My step son is 15...he has lived with me and his dad since he was 5. I have seen some stuff talked about on myspace that I don't approve of. Plus I think he is sneaking over to his girlfriends house while I am at work. Since I am the step mom, there is not much I can say. I trust him to a point but he is a 15 year old boy and I don't want him making any mistakes. I can't keep my mind off of what he is doing- any advice? I know I should let his dad handle it but again- he's a guy too and you know how they are with their sons!! Am I stuck between a rock and a hard place or what? Not to mention,,,his mom pushes for him to be with his girlfriend. she takes him over there! I think she just wants him to like her and to be his friend
2007-06-25 06:07:42 · 6 answers · asked by minnieab 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I am very surprised that you say you really can't do anything because you are only his Step Mom.. You have been his step Mom more than 10 years, over two thirds of his life. I honestly feel that you have more right for his upbringing than his biological Mother. If you don't approve of your step-son going to his girlfriend's then you should tell him so. I would also advise your Husband that you have a strong suspicion tha he is doing something very wrong there, and his going over there should be controlled. You should also ask him to support you on this issue, and to speak to his son. If he is having sexual relations with this girl, I belief when her family discovers what is going on there will h--l to pay. The police may even get involved.You said you didn't want him to make any mistakes, but you really left the door opened to what you think he might be doing. If my assumption is correct this could very easily get out of control. Your Husband or you should politely tell his ex-wife to butt out of her son's upbringing since she is contributing to the delinquency of a minor, and is also punishable under the law. I think you Husband will mtake this a little more seriously than just because he is a male he will think it's ok. I hope this will be of some assistance to you, but I feel your husband should be involved. It wouldn't be right to get a call from the Police that his son was arrested for sexual crime. That would be a tough way to find out what is going on, and you could of helped from the beginning. Good Luck, try to slow down this relationship before a pregancy takes place. Some young people never realize what the circumstance are until it is too late.
2007-06-25 07:55:22 · answer #1 · answered by Butch. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
teenagers are teenagers which means as a rule they think they know everything and you know nothing: Typical teenager behavior: which also means they have to be set down and given a good talking to (polite for a**s chewing) from time to time.
If his behavior is taking place in your house then yes you definitely have the right whether your husband likes it or not. That also includes whether his ex-wife likes it or not.
If he comes back with a "You do not know how it is" just tell him you've been there done that when you were a teenager. Done already been through that.
2007-06-25 06:37:25 · answer #2 · answered by JUAN FRAN$$$ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't waste your effort, you'll lose both ways. The only option I see for you is to tell his father what your concerns are and how you think he should handle it. You can make rules for what happens IN your house but no more.
I have a similar situation and would never recommend anyone take on step children. It can be hell.
I hope this helps.
2007-06-25 06:18:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a talk with him and let him know that you just want to help him and keep from making any mistakes. As far as his mom, well there isn't much that you can do there except let her do what she wants but you can talk to your stepson and let him know that you care about him and you don't want to make a mistake that could change his life and his future.
2007-06-25 06:13:49 · answer #4 · answered by Happily Taken 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The boy has to live his own life and make the mistakes so he can learn from them. If he is choosing to sneak out and not listen to anyone, who's fault is that? His! And if he gets his girlfriend pregnant, let his mother take care of him!
2007-06-25 06:18:39 · answer #5 · answered by theewokprincess 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if his mom is with him, then you don't need to worry, & stop thinking about him so much, you might get your self sick, think about yourself & husband, your step-son got his mom to worry
2007-06-25 06:24:47 · answer #6 · answered by maya 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋