I moved to a new city a few months ago and I have been having a really hard time meeting people. It's one of those places where if you smile at somebody, they immediately think you are weird and up to something no good so they treat you like a psycho if you try to be nice. I have been unable to break through to a single person, it's like these people are so settled in their lives that they don't really care if I am in it or not and unwilling to even get to know me. I'm a nice person, laid back with a good sense of humor, and I have been told I am attractive....I'm kind of shy, but I've put myself out there a couple of times trying to get to know people, and it's like they just have no interest in me. I've been really discouraged and feeling really badly. Has anyone else had a similar experience, and does it really get better with time? People back home keep telling me that it will, but I swear I honestly feel worse as time goes on.
2007-06-23 13:30:45 · 16 answers · asked by YoungShyCareerGirl 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To clear up: I'm not in school, I'm an adult. I moved to the city for work. Thanks.
2007-06-23 13:36:36 · update #1
The best way to meet new people is to join a club (gym) if you can afford it. If not maybe the local community has some volunteer opportunities available. You could meet others and by working with them and you will gradually see what they are like and vice versa. One other option is join a church. a lot of them have singles clubs now-a-days, you'd be surprised.
2007-06-23 13:35:01 · answer #1 · answered by ersof59 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember ITS NOT YOU!..and your not a psycho! You will find or perhaps meet people eventually that will be tuned into the way you are. Im not sure what your intrests are but they may be a good start to do your hobbies and fine people that way at least you will have things in common. Of course you perhaps a little home sick and thats natural especially if you have moved to a new area, because is all new!..**hugging you right now**Chin up girl!..well you know where I am..Im your contact and definetely a cyber friend too....Jamie 28yrs x
2007-06-24 11:53:38 · answer #2 · answered by Jamie79 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shy,
Find yourself a few hours a week where you do some volunteer/community work. It does not have to be much, just a few hours and see what kind of people you meet. Generally, the people in the volunteer programs are good people. They may, at least, be able to steer you towards some other places/people of similar interest. Keep smiling.
Yours, Duke
2007-06-24 17:44:24 · answer #3 · answered by Duke 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ive had the same experience..only i moved from a big city to the middle of nowhere..where everyone is aldready settled in with thier friends
all you gotta do is get out more...explore more places
just because a few people dont like you doesnt mean you should get down on yourself
theres going to be a lot of peple you will run into in life that wont like you
but just keep ur head up and keep exploring new places
2007-06-23 20:35:28 · answer #4 · answered by M<3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try getting involved in some new community organizations. That will help a lot because you'll meet people who have similar values and a similar passion for doing good in the world.
People are crazy sometimes. I'd want to get to know you, if we were in the same place.
2007-06-23 20:44:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could help you but I live in a city where most of the people are friendly. I've been told it is due to the lithium (an antidepressant) that naturally occurs in the water. Some lithium added to the water cooler might help.
2007-06-24 16:11:22 · answer #6 · answered by Amphibolite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Shy:
Knowing no one in a strange city is no fun at all. Ever go to church? Find a Methodist Church in your area and attend for a Sunday or two. Folks there will be open and welcoming. If I knew the city, there might be other suggestions.
2007-06-23 21:19:02 · answer #7 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most important thing is to keep being you. Keep waving and smiling. Keep trying and keep reaching out to new people. These people are just take a while to warm up to you. Give them time to get to know you. Maybe have a neighborhood BBQ and bring people together. I promise things will get better. Good luck!
2007-06-23 20:36:33 · answer #8 · answered by huhyftcgbjhu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to be just like that, got out of the service and all my friends moved on. I just sat on my *** and thought that I am god's lonely man. But then I just stopped caring, got out, talked to people, got a job and hang out with co-workers and became friends with their friends. Hang out at a local coffee shop and chat with anyone who is also a regular.
Just need to be there man, live life. Don't worry if you don't have friends now. As long as you're out and about you'll get friends.
Also get fit, just because its good for you. Good luck.
2007-06-23 20:37:35 · answer #9 · answered by Leon Clemens 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might take some time. What city are you in? Try taking a fun course somewhere so you have something in common with them. Perhaps a cooking course or a craft course.
2007-06-23 20:36:34 · answer #10 · answered by Deb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋