I have been seeing my boyfriend for almost three years. I love him a lot and thought the relationship has been great. I won't go into details with our sex life but lately he has been talking about having a threesome with another girl. He tells me that I would enjoy having another female. I tell him that I am not interested in having a sexual relationship with another female. He says that I am selfish and I don't consider his feelings. The question is am I the one being selfish or is he just being a jerk?
2007-06-24 15:41:57 · 27 answers · asked by Paige Turner 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There are so many good questions that I will let the community vote. Yes I did break it off. I told him that he does not have his priorities straight and he needs to think things through. I will consider getting back with him once he grows up. I have a pretty busy life with work, going to college, my daughters and weight lifting that I won't miss him.
2007-06-27 02:26:38 · update #1
You are not selfish, HE is! He is the one not considering YOUR feelings!
Tell him that if he keeps talking about a threesome, that he won't even have a twosome anymore, and he'll have to fly solo!
2007-06-24 15:45:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
He is a jerk... it would be different if this was like you all's fantasy talk, but he is really trying to convince you to let him sleep with another female!
I think his only problem is that it has been three years and he might be a little bored.
Do you think maybe you all should take a break from each other? This way you will not be hurt if he does cheat on you/ you can get some strange and you all can have a happy life together!
Maybe if you don't think that is such a great idea then suggest that you bring another man into the pic for you all to have a threesome with and if he says no tell him he is selfish.
2007-06-24 15:51:08 · answer #2 · answered by Kathrine B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex-boyfriend did the same thing to me. He constantly wanted to have a threesome and he tried all kinds of disgusting ways to get me interested in another female so "I would enjoy myself." Well, I told him "no way." He is being a selfish jerk because he would rather risk you being uncomfortable with this for his own enjoyment. If he really loved and respected you, he would respect your feelings here and not try to push this on you. Please don't do this and I would seriously consider getting another boyfriend.
2007-06-24 15:48:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you seriously even asking this ??? your boyfriend IS a jerk which is actually an understatement but as for you? I seriously dont mean to sound rude or anything but your obviously so naive?! how could you have been in a relationship this long ? if you're having a hard time figuring out something simple as that maybe you need to leave this relationship and mature some more before you decide to get so serious, you could seriously end up hurt alot worse if you continue on being so naive...but it's up to you
2007-06-24 15:48:29 · answer #4 · answered by Gigi V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is being a jerk. No matter what, if you're not comfortable with something and someone tries to guilt you or pressure you into it, then it's them, not you.
Sex, any kind of sex, is a major thing. To try to pressure someone into something that they don't want to do is wrong.
You should tell him that if you have a threesome with a girl, then you guys should have a threesome with a guy. Turn around is fair play.
2007-06-24 15:45:30 · answer #5 · answered by deanna4273 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's the one being a selfish jerk. Suggest a threesome with a guy and see how he feels about it. He may not persist after seeing what it's like in your shoes.
2007-06-24 15:45:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you have to ask this question bothers me. You should be able to say, "NO WAY IN HELL" without being called selfish.
I, personally, do not feel that introducing a third person -- male OR female -- into a sexual relationship does ANYTHING to improve the relationship. Sounds like he's bored with your sex life or has been watching one too many porn flicks and wants to expand his fantasy life into his real life.
Sexual activities have to be pleasurable to both partners. He needs to respect that you are not at all interested in this. If he resorts to name-calling in order to get you to go along with him -- please, please, take a long hard look at where this relationship is going.
2007-06-24 15:49:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're certainly not being selfish to want him for yourself one-on-one. He's a jerk, and whatever woman he's proposing as the third party is the one he has in mind to replace you.
He's not considering the big leap you'd have to make to make love to another woman. He's a victim of porno fantasies. Make it clear that you're not interested in sharing him, and the next time he brings it up tell him you're moving on if he keeps after you about it. Good luck.
2007-06-24 15:45:47 · answer #8 · answered by David W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's him. I applaud him for telling you what he wants but then I stop clapping to cuff him for his remark of you being selfish. He is just trying to have his fantasy fulfilled and is using a pressure tactic. He should respect your decision on the matter but my guess is that he will either cheat on you or break up with you but I say lucky you because you will be so much better off with out him around you.
2007-06-24 15:52:35 · answer #9 · answered by not_moes_cousin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its defiantly him
i know its hard because you have been with him for 3 years and congratulations for that but dont let him push you into something you dont feel comfortable about. He should respect your feelings as well certainly since you have been seeing each other for some time now just try to sit down with him and tell him how you really feel if doesn't respect it then maybe you should start keeping your options open for other guys.
I hope it works out between you!
2007-06-24 15:49:20 · answer #10 · answered by ello-poppet 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋