Arranged Marriages!.. Do they work??.. I am facing one but I don't wish to Give Birth ever!!?

Question

So, how do I make sure this guy I am gonna marry is agreeable to my condition?

Indian people act like your a freak for not having a baby as soon as a man is secured, but glare longingly when they hear about your recent trip to Rome or amazing new sex, or night out with the girls--or the promotion, or new degree, or new painting you just finished, or the family member you flew to see- or when they see the smile on your face each day while they seethe over the husband who constantly cheats and how their teenager is stealing from their purse to buy their boyfriend clothes, or why didn't they go to college--considering the over population of the planet, the fact that 75% of people walking around are unplanned and /or unwanted, the fact that 50% of marriages end in divorce and 44% of men cheat---is breeding really all there is to a real life experience? sometimes you have to love your child enough not to have them----------------
So, how do I make sure this guy I am gonna marry is agreeable to my condition?

Answer 1

You seem like an independent woman. Why are you submitting to an arranged marriage? Since ancient times such marriages have worked, but they're usually not love matches. You know you'll never convince your future husband, his family, and your family not to expect children. My only suggestion is that if you marry this person, take birth control secretly.

Answer 2

Your call and tale tells me which you're an Indian. I sympathise with you and am optimistic which you're dealing with between the aggravating situations of your existence. i'm additionally an Indian or perhaps i'm going to could bypass by way of this interior the destiny. i'm going to tell you to bypass and tell your mothers and fathers which you will marry the girl whom you like and not some random woman whom you dont even know. this is the renowned situations the place very few human beings care approximately faith and caste. The soceity could remark on your determination or taunt you. Your mothers and fathers may well be harm and be very indignant, yet ultimately each and every thing would be all top. The soceity is familiar with that caste and faith discrimination is forbidden and that they'll appreciate your determination. it is going to easily take time. Do what your coronary heart tells you to do. Your mothers and fathers can basically advice you yet its your determination interior the final. Spending your comprehensive existence with a woman whom you dont know a lot and dont love is a lot worse than listening to some human beings communicate in the back of your decrease back. each and all of the final. i'm optimistic you will take the splendid determination. in case you decide on extra supply help to can mail me. i'm going to be happy to assist.

Answer 3

Hi MAndy

I had an arranged marriage, and i can lay out my whole life in front on you and, hand on heart, i would tell you that it was a waste of my life. Now i am stuck and darling, you will end up blaming the ones that arranged it. You should only go ahead if you think you are 100% sure and ready. I sure was not ready, and i wish i could turn back the hands of time, but life is too short and you only get one chance. There is no room for doubt. If you feel it in your heart that its the right thing to do, then do it. About the birth thing, again, please do not let people push you around. When that baby is screaming its head off, i assure you no one will be peeking their head around. Dont let others control your life. You are in control. Remember that, and nothing will ever get in your way. if you want more advice regarding this, please feel free to email me.

Answer 4

To have children or not is only your decision and no ones else matter.
See, husbands are generally like that: They get you pregnant and their share is done... who is the one to raise the children up is always the mother.
Husbands are often of a very egoist nature, for them life goes on like always with children or without them.
Anyway, I think you shouldn´t marry anybody who has been arranged for you.
You seem to be an intelligent woman who knows what she wants, why should you marry this guy?
Find somebody on your own who thinks like you.
First of all, make clear, what you expect from life and how you want to live your life.
I suppose, that your parents have arranged the typical good boy from a good family to be your future husband, a typical guy who expects to work hard, having a wife who handles the housework and having lots of children as soon as possible. (Just what parents expect from their kids to do)
This is not the right match for you, just tell him what you think and he will run away... so you will have enough time to find somebody who suits you better...

Answer 5

It is a sad reflection on Indian cultural religion that their so called planned marriages are so one sided in the mans favour, that the woman fares badly within the marriage. The western society frowns on planned marriages, but it is so entrenched in Indian society it is impossible to stop, unless you flee the country, leaving everything you hold dear to you, i.e. family and friends, behind. It is very hard for a young girl to enter into such a relationship without a sense of panic! Have a good day.

Answer 6

This is 2007. If you want to be a "liberated" woman, why settle for an arranged marriage? You seem too intelligent to buy into the myth that you're never going to have children with this 'stranger' you're considering marrying. Once wed, soon you'll be pushing out the babies you never wanted. Are you THAT naive? If you marry him, you are forfeiting years of women's liberation work, and subscribing to a SUBSERVIANT, MALE DOMINATED SOCIETY... don't do it. Dump him and find your own boyfriend. And if your parents don't like it, stand up to them and stand on your OWN feet.

Answer 7

I am against love marriages because:
1.You have gone out for entertainment,food,shopping or holiday together.
2.You know about each other so much,
What I am trying to say is that after the lovers get married the the man goes to work and the wife says you have changed now you don't take me out,but when your marriage has been arranged the after the wedding you start knowing each other and experience fun,entertainment holidays etc....together you start falling in love which grows day by day,and one day you realise that you are having a baby then loves gets stronger.I think arranged marriages are perfect in Indian culture.Best of all you are making and respecting your parents wishes.

Answer 8

Wo girl, you have jumped so high, what the hell are you going on about. I don't your future guy is going to agree, you do a very wild perception, i am alone parent i have 1 son and 1 daughter, and in our culture everyone is waiting for one of my kids to make a big mistake, but i have brought my children up that if they do anything wrong to come and tell me before anyone else does, i am not saying they are perfect. So please I am the one who had an affair, it doesn't mean all men are like that. So please, it seems you don't want to marry, you have too many issues i dont think you are ready. If you want your guy to understand you need to tell him before it goes any further. Good luck

Answer 9

That's not going to happen, you had better tell your family and his that you don't want to have children. I don't think they will give your opinion much weight, but I bet it causes a stir. A culture that will arrange a marriage isn't going to put the wishes of a girl foremost.

Answer 10

Pre-arranged marriages are like saying to the person that lives next door. I want my dog to make puppies with your dog.
Who ever thought up arranged marriages just wants to control people.
That is why religion was invented. So Kings could control their people.