Wiccans/Pagans...What should I tell my Non-Wiccan friend????!!!!?

Question

So here's the problem: My friend knows that I have a Yahoo Answers ID and she just got one too. She keeps asking me what my account name is so she can check out my questions/advice and add me to her contacts list. I keep making dumb excuses, but I can tell she's getting restless and suspicious. She doesn't know I'm Wiccan, and neither do any of my other friends (My family knows, though). My friend isn't really Super-Christian or anything, but I'm not sure how she would handle it if I told her my religion. I definitley don't want to come out of the broom-closet yet, but she's going to know that I'm keeping something from her. Any ideas on what I should tell her, when she asks me for my account name again? I was thinking about maybe getting a second account and only telling her about that one, but it might get too complicated. Please help me! I really don't want to lose a friend over something like this. Open-minded answers are welcome! Thanks for your time, *Tiger-lily Rain*

Answer 1

I know where you're coming from, because I've gone through this kind of thing before. You'll know when you're ready to come out to your friends, but until then, don't let anyone pressure you into doing it. All you really have to do is explain to your friend that you don't give your Yahoo! I.D. out to anyone you know in real life. The reason being that doing so would negate the best part about Y!Answers: being able to ask the types of questions that you would feel uncomfortable asking someone in person. Being aware that people you know in real life are seeing some of your more personal questions could make it very awkward and perhaps cause you to be uncomfortable about asking or saying what you really want to on the site. If you make it about privacy and make sure she knows that you do this with everybody (not just her), then she will probably understand.

Edit:
I've seen so many answers where they are really pressuring you to tell. Some people don't realize that there are places where it isn't smart or safe to come out of the broom closet (because of prejudice, harassment or the like). Once you tell someone, it is likely to get around, whether intentional or accidental. You know what is best for you, so I say trust yourself and don't feel bad about setting boundaries where your privacy is concerned!

Answer 2

I know you asked for Wiccans and pagans to answer your question, so I hope you'll forgive me if I'm overstepping my boundaries here.

I just thought that maybe you'd like to get an "outsider's" view on things. A little background: I was Wiccan from when I was fifteen until I was almost twenty-one. I stopped practicing witchcraft when I was twenty, but I still believed in it to an extent. I studied Wicca for several months before taking that path, too. Now I'm a Christian. I have been for eight months. I was also an atheist at one point, but that's neither here nor there.

Anyway, you just need to tell your friend the truth. If she's a true friend, she'll accept you...AND the path you've chosen. I have friends that are Wiccan, and I also have atheist, agnostic, Buddhist, Hindu, and Muslim friends. If your friend is a REAL friend, it won't make any difference to her which religion you are.

However, it might be a good idea to prepare yourself to answer any questions she might have about Wicca, especially if she's not familiar with it.

You're the one who knows your friend best. If I were you, I would compile a list of questions she might ask, and write out answers to them. Be prepared.

Good luck.

Answer 3

The hardest thing about coming out of the wiccan closet is the reaction of people who are close to you. We all know how most Christians feel about us; that fear of losing relationships knocks the breath out of you everytime you think about it.

My suggestion is be honest and confide in her about your belief. Also explain why you were so tentative about giving her your yahoo ID.

Know this if you loose her as a friend the friendship was not meant to continue. Be understanding that it may take time and tell her that you understand if she is uncomfortable with the friendship.

Remember people come into our lives for a reason that experience may a few weeks or maybe a life time; be thankful for the time that you guys had.

However, she maybe ok with and if she is tell her that you are not comfortable with everybody knowing and if she can keep it herself until you are.

Peace be with you.

Answer 4

Why hide it? I don't dress up and wear pentacles around or anything, but if asked, I'll tell the truth. Be prepared to educate her on what your beliefs are really about. She might be cool with it. She might be TOO cool with it and start nagging you to cast this spell for her and teach her and stuff. You could ask her not to tell anyone else, but we know how secrets can be. Ya know? In the end it's only your business and none of hers. It could become mega-complicated if she knew. Make another account, tell her your old one got deleted cause you asked some question that offended someone and never bring it up again.

Answer 5

I basically had the same happen over being an atheist...she pretty much figured it out when she saw some answers I left to people who were talking ignorant about non believers... And this is a friend I've had for 18 years.

What I did...I kept the original account my friends know for other areas of Y!A, and made this one up for this section specifically; They don't know of this account. That way I do not offend them and I can post reply to people what I want. Basically what you have already considered, and I don't find it complicated.

Answer 6

She's your friend, you know how much information you can trust her with and whether she can keep a secret. I would tell her, but avoid using the words "Wicca," "witch," and "witchcraft" at first, those tend to set off alarm bells in ppl's heads. Explain your beliefs, that it's nature centered, pagan, has **nothing** to do with the devil or satan. If she's a good friend she'll understand.

Answer 7

The next time she askes you for your account name, you should sit her down and tell her what it is and what you do. Don't be ashamed of what you do if she is a true friend than she will be able to look past it and still be your friend. Good Luck.

Answer 8

How about picking a belief system that you can be open and honest about, and not have to hide it from anyone? If you can't be whole and honest in your religion, then maybe you should consider coming out of the shadows and into the light.

Answer 9

Well, either get a different account, make your Q&A private OR if she finds out, don't treat it like it's a big deal....

because it's really not.

Answer 10

If she can't accept you then she's not a good friend. I would suggest telling her your religion so she doesn't have to find out on Y!A then if she accepts you tell her and if she doesn't that's her problem.