Is abstinence normal? Why not make birth control available to your teen?

Answer 1

Listen to 'em: 'Sex is WRONG!' 'They should keep their pants on!' etc etc ad nauseam.

And the fact that inadequate sex education plus policies of abstinence inevitably result in high teenage pregnancy rates just doesn't get through, does it?

Which shouldn't even matter, because there's universal, cheap termination available to all. But that, too, is evil, apparently, and so we have generations of ruined lives for child parents and their offspring.

Disgusting.

CD

Answer 2

Well, the second part is a very good question. Why the objection over birth control for teens? Obviously religious reasons from many different faiths are the main culprit. Beyond religious reasons, there are many vallid reasons why teens generally shouldn't be having sex.

However, the fact of the matter is, teens WILL have sex, regardless of what faith they belong to or who preaches to them.

It seems to me that withholding birth control from teens does NOT result in less sex. I'd love to see one study that says otherwise. What it DOES do is result in the spread of disease, unplanned pregancy, and ruined lives.

Yes, it would be great if the "just say no" saying had any real meaning, and it led to less teen sex at a time when most simply are either incapable or unwilling to understand the consequences. However, teens will have sex, and I feel that if they are, they should at least do it in a safe manner. Getting birth control shouldn't be an obstacle.

Answer 3

Is abstinence normal? No people have sex it's a natural thing.. While everyone would ideally like their child to wait it doesn't always happen..


Why not make birth control available to your teen? I have 3 children (ages 19, 17 and 10) my two older children know all there is to know about birth and disease control and have access to condoms, spermicidal lube(kill of the little buggers that too ambitious for it's own good and in the case of condom failure an added line of defense), etc. (I have a basket filled with a rotating stock for their use, I make sure it's all in date and always available) My 10 yr old has a rudimentary knowledge and understanding of birth and disease control and will be given the rest of the information over the next couple of years.. When she is ready the basket will be stocked and available..

While I would like my children to wait until they are older and more mature I am not naive enough to think they always will, premarital or teenage sex is not something I think deserves a death sentence, with today's diseases death is a real risk..

It is a parents responsibility to arm their child with knowledge they will need in the real world birth and disease control is a very important piece of knowledge all children should be taught along with the moral values their parents wish to instill..

Teaching only abstinence is like teaching a child there are knive but not how to properly use them..

Answer 4

No and no reason.

Once we hit puberty, our bodies switch over to baby making mode and all of our hormones kick off to urge the process on. Sex is normal. However, because society evolves faster than biology, we have come to a time when you can't really grow up to be an adult by 13 years of age. So, we urge our children to hold off until an older age, when they can more readily accept the responsibilities that are associated with sex.

There will be some people who will claim that nobody should have sex unless they're married, but that's just an outdated taboo. Sex shouldn't be taken lightly, but it isn't something to be avoided. As long as you can accept the responsibility for sex and have a willing partner, it's great.

Part of that responsibility includes using birth control properly and taking other measures if that doesn't work. Teens will have sex soon, and it is a huge responsibility, so they should be taught how to do it responsibly.

Answer 5

It's about sending the right message. Just as studies are now showing giving your kids alcohol at a young age to "get them used to it" in the hope that they will treat it responsibly is exactly the WRONG thing to do. Send the message, loud and clear, underage sex and underage drinking are wrong. Be a parent to your child, not a friend. They have plenty of friends for that role. It may not stop them from drinking and having sex, but hopefully at least postpone it to an age where it is more appropriate for their health and emotional levels(say, when they are 17 or so). Abstinance may not be normal, but it is appropriate for kids.

EDIT: So, superatheist, you argue Sex is "RIGHT" for 15 year olds, even 13 year olds, as long as they don't get pregnant ? Sex isn't wrong, 13 year olds having sex IS wrong ! It's not about denying them the knowledge, or even making birth control available, It's about sending the right message. My point is educate them by all means, but don't make it sound like it's ok or inevitable for them to have sex at 13.

Answer 6

There is no age limit or problem with children buying condoms if they want them. They are on the shelf in supermarkets. At the age of consent (16 in most countries), girls can see a doctor and get the pill should they want to do so without their parents' knowledge or permission. It is nothing to do with the parents.

Teenagers should be taught about contraception. If they are going to have sex, which many are, they need to know. You can recommend abstinence but many are going to have sex anyway. Teach them about contraception and safe sex and if they want condoms, make sure they have them.

Answer 7

Having self control is normal unless you just think we humans are nothing but animals and unable to do so. Having self respect is normal. Waiting until you are emotionally, physically and mentally ready is normal. My teen will not be on birth control. She has way too much respect, self esteem and intelligence to just screw around. Besides, birth control pills are horrible for you. Have you ever read the booklet of possible side effects and dangers? Why poison yourself with chemicals and artificial hormones because you don't know how to say no?

God Bless.

Answer 8

I explained birth control and made it available to my son when he started dating at 15. I wasn't giving him permission to have sex, but educating him in the ways of teens. He was raised by a single mother, so he knows just how difficult this can be.

I'm happy to say that he's 22, gainfully employed, going to school, has his own apartment, and is engaged. He'll be married this October.

Abstinence is not normal, so responsibility needs to be taught and maintained. I'm proud of the man he's become, and as of today he is not yet a father.

Answer 9

Abstinence is not normal. It is Ascetic.

Whether you believe in God or Evolution, the Human Body is designed for sex. Next to breathing, eating, and drinking, it is the third strongest impulse. The sex drive is turned on by puberty, which (whether you believe in God or Evolution) happens in the early teens.

What Christians and the whole of Society forgets, is that it is SOCIETY and not God or Evolution or anything else, that has postponed the "appropriate" age for sex between 10 and 15 years. This is not normal. Whether you believe in God or Evolution it is not normal.

500 years ago, when a 12 year old girl reached puberty, she was married off. Today, we expect her to wait until she is 25. And we tell her that "God wants to to refrain from sex" until she is married. Which you're not supposed to do until you graduate from college.

Answer 10

Sex is not gymnastics. Teens are in a time of searching for their idenity and their role in life. Hormones are raging and so are emotions. Teens are not likely to have the maturity and emotional resources to deal with intimacy, which inevitably goes beyond the sheer physical act of sex.

Teach your teen about contraception. Teach them also about emotional responsibility. I am a grandmother. I taught my sons about contraception and the emotional responsibility of intimacy. They are now 32 and 29.