Anyone lost a brother or sister?

Question

i lost my sister in 2004 she was killed in a car accident she was 18 and left a party she was drunk, i was 20 at the time and she was the closet person i knew. i still suffer from the pain of missing her and still don't want to believe it sometimes. a lot of people try to talk to me to comfort me but they never been threw that pain which cannot be described. how do you accept it?

Answer 1

Hi,

Please let me begin by saying how sorry I am for your loss.

I lost my brother about 14 yrs. ago (handsome, athletic, funny university math professor).

I felt unbelievable loss, and it took me forever to come to terms with his death.

Given the time since your sister's passing, and given what I (accurately or inaccurately) perceive as your unmitigated grief, I would encourage you to seek counseling for yourself in an effort to come to terms with your feelings of grief.

*Counseling will help you to look into yourself to find the source(s) of coming to terms with your grief, so that you can move on with your life to celebrate and share the relationship which you shared with your sister.

*While moving on through your grief will not be an easy process, it will enable you to show yourself and the world just how special your sister was, and continues to be to you.

Please know that you will be able to accept your sister's physical loss, and eventually, be able to celebrate her life, and warmly chuckle at every relative who shares your sister's personality, even if for just what everyone else would think is a cute quirk.

These things will keep your sister's rich relationship with you alive in your heart forever; not as a source of grief, but as a source of inspiration and all so many respites from your day-to-day life.


Best wishes, I hope this helps.

Answer 2

I am so sorry for your loss and 'no' I have never lost a sibling but do have four older sisters that I can talk about anything a lot better than my mother and I know I would be in the same boat as you if I lost any of them that way.

Also I don't think you learn to accept something like that you just have to remember who she was while she was alive and not how she died.

Answer 3

my sis died in jan. 2005 from cancer. not as young as yours and from illness not accident but, still, my only sister and my best friend. i've accepted it but i still miss her to the point of crying. i think in your case, the fact that your sis was taken so young from something so preventable makes it more difficult. you were robbed of your relationship with her and she was robbed of her life way to soon. is it possible that you're angry with her? it's totally normal by the way. she did something she shouldn't have and now she's gone. she isn't there for you to scold or teach so your anger builds up inside. try this, write her a letter telling her how you feel about what happened and how you feel now. say everything you wish you'd had the chance to say if she were here. you can read it outloud as if she were in the room with you, you can keep it or burn it. it's up to you. sometimes the act of writing can help. you could even turn it into a journal if you like.
whatever you decide, forgive her . peace.

Answer 4

I 'souly' lost my brother, I guess you could say in 2000. He was 15 and he was on his way home when the car swerved in the rain and he went flying through the wind shield, shattering his skull. He was the only one not wearing his seatbelt and the only one seriously injured. Though this sounds cliche, the police said we could have lost him if they had come five minutes later. Life has been hell since. He needed much plastic surgery and was in the hospital for months. I remember having to stand up and tell my class, 1st grade, that my brother was in the hospital dying. I hated my teacher for doing that to me. I started crying right there, as my words were shaky. Now my brother is seriously depressive about his looks taking medicine for brain damage from the accident. he has metal plates in his head. i feel your loss for your sister, god rest her soul. from the car accident, i feel what has been after is just as good as losing him myself.

Answer 5

I lost a brother in 05, I don't think you will ever get over it.

Answer 6

My heart bleeds for you. Thankfully all my siblings are still alive... sorry but I can't really help you.