Am i allowed to touch or kiss a girl in Christianity?

Question

When i got saved by Christ over 6 weeks ago it totally changed my life for the better. New opportunities have poured in, my life is so much easier and better in quality now. A real blessing.

I understand pre-marital sex is not permitted with the faith, but is holding hands, touching and kissing also included? Or is this not allowed as it is the "lust of the flesh"?

My Pentecostal Church advises that it isn't, and if you go out with a girl you should go in a group to avoid any physical intimacy. Holding hands isn't tolerated. There have been a case where a couple in love only kissed for the first time they were at the wedding altar.

My fear is that in today's modern world, cases like that do not happen. I don't think i could get a girl to marry me without ever really touching me, holding hands to say the least. It feels like a niche for people to be able to get married following those rules.

This is where i find spiritual warfare. What is your take?

Alot of replies says that kissing is okay. However in the bible does it not say (no reference available) that the lips should be for the 'increaseth' of learning, as opposed to lust?

Answer 1

Of course, you can hold hands and kiss. Doesn't the Bible tell us to "Greet each other with a holy kiss"? And, holding of hands was even okay between men until the beginning of the homosexual movement where it became "unseemly" because it might show the wrong kind of "love".
Remember though to always be strong against temptation because there will be temptation to take it a little further. For example, a kiss on the cheek when saying hello or goodbye is not wrong but when you start with the full-on "french" kiss, passions begin to soar so you might stay away from there.
And "touching" is something also to not be taken lightly. Holding hands is touching and is slightly more intimate than the "knuckle-knock" or putting your hand on someone's arm to guide them as they walk up or down stairs or get in/out of a car. Touching anywhere else starts to get into the more intimate areas and should be avoided. Such as touching of the hair. Believe it or not, that is a very intimate touch, similar to touching someone's cheek.
I have heard a pretty good rule of thumb when it comes to dating. Never date someone you wouldn't marry. Keep that in mind.
For now though, it's only been a short time since you gave your life to God. Don't test it with spiritual warfare this soon. Get to know who it is you serve first.
As for finding the one God has designed for you to marry, you can play the field looking for her and run the risks that most young people do. Or you can focus on living in God's will and see if He doesn't bring her to you. (He will)

Answer 2

It's best to go out in a group of friends..Let's say you hold hands hmmm, that's not so bad...then you start hugging hmmmm , that's not so bad well how about a kiss , hmmm that's not so bad etc.... It is lust of the flesh . If your date is in the same faith she will understand..Read Proverbs 15 :3. Forget today's modern world it's apostate .You can serve the Lord better if you are single Read 1 Corinthians 7 , you don't have to get married . I know it sounds weird but , If you can't handle the flesh and lust in your mind then find a girl of the same faith .Amos 3:3 ,2 Corinthians 6:14

Answer 3

OK A SERIOUS ANSWER

As long as you are not groping a persons private parts I do not feel God is against physical affecion. Appropriate touching like hugging, holding hand, and yes kissing is not a sin. You just have to contain and control your emotions so that you don't fall into sin thus having sex without marrige.

I don't want to go against your pentecostal advisor but to get to know a person you are dating you need to get to know that person not the opinions of others. So the group thing is ok but you need to at some point in the relationship be alone with the person so that you can truely know them.

Answer 4

Yes, you can kiss and hold hands. Sex before marriage-that's a no go. So what is sex and where does it begin? I would say where the breasts are-2nd base. Marriage is a sacrament before God so that the union between a MAN and WOMAN can be blessed. Be fruitful and multiply. The two shall become one. A baby is a physical manifestation of a spiritual truth.

Answer 5

I'm Catholic, and a comedian once put the "rules" of the religion very nicely when he said, "If it feels good, stop." The problem with Catholicism is that many of its age-old stipulations are just that - old. They are not realistic with today's society.

In Catholicism, not only is pre-marital sex forbidden, but (technically) you're not allowed to be cremated, get on birth control or even pierce your ears. I've already committed three out of four of those (obviously not being cremated), but I still feel a very close relationship with Jesus Christ. I know He still loves me, and the feeling is quite mutual.

I can't believe I'm sharing this with you, but I haven't been intimate with anyone in three years, and that includes not having sex, kissing, touching, etc. It's not because I don't want to, but because I haven't fallen in love in ages. I'm still waiting to find the next lucky guy, and when he does come, I will most definitely share all of that with him.

A lot of these religious rules were created by man, and in my heart, I don't think God would mind you being close to someone, as long as you genuinely feel for them. Why would He give us all these emotions if we're not allowed to express them? And you're right, it is hard to get emotionally close to someone you're romantically involved in without the physical aspect.

Just be a good person, give God the glory every day, and don't waste the gift of your body on meaningless flings. You'll be OK buddy!

Answer 6

If a person is really serious about their faith/relationship in God then it calls for sacrifice, you can kiss and hold hands without fear of sin but the fact remains that you really need to restrain anything more than this.
Remember you will be tempted by desires of the flesh(the ego/self) and this is sometimes a real battle.

Answer 7

As a muslim, which you might percept as an enemy, I believe that you should listen to your Pentecostal church in terms of this issue. Even i am a disbeliever or a Pagan moon god worshipper as what you xtian love to accuse, still I have the right to speak up when it comes to the issue of morality. My friend, isn't not written in the bible that the body of a human bein is the temple of g-d that contains the spirit of G-d ? please, take care of your flesh that holds G-d's spirit (soul) or divine breath.Please take care of the purity of your body...
Don't fall into sin and abomination..... For satan will be laughing at you If he sees that one of the children of adam are lead astray.....

Answer 8

you can do it, i have a friend who's 22 and doing the same thing. if you're honest with a girl, up front, she will appreciate it. there are a few, depending on your location, who hold the same values. your best bet would be a really conservative church. and the whole ''spiritual warfare'' is just a hype to get you all worked up about being a christian. just live your life, don't fall into other people's traps.

Answer 9

You are new, so I have to take it easy on you.

What is a Christian? Someone who isn't rebellious? Someone who seems perfect to all people?

Isn't the real reason why you are Christian is because you trust God through Jesus Christ to do what He said He would do?

If you think taht you are a Christian BECAUSE you don't have premarital sex, you have a terrible road of looking at yourself ahead of you. Whenever you look at yourself, you might feel depressed. I think that's a good reaction. Because God's standard is perfection, and we ain't it. If we have our eyes on Jesus, we are getting the better view, the right one.

Answer 10

Well the touchin part, I don't knw so much about, I would'nt & the kiss I don't think any thang is wrong there if things stay clean about tha kiss.