How to rebuild my life after the Jehovah's Witnesses?

Question

Well I am 27 year old guy and after 10 years I have decided to break away from the witnesses. I found the lack of love and concern for people rather un-Christian. I personally think most witnesses are rather shallow! I simply faded away without anyone noticing. I am not bitter about my experience with the witnesses but I just don't know where to go to make new friends? I don't want to ever be involved in religion ever again and I am not the type of guy who hangs out at nightclubs either. So what are my choices? I am bit too young to take up lawn bowls!

Well well well this topic has got some people really fired up! For the record I did make the effort with the witnesses by showing a personal interest in others. Trying to get them to socialize and be able to think freely. All I got from 95% of them was the silent treatment or ignored when I went to their so called kingdom halls. Would members of the so called true religion really behave like that?

Wow so many people so defensive about the witnesses what would the watchtower society think about all these so called witnesses commenting on this blog??

Answer 1

There are more choices than being involved in religion or going to bars. You do have a long road ahead of you though. I know I left two cults, the JW's and Pentecostalism. I had a harder time after my stint with the Pentecostals. Hang in there it will take time, but you will survive and fill the void. You might want to try to find other ex JW's this has helped me with the pain of my Pentecostal experience. search the internet for ex JW's and there might possibly be help out there.
BB

Answer 2

Well, I have been a Witness since 1958 and never had your problem, but am sure many have. You will find this problem in any religion, even the one "schnab" belongs to.

I found the lack of love and concern for people rather un-Christian, you say. You know the old saying "it takes two to tangle" just maybe some of the brothers seen this in you also.

I don't want to ever be involved in religion ever again, you also say, let me give you something to read about "false & true" religion.

What is false religion?

Why does religion seem to be at the root of so many problems?
The fault lies, not with all religion, but with “false” religion.

False Religion...MEDDLES IN WAR AND POLITICS: How many religions can you think of whose members engage in war?

False Religion...SPREADS FALSE DOCTRINE: Most religions teach that the soul or spirit is some invisible part of a human that survives the death of the physical body. However, the Bible teaches a different doctrine. “The soul that is sinning, it itself will die.” Ezekiel 18:4 Jesus taught that the dead will be resurrected, an unnecessary action if humans had an immortal soul. Does your religion teach that the soul does not die?

False Religion...TOLERATES IMMORAL SEX: Church groups ordain gay and lesbian members of the clergy. What, though, does the Bible teach? It plainly states: “Do YOU not know that unrighteous persons will not inherit God’s kingdom? Do not be misled. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men kept for unnatural purposes, nor men who lie with men.” 1 Cor. 6:9,10 Do you know of religions that condone immoral sex?

How to identify true religion.

True Religion...PRACTICES LOVE: True worshippers are “no part of the world,” are not divided by race or culture, and display “love among themselves.” Rather than killing one another, they are willing to die for one another.

True Religion...TRUSTS GOD'S WORD: Instead of teaching “tradition” and “commands of men as doctrines,” true religion bases its doctrine on God's Word, the Bible

True Religion...STRENGTHENS FAMILIES AND UPHOLDS HIGH MORAL STANDARDS: True religion trains husbands to “love their wives as their own bodies,” helps wives to develop “deep respect for their husbands,” and teaches children to “be obedient to their parents.”

True Religion is available, search for it.
You had it, get it back

JW's unlike members of other religions, do not use bad language, they do not lie to each other, they do not commit adultery, cheat in business, etc. and if they do, they probably would be removed from the Congregation, you know this, unlike other religions.

I don't want to ever be involved in religion ever again, you also say, well that's good to a point, because if you read the above, you know there is no where else to go.

Wish you were in my Cong.

Answer 3

Just because of the imperfections of others you chose to leave Jehovah. You are not going to find what you are looking for in the world. The world will eat you up and spit you out! Why not try a different congregation? Please don't continue with what you are doing? You are making a mistake! We are so close to the end. Our relationship is with Jehovah, and we are all imperfect you are not going to find perfection anywhere you go. What are you going to do when this system falls and it is to late to run back to Jehovah? Who is going to save you, the world? The world is passing away. I don't know you but I am concerned. I hope you will consider finding another congregation and give Jehovah another chance.


I just read your additional details it seems you are blaming others for your choice not to serve Jehovah anymore. You asked if true Christians would behave like that? Well, a true Christian certainly doesn't behave the way your are choosing. I think Psalms 119:65 sums it up well. "Abundant peace belongs to those loving your law, and for them there is NO stumbling block.

Answer 4

You can't rebuild your life after leaving the Witnesses because when one leaves Jehovah God by leaving his people what is there to build?

Think about King Saul, he left Jehovah God, what happened to him? Never got his life back.

Your finding is flawed. We do have a great love for people, it is just that you want to party too much. Why is it that people need this "love" as you put it? As a famous philosopher once put it "What's love got to do, got to do with it
What's love, but a second-hand emotion"

Your problem, is you and that you focused on the people and not serving Jehovah. Thus you are making the wrong choice by the wrong motives. As you stated you are out to make friends, but you did not make Jehovah God your friend.

Your choice was made when you put people ahead of God.

Answer 5

There may be another point of view to consider.
If you were able to fade away without any one noticing, do you feel that you were reaching out in love and concern? Perhaps you were. I'm not trying to be critical of your decision. I just know that when a person feels left out or something of that sort, the advice is to get more involved and reach out to others, maybe stir up some fun. We can be a catalyst for change in our environments, or we can just hold others responsible. Offering this out of love.

Answer 6

I am 35 years old, Revelation 17 explain how false religion will be destroyed, and you can see it in CNN, the book of Revelation has 22 chapter so only five more chapter for finish, 78% of the book fulfilled, do you think is a wise decision what you claim you did?

Answer 7

Some Jehovah's Witnesses become inactive because they feel unable to continue preaching or certain other Christian obligations for a few months or even years. These are not counted in any JW statistics, but they are considered "brothers" and "sisters" by active Witnesses. Their standing is entirely different from those who are disfellowshipped or disassociated.


Jehovah's Witnesses practice the Scriptural practice of disfellowshipping for unrepentance of such serious sins as fornication, drug abuse, stealing, and apostasy. Baptized Witnesses who join the military or publicly engage in worship with another religion are considered to have disassociated themselves from Jehovah's Witnesses.

Contrary to the misinformation of anti-Witnesses, it is quite possible to become inactive in the JW religion without becoming disfellowshipped. As long as one's lifestyle does not bring reproach upon the congregation, and as long as one does not advocate one's disagreements with the religion, the congregation has no interest in "investigating", exposing, and disfellowshipping an inactive former Jehovah's Witness.

For those who are disfellowshipped or disassociated, a primary goal is to shock the person into recognizing the serious of their wrong so that they rejoin the congregation in pure worship. Since the primary bonds that are broken involve friendship and spiritual fellowship, it is well understood that family bonds remain intact. Parents, siblings, and grown children of disfellowshipped and disassociated ones sometimes choose to limit what they may feel is discouraging or "bad association" but that is a personal decision and is not required by their religion.

Former Witnesses who are disfellowshipped or disassociated are typically treated in accord with the Scriptural pattern explained in these Scriptures:

(1 Corinthians 5:11-13) Quit mixing in company with anyone called a brother that is a fornicator or a greedy person or an idolater or a reviler or a drunkard or an extortioner, not even eating with such a man. ...Remove the wicked man from among yourselves.

(Titus 3:10) As for a man that promotes a sect, reject him after a first and a second admonition

(Romans 16:17) Now I exhort you, brothers, to keep your eye on those who cause divisions and occasions for stumbling contrary to the teaching that you have learned, and avoid them.

(2 Thessalonians 3:6) Now we are giving you orders, brothers, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, to withdraw from every brother walking disorderly and not according to the tradition you received from us.

(2 Thessalonians 3:14) But if anyone is not obedient to our word through this letter, keep this one marked, stop associating with him, that he may become ashamed.

(2 John 10) If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, never receive him into your homes or say a greeting to him.

(Matthew 18:17) If he does not listen to them, speak to the congregation. If he does not listen even to the congregation, let him be to you just as a man of the nations

Becoming baptized as a Jehovah's Witnesses is not a trivial step. At a minimum, a student must demonstrate months of regular meeting attendance and public ministry, then must himself express the desire to be baptized. The candidate then spends hours answering hundreds of bible questions wherein he expresses both a clear understanding and personal conviction regarding Jehovah's Witness teachings in at least three separate interviews with three different elders. The candidate must vocally agree to be baptized in front of hundreds or thousands of eyewitnesses, and must be publicly immersed in water. This is not a momentary emotional decision by an unreasoning child. Dedication as a Witness required hard work and determination at the time.

Learn more:
http://watchtower.org/e/19880415/article_01.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/19970101/article_01.htm

Answer 8

Even thought you had a bad experience with religion, don't cut it completely out of your life. I'm not saying go back to being a Jehovah's Witness, but instead try praying and asking God what to do with your life. It never fails. I hope everything turns out OK. After all,even when man lets you down Jesus never will.

Answer 9

I have been inactive for two years. The biggest mistake that I made was to use their shallowness as an excuse to lose the standards in my life. Keep up the Bible reading. The Bible is God's Word and he loves us. Don't go to nightclubs. They are the equivalent of ancient Egypt, Canaan, and Philistia.

There are two ways of making friends according to the Bible. You can cast a spell over people (Revelation 18:23 - "The light of a lamp will never shine in you again. The voice of bridegroom and bride will never be heard in you again. Your merchants were the world's great men. By your magic spell all the nations were led astray.") or you can meet their real needs in a humble way. Matthew 25:35, 36 says: "For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me." Get out whatever food and clothes you don't need and see if there's somebody on the street who needs it. See if you can share a Bible scripture as well, like 1 Corinthians 13:4-8.

Talking about marriage in a sentimental way or business concerns might well get people's ears pricked up and you may be able to make "friends" talking about those concerns, but you risk being considered insubstantial if you don't have much to contribute to others in terms of those concerns (Proverbs 19:4 - "Wealth attracts many friends, but even the closest friends of the poor desert them." Luke 16:9 - "I tell you, use worldly wealth to gain friends for yourselves, so that when it is gone, you will be welcomed into eternal dwellings.") and plus you're not making real friends or making a real difference to the planet.

God does not expect heroism from us. 1 John 5:3 says: "In fact, this is love for God: to keep his commands. And his commands are not burdensome." That's all we have to do - just do what we're told. Hold out the word of life (Philippians 2:16) without complaining or arguing, and obey the authority structures as outlined in the Bible. Be prepared for persecution. (2 Timothy 3:12) You can't be prepared for persecution if you love the desires of the flesh. (Galatians 5:19-23) You need to have the flow of the Holy Spirit in your life by eliminating all traits of selfish ambition and bitter envy. (James 3:14)

Answer 10

I am with you on not being involved in religion. I have been a Christian for over 33 years and I despise religion. You see religion is simply a bunch of doctrines imposed on others through their intellect and through an organization that would like to believe they are alright with God simply by believing a bunch of ideas.

Christianity is not a religion - but a personal relationship with God through the sacrifice of Jesus Christ on the cross. It is a wonderful experience to have sin pardoned and cleansed by a loving God who wants an intimate relationship with you.

I was into a lot of religion before I became a Christian. I was Catholic and protestant and in different protestant denominations. I played around a little with witchcraft too.
None of that satisfied and left me feeling like you. I began to curse God and Christ daily and cared less.

In 1974 God totally revamped my life when I asked Him to forgive me of my sin. Since then I have had a very happy life and now have a wife and seven children who love the Lord.
I have a sister who is in the witnesses and I am praying that God will deliver her from that as you have been delivered.

If you would like to talk more about it please email me at my personal email -- [e-mail] -- please make sure you put Yahoo Answers in the subject line as I delete all email that
I don't recognize to prevent viruses and spam. I PROMISE THAT I WILL NOT TRY TO PUSH ANYTHING ON YOU. YOU ARE A FREE MORAL AGENT AND YOU MAY BELIEVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE. I just want to share how God made my life better, and that he can do the same for you.

I always answer my emails.

Rick


EDIT: I SEE THE DECEIVED ARE OUT IN FORCE IN HERE, AND AGREE WITH THE ASKER THAT THEIR COMMENTS CERTAINLY DON'T REFLECT THE LOVE OF GOD.