I am a teen mother and my daughter is just a baby, the father of the baby hasnt really admitted that he has a child yet and he holds us back from moving up in life, i have to push him to make good decisions and then i have to take care of the baby and i have to take care of me so i started to get some space from him but i dont want to take her father away from her but i dont want her growing up with a bad influence,, He holds me back and with a child i dont think thats any help from the limits i already have in life but he loves her and me im just confused on if i should keep him in our lives..
2007-06-23 19:47:00 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You have to do what's best for you & your child. If her father isn't mature enough to make decisions in the best interest of his baby, then you aren't taking away her father, he is. You are taking away a bad influence or a bad situation. Remember your girl will emulate the relationships you have. Make sure you're in a healthy mutually loving relationship. Meanwhile, she can still have contact with her father and always try to maintain a civil & loving relationship with him. One day he may grow up & learn how to put his daughter's interests first. Maybe he won't, but make sure you do what's best for the two of you. Good luck. I have been there.
2007-06-23 19:53:34 · answer #1 · answered by 2D 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You state that YOU are a teen mother, so am I right in thinking the father is also a teen? If so what do you expect? HE is still a child himself. Neither one of you have any business being parents and I'll bet it wouldn't have happened if you didn't THINK you were grown up and ready to have sex when in fact you were children and irresponsible. So now you're expecting him to grow up and be "a MAN". He isn't going to because he is still a boy. You call HIM a bad influence. And what sort of influence are you? You CHOSE to have sex with a boy and now wonder if you should keep him in your lives? He has the RIGHT to be in his daughter's life. You have no right to keep him from being with his daughter. Obviously YOU haven't grown up as much as you think you have.
2007-06-24 06:46:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you should keep him in her life. She has a right to know her father. What you should do, if he's a problem, is just limit the amount of time you spend with him. Set up times for him to meet up with you... at a park, etc. to hang out for a few hours here and there. Maybe get together with him for a couple of hours once or twice a week. Just keep it friendly and positive and let him bond with her. He should be invited to all birthdays and events related to her as well. He is her Dad. Immature or not. Don't ruin a relationship with his daughter. You'll only be cheating her.
2007-06-24 02:54:10 · answer #3 · answered by Classic Claire 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You ARE confused but I don't blame you,being a single teen mother must be tough. If he is not letting you move up in life, you should hold him at arm's length. No influence will be better than bad influence for your child. And think of yourself too - you have your whole life ahead of you, you must make something out of it. Move on, get ahead.
2007-06-24 02:53:57 · answer #4 · answered by Traveller 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You can keep him in your daughters life and not in yours in that way. It sounds like you need to move on as far as boyfriend/hubby. He doesnt seem grown up and you have to grow up fast having a baby. Its going to be hard enough for you to do this with out him holding you down. You can let him in her life and in fact I would say if he wants to be part of it let him. But, as far as you go I would say run emotionally the other direction so you can find some one strong and more adult to be in your life and help you with everything your going through and will go through because your going to need it.
2007-06-24 04:30:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's a bad influence then it's probably best if you distance your child from him. A father figure is important, sure, but one that will lead your baby down a bad road is not worth it. Perhaps grandpa can fill in.
2007-06-24 02:54:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Move on if you must. Don't ever deny her visits with her father unless she is in harms way. And don't speak bad of the father..EVER. She will respect you for your thought fullness later. And hopefully live by example.
2007-06-27 05:07:34 · answer #7 · answered by celestial dragonfly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u need to choose whats right for yur daughter first the baby comes first then anything else if his bad influence then forget about him and do whats best for yur baby
2007-06-24 02:54:26 · answer #8 · answered by robbie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋