I'm working on a relationship and 3/4 down the conversation she says that I can ask questions too?

Question

I believe I do ask her questions but only when they naturally come. When she says that (and she's done it multiple times) I have no idea what to ask. Usually try to come up with some goofy question but still... Also she tends toward sarcasim and I don't always know what she means when she says something. Any thoughts out there on this?

Answer 1

First of all--don't try to make her see what's good about you. I hate it when guys do that.

Honestly, if you don't have questions, don't ask. Instead, I'd recommend you think of a subject you're particularly passionate about; volunteering, animals, whatever, and ask her how she feels about that. Whether it's related to the current subject or not, try it anyway. If nothing else, some of the best conversations you'll ever have may be sparked by your curiosity.

If she talks for a while, and you feel as if you should ask a question, just say, "what do you mean?" Women are hard to understand; we know this and won't be surprised if we say something that doesn't make sense. Having her expand on simple thoughts is a great way to get to know her better.

And also, the first guy said she thinks you're boring--don't listen to that. You, being a man (I'm pretty sure, anyhow) will never understand us. Hell, we barely understand ourselves. She may simply want to get to know you better; this could actually mean she finds you interesting, and would like to know more.

Your age connotates that you are a mature adult, I'm assuming you have a career or are enrolled in schooling. Each day, before you leave for the day, remind yourself to keep an eye out for anything that she might find interesting; a joke told by a coworker, or possibly a discussion in class. Feel free to say, "Oh, that reminds me--the funniest thing happend today." Continue by stating the "funniest thing," making it clear that you're happy to share your life with her.

Also, ask her about her profession/classes. For instance, "By the way, I know you're learning to be a (insert career name here), but what will you actually do when you become one?" If she pauses after saying something and looks at you for a moment, it may mean that she'd like to tell you more, but wants to make sure you're interested. If what she said sounded interesting, say, "wait--what was that about... ?" I'm sure she'd be happy to expand on what she talks about.

All in all, be yourself--if the two of you aren't right, it'll be difficult to make it right. Either way, she sounds like a good friend; make sure she stays a friend even if things don't work out.

Answer 2

She is finding you boring. You don't have to start asking her more questions, or understand her sarcasm if you don't want. But you do have to become more interesting to her.

For a start make sure she sees you being excellent at something. Doesn't matter what, whatever your gift or special ability, let her see it.