How do I cope with my housemate- help needed urgently please?

Question

I live in a house of five and two of us do the same degree subject. I worked very hard for my degree and despite my mother dying half way through managed to get a 2:2 which I am happy with.

My housemate is famous for his bullshi**ing abilities and will do no more work than the minimum required for a pass. If he can he will ask others what it is he needs to research and write in order to get the grade (which usually meant me). He's a real lazy, smarmy guy who has managed to wangle a 2:1, and now he's rubbing it in my face (he is obviously naturally quite intelligent, moreso than me, just lazy and expectant of others).

What should I do; ignore it with dignity, point out that it's a shame final grades aren't reflective of effort, break his nose, what?!

Thanks for all serious advice.

I know this Q doesn't really belong here but some of you guys are the best at dealing out advice!

NB: Obviously I am happy with my final grade and accept that a lot of people will get higher marks, it's just his attitude which is the issue

Answer 1

I had a friend just like yours in that I always stated that I did two degrees my own and hers. She was always phoning me for hours at a time asking questions about the course work, and I would give her the answers.. When I had flashes of originality, she would write my idea in her assignment, hence I could not use my own ides as I would have been accused of plagiarism. This girl managed to get help from the tutors and one of the tutors gave her own notes. Needless to say she graduated with a 2-1 grade, whilst I got a 2-2., at least my degree was all my own work. All the advice I can give you do need enemies with a friend like him. Move on from him as as soon as possible and find another place to live, Congratulations on getting your degree .

Answer 2

You need to let go of this and move on, concentrating on the grade that you got and sorting out your own future.
We all meet people that seem to put no effort into anything and just 'breeze' through life, sometimes it can be frustrating (especially when you know that you have had to work so hard) but at the end of the day, it just is. There's nothing at all you can do about it. If you let yourself be bothered by it, you're only adding unnecessary frustration into your own life.
I believe that we all have our paths to take in life, to learn our lessons. He will have problems through his life, struggling with grades just isn't one of them.
Try to be happy for him. Don't compare yourself and your life to other people's. They have there talents and gifts, as do you. Just do what you think is right.
Also, I think that you may resent the fact that you helped him be 'lazy' with his studies so he could still get good grades. Maybe next time when he asks for help, tell him he has to earn his own rewards.
Congratulations for your result, you've done well and I'm sorry for the loss of your Mum, I imagine she's very proud of you.

Answer 3

tell him you are basking in reflected success as he is well aware that not only did you help him but also managed to deal with immense grief AND gain a very respectable grade, so if you were him you would stop bragging and put things in perspective, otherwise you cannot be responsible for delayed grief-related reactions to his insensitivity!!

if he continues to be a pain, ask other housemates if they can find a replacement?
and know that his karma will soon be along to kick him up the a**e lol!

you are secure in the knowledge that you have worked hard, coped well and have no need to be made at all insecure by this spoilt boy who will not succeed as well as he might in life unless he gets a grip and realises life is not all handouts and bragging. well done on being more mature than him!

and congratulations on your degree!!! your mother will be the proudest mother!

love and light
)o(

Answer 4

Ignore him, he'll get his comeuppance when he gets to the world of work.

Just enjoy your success, i got a 2:2 as well, i was a bit disappointed because i thought i worked just as well as those who got a 2:1, ten years later it still grates a little but i'm now earning more than 3/4 of them, so sucks to them!

Don't let him grind you down, lose him, you don't have to stay in contact with your old uni housemates now you are joining a different world. Keep the good friends but ditch him!

Answer 5

If in all other respects he is a good housemate then I would ignore his insensitive academic ways.

This really is his problem and he is the one that will have to face life in many different ways where his natural ability to learn and recall his learnings won't actually be of any benefit to him. Let life take care of him and don't let this be your problem.

Be proud of what you achieved. Life works better in the long run for those that can work hard and apply themselves.

Answer 6

Karma will have it's way with him eventually. However, sometimes Karma needs a helping hand.

I suggest you go for a run, a nice long run where you work up a sweat.

Next, sit down and have a nice snooze.

By now, your meat n veg should be smelling pretty damn rank. So, rub your johnson around the rim off all his mugs, clean your butthole with his toothbrush and drop some crusty bogies in his coffee pot.

Now savor the moment.

Answer 7

I cant see you are ever going to change this selfish, lazy guy so dont try. You can try to continue living in the same house and ignoring his constant pleas for help and just concentrate on your own work...or you can leave and move somewhere else but who's to say who you will end up with there. I wish you good luck

Answer 8

i understand why you are mad, you did some of his work etc and he did good, what have you learned? he isn't a good friend and his attitude will become evident at important times to important people in his life. as it has already happened let it go, let him enjoy his/yours and others success in his grade. his grade is temporary and if he is unwilling in his future dealings to have the appropiate effort he will suffer not you. keep your dignity and look forward to what will come your way more importantly what you have earned and deserve. resorting to violence or being hatefull serves you no purpose. move on, good luck.

Answer 9

He may be able to get away with that kind of laziness in school, but in the real world it's going to hurt him. You did the best you could and under very hard circumstances. Be proud of that and don't let him get to you. Peace.

Answer 10

I can't imagine that telling him that grades are a sham will make any difference. Anyone who is honest with themselves already knows this.

Breaking his nose won't do anything, other than prove that you're a jerk who resorts to violence.

You can't blame him for your decision to help him. Don't help him anymore. The next time he asks, tell him to do his own work.