If you are naturally "thin skinned" can you do anything about it or is it just a trait you are born with?

Question

so many great answers - thanks for all of them

Answer 1

I am also overly sensitive. I have a lot of trouble not letting what someone says really hurt me. I used to wait until I was alone and actually cry about it. I would feel like no body could understand me and the whole world was out to hurt. People didn't care what they said to me or how much it hurt me. I would always read between the lines and that really got me in trouble. I have done this for as long as I can remember so yes I would say I was born with it.

I have started to learn not to read between the lines it is hard and no matter what I still want to do it. I try to take things at face value and realize that with some people it is just the way they are. They don't know any other way to say things they are not out to hurt me. The others I try to ignore by thinking of something else. Sometimes I just think of what I would like to say to that person. I would like to tell them they shouldn't say something to hurt other people I am doing better with it, but it does take time.

Answer 2

First of all, let me say I have never liked that phrase "thin skinned" at all. Why? Because it makes a sensitive person feel as if something is wrong with their character. In fact, a person who is sensitive is a person who is real and feels things.

Second, let's define this a couple of ways; a sensitive person and a person who is overly sensitive. A person who is sensitive has a clear understanding of right and wrong and has deep feelings for people and ideas. An overly sensitive person gets angry at every comment, thinks others are after them, etc. In other words, they carry sensitivity to an unrealistic level because they have some issues.

Usually a person is born with certain characteristics that make them sensitive. We also learn to be that way too. It is a valued trait that I wish everyone could have, sadly, that is what is lacking most in our culture today.

If you want to tone down your sensitivity, I suggest you think long and hard about why. Is it because some idiot make a comment about your being too "thin skinned" one day? If so, ignore them. If it is interfering with your life in a certain way that you see is negative, monitor yourself. You can also ask why you are feeling or reacting to something as you do. Go behind the feelings in other words to find out the real reason.

Value who you are!

Answer 3

I used to be very sensitive. I started coming out of it when I had kids and I have gone through a lot for the last several years. So I guess with experience, you start to become less sensitive. I learned to laugh at myself and even laugh when others laugh at me (which is often:) I try not to read into what others are thinking or find hidden meanings in their actions or words. I have to be conscious of it, though. It takes time but remember that most people dont mean to hurt you and a lot of people are insensitive and just dont realize how much they can hurt you.

Answer 4

some people are just more sensitive than others, some babies cry all the time some dont. you will learn coping skills through out life and things wont get you down so much. life is very hard for everyone at some point. learn what makes you happy and don't forget to make yourself happy every day.

Answer 5

I think you learn to not allow things to "bother" you so much. I have a book about The highly sensitive person. I think you get to know yourself better and you can then ask yourself if you are letting things "get to you" when they weren't intentionally supposed to.

You sort of learn to manage things in a better way. Use of CBT technique help. As does learning assertiveness skills.

Answer 6

Realise that other people are entitled to their opinions, but they're not entitled to to push them on you.
Life is too short to worry about what others think.
If you're not hurting anyone, then sod'em, why worry, you'll be a forgotten memory and pushing up daisies quicker than you think, enjoy the now.

Answer 7

It may look like you have thin skin, but in actuality your skin has several layers. The lighter the skin the thinner it looks.

Answer 8

do you mean being a very sensitive person, opposed to someone who is [thick skinned] meaning they are not easily offended,
if you want to have a thicker skin, you need to ignore other peoples critism, not easy, i can be over sensitive to remarks sometimes,

Answer 9

well, if you are born with it, it means it is in the genes of your family and it is genectically runs in your family