my biracial children and my racist father?

Question

i am white and my husband is black. my father won't stop calling our children "niglets" in public like it's their nickname. what should i do?

Answer 1

Keep this man away from your children that is what you do. I can't believe you have allowed them to be around him for this long. It's your job to watch out for them and protect them, even from grandpa.

I would stop all contact until he can grow up and be a real grandpa to these kids.

Answer 2

Have nothing more to do with your father. I'm sorry. I know it sounds harsh, but his attitude will only rub off on your children and make them feel inferior. We don't allow anyone to say the N word, in any form, at our house and our relatives know that. I feel that when people say the N word, it poisons the air in our house, and I'm very firm about that. I feel very strongly that you should offer your father two choices: you can accept my family as is or you can lose us forever. If he chooses the second one because your husband is black, then stick to your guns. Tell him you're sorry his grandchildren won't ever know him and let that be that.

Answer 3

i would stop your father from any contact with the kids UNTIL he realizes how insulting he is being towards them

it is bad enough that society has certain attitudes against people of other ethnic groups - but within the family is totally unacceptable

if he cant love them enough to see beyond their bi racial heritage as being a problem then i would guarantee that them being exposed to that racist name calling is going to cause them harm in the long term

just curious - how does your husband deal with that kinda thing?

Answer 4

Lady put your foot down with your father. How dare he calls your children this way. You tell him to address your children by their first name. If he refuses them disown your father. He is being a racist, he has no right to call your children that way. This will affect your children self estem. Put a stop to it now.

Answer 5

Some people are far gone and it would be impossible to change their ways. I feel you should just keep your children away from your father maybe this way he'll get it through his thick skull that this name calling is unacceptable. You have to protect your children.

Answer 6

You need to sit down with your father and explain to him that his treatment of your children is unacceptable to you and your husband. Explain to him that it is hurtful to your family and especially your beautiful children and tell him that you would be very sad if you had to keep your children away from him to avoid their self esteem being crushed by his use of such words.

I just hope your father realises that he's also doing damage to himself by his attitude - your children may grow to detest him as they grow older and he will miss out on some wonderful moments in his life because of his narrowmindedness.

Answer 7

All I can suggest you do is keep your father as far away from the kids as possible, as your children shouldn't be anywhere near such a negative influence in their lives.

Answer 8

Stop letting your dad visit the kids. Their self-esteem is more important than his deservedly bruised feelings.

Distance yourself from toxic people. It's like an infection that spreads to you and the people around you the longer you spend time around the toxic person, even if it's your dad. I'd keep it to cards and calls for now.

Answer 9

Do not have your children around him and let him know that he is being disrespectful and u will not tolerate it, not to mention the effect it will have on the children, they are going to experience crap anyway cause people are ignorant they should not have to deal with it at home.

Answer 10

stop going out with your father in public. this is not funny nor should be taken as a joke. you need to protect your children from this racist loser