the thing is he's 17 and she's 26 and they have a kid together and there married but she's got him rapped around her finger and i don't know if i should support this or not and i have no clue if this is being selfish . should i stop talking to him.
2007-06-25 18:36:07 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Bottom line....family is family, even when they make mistakes. Think of it like this....would you want HIM to ever turn his back on you and quit talking to you if you made a decision that HE didn't approve of? I agree that 17 is very young but this is the decision that he has made and he is the one who will suffer the consequences of it in the long run. How much worse will that be if he doesn't have the members of his family to see him through? Be there for him. You don't have to approve of his decisions in order to still be his family. Just don't shut him out of your life. I truly feel that would be the biggest mistake of all. Let him know that ~ even though you don't approve of what he has done ~ he is still your brother and you still care. (Which you obviously do because of the tone of your question.)
I wish the best of luck to you, him, and the rest of your family. I'll be sending good thoughts your way.
2007-06-25 18:47:15 · answer #1 · answered by laledalu2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stop talking to him whatever you do!!!! If he's wrapped around her finger, then he's going to need someone to talk to eventually. Because I was in a relationship like this and got no support. I was married when I was 18 and my husband ruled over me. It was very hard to deal with not only feeling like I was less than human all the time, but knowing that almost no one in my family or group of friends supported my decision. Support doesn't mean that you agree with what he did at all--just that you accept what he did and that you're willing to be there to listen when he has problems.
2007-06-25 20:04:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I suggest you do not stop talking to him. He's your brother, he needs you. Secondly, in my opinion, I think it is him you should be supporting and not the decision. It is what he has decided. You are his sibling, you are family and I'm sure he probably looks for your opinion. So give it to him, tell him how you feel but also accept what he decides. It is his life and when he realizes he has a made a mistake (if this is a mistake) then he'll need you there for him.
2007-06-25 19:01:48 · answer #3 · answered by Androgyny 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he is already married and has a child to this woman I think it may be a little to late. I think you should be there for your brother and your niece/nephew, if it's really that bad then when he matures a bit more he will realize that a healthy relationship isn't one where someones being controlled. He will always be tied to her through this child now though and the child is your niece/nephew so you kind of are (if you want to be) to. Don't stop talking to your brother, he will need you when times get tough and that could be sooner than you think:)
2007-06-25 18:46:06 · answer #4 · answered by ♣Bianca♣ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well as far as the age goes, my parents were 19 and 30 when they got married, and my boyfriend and I are 20 years apart. Age is a relative thing...it all depends upon love. But if he is truly as you say wrapped around her finger, just be there for him, you never know when he might just need someone to talk to. Family usually makes the best friends.
2007-06-25 18:52:55 · answer #5 · answered by Green Eyed Lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The damage is done now, why would your parents allow your brother to get married so young? Shouldn't his wife be in jail?At this point, you should just support your brother, because he needs his family to be there for him.If you stop talking to him and turn your back then his wife will find this as the perfect opportunity to stay close to her and disown his family.Give him advice ,if he ask , don't drive him further away.He has taken on a grown man role and his responsibility is to his family.
2007-06-25 18:44:11 · answer #6 · answered by misstee 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
he is your brother and at this time he needs you to guide him through the rest of his decisions, you know in life their is no right or wrong decisions it is how he would cope with it and accept the possible things that would happen, dont stop talking to him you are his family , right now help him with the practical things they need, perhaps he really loves this woman to stick through with her, and the kid too, they have a child, dont be selfish , be there he needs you now more than ever.
2007-06-25 18:42:11 · answer #7 · answered by haringmarumo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to support your brother. Supporting him, doesn't mean your supporting his decision, or that you approve, but he's already in, and it doesn't seem like he wants out of the situation. She is considerably older than him, and he is alot younger, so he is going to need you. Let him know that no matter what, right or wrong, you are his sister, and you only want what is best for him.
2007-06-25 18:41:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't stop talking to your brother. He has done nothing wrong but take responsibility for his actions and it is his choice to stay married to her. You are probably just mad because he has a wife and you two aren't around each other as much as you use to. Try doing something special with just the two of you.
2007-06-25 18:40:26 · answer #9 · answered by RedRabbit 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if your brother is happy, then support him. if you think that she's a bad person, let him know but accept the potential consequences. he is young and has to make his own mistakes so he's gonna do what he wants until he learns better.
2007-06-25 18:39:45 · answer #10 · answered by rubydoobydoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋