been together for 3 weeks..im not saying that you dont...just be careful...i waited til about 5 months together with my boyfriend..you dont have to wait that long, but i wouldn't rush it either...get to know him more and see what he is really like..if he truely does care about you he will wait until you are ready..if he doesn't waiting a little bit longer will show you his true side...so just tough it out...hang in there and good luck!!
2007-06-26 03:07:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get on the pill or at east some condoms in case you get carried away and really do it, you don't want to be getting pregnant now. but if your not ready don't.
2007-06-26 03:06:49 · answer #10 · answered by Birdy is my real name 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋