I need STRONG (without sugaring) advice to help me get going with women...?

Question

I'm 17. Never had a date, nor a girlfriend. I rarely even communicate with women in general. I know that I have to get out of this habit but everytime I consider doing it I fall back to old habits (being a recluse, etc). I need to break out of this, but I don't know how to do it. I won't even try, that's the problem. I fall back and say "what's the use?" before doing anything.

I need some help!

Answer 1

THATS PERFECTLY NORMAL.

"whats the use"??

CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE THIS VERY MINUTE.
(notice that I am not "sugaring" because you asked)

Instead of ASKING yourself . . "what's the use" . . . and not having an answer, TELL yourself that when a woman doesn't respond to you . . . IT JUST DOESN"T MATTER.

-->> UNTIL SHE "MEANS" SOMETHING TO YOU . . . she means NOTHING to you. If you keep this at the back of your mind, then HER REJECTION will mean NOTHING to you TOO!!!

Do you understand the VALUE of that statement??

You are 17. And I am telling you . . . after 23 years of experience since I was 17, having a TOTALLY detached attitude about women who DONT respond means I dont CARE if a woman doesn't respond, and I will CERTAINLY NOT beat myself up about it because it has NOTHING TO DO WITH --> ME.

"Whats the use" . . . in CARING about how a woman (you dont even KNOW yet ) responds to you??? Now THATS the question you should be asking.

This makes walking up to ANY women. . . totally inconsiquential EVERY SINGLE TIME. Even if she is a dead KNOCK-OUT . . . who cares. It's not her LOOKS that will KEEP you interested in her . . that's for sure. And it removes any MENTAL block (which only exists in your HEAD anyway) altogether.

Interesting that you used the term "fall back". If you wil permit me to say so . . . thats a COWARDS attitude. And its NOT ATTRACTIVE.

If you WANT TO WIN ANY BATTLE IN YOUR LIFE . . . dont even THINK about "falling back". You will NEVER win that way. In career . . . promotion . . .and ALL aspects of your life.. . . especially women.

If you WANT to be SUCCESSFUL in LIFE and with women, you must PROJECT NO REMOTE INTENT OF "FALLING BACK" UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES.

If you are the type to "cave" . . . everyone will know it, and you will NEVER be rewarded for it.

Cheers.

:)

Answer 2

Take your age into perspective, its natural to be confused as to what to do to socialize. And like most kids, you are expecting instant changes when you do something, and don't stick with it long enough to actualize those changes.

You said you wanted advice straight up, so here it is. Stop concentrating on yourself and get out and do something for someone else. Pick a charity or an interest and throw yourself into it. You will not only occupy the time you spend now thinking about yourself, but you will find yourself with like minded people. That will give you something to talk about, and talking about shared interest is the key to starting any conversation. Relationships start with conversation.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Okay. You really just need to buck up. If you look good, you feel good. Dress up a little. Do your hair differently. Y'know? Make yourself feel attractive before you can act attractive. Then just say hi. Introduce yourself, get to know her. You don't sound like you're out to bone a girl on the first hour, so it should be a piece of cake! Ask her what she's doing on a given night or find something she's interested in or passionate about (i.e. a sport or particular art form or subject) and appeal to it. If you need any more help, just e-mail me! Good luck!

Answer 4

Okay, first and foremost you have to put yourself in a comfortable situation. If you aren't the school jock, then don't go after the girls who go after school jocks. If you like, i don't know, science, then go to science functions.

Once you are in a setting where you are relaxed and can be yourself, then you can start to loosen up and talk to girls.

Next-don't jump straight to trying to date someone. Get to know her first. The first conversations are always the most awkward and uncomfortable so think of different things you can talk about in advance. Also, during the conversation try to find a common interest and talk about that. Radiate confidence about what you talk about, but not *********. Just be assured of your words and actions.

If you still want to get to know her better, say something along the lines of "I really want to get to know you better, would you like to get coffee sometime?" Its a casual get-together that is in the grey area of friendly meeting and date. If that goes well do not be afraid to ask her out to dinner or a movie while you are having coffee. "I'm a little hungry, want to grab a bite to eat?"

Again, the initial part is the hardest to overcome at first. Rejection certainly isn't fun but its definitely survivable. In a few years you'll realize that there are literally billions of women out there, if one of them isnt interested, forget her, she isnt worth your time.

Answer 5

Get involved in something at school. Its the easiest way to be thrown into various social circles. Plus, the exposure you'll get from the girls there will prepare/ease you for dating.

Also, the best way to break a bad habit is to call it out. Don't try to hide it or run from it.. stop dead in your tracks and say I don't like this and I'm going to change it. Make a plan!

Answer 6

I understand your problem & that's because I was once U !
I won't give an advice for that won't help cause those things never helped ME ! Only I can tell how I changed !
There was dis girl in my college who's always inquisitive about me & always wanted to talk 2 me ! And I always used to give singular replies !
Oneday, I found she had stopped questioning & that's when the nail hit me on the head ! I suffered the neglegience for 2 months & then to the greatest surprise & satisfaction; proposed ! She accepted !

Answer 7

Why not correct your mind, choose girl as normal friend in first place, so that will know if she really suit u, for a certain period, u can decide if u really want her to be your girlfriend!!!
it is alright if girl turn you down, at least u ever try!!!!
If u determined to get a wife, this is the right process u got to follow!!! But sometime, a girl probably has more suitors, this is the danger part in chasing.....u got to show your best...
good luck!!!

Answer 8

In order to date girls youve got to meet girls. Get yourself out there advertise. Start joking with them or at least go up to a girl you like and just ask for her phone number. But you wont get anywhere if your to afraid to try. Do you know how many girls I could have dated in high school if I just asked ? well I dont either my point isunless your horribly ugly you can get a girl pick one your confident will say yes then go from there just ask someone. I have actually asked out 10 girls in 1 day I didnt stop untill I got a yes trust me someone somewhere will ultimatly **** you. You better hurry up out of this awkward stage or else it will be 10 fold in college good luck

Answer 9

Start with people your own age and simple conversation about topics of mutual interest, such as school or similar activities or events. Don't try to get a date the first time out, just work on developing friends.
You will do fine...

~

Answer 10

Make sure you look good all the time(and smell good).
And just ask out a girl that you like. Whats the worst that could happen. If you don't do anything, you'll never have a date! And trust me, no woman will ask a guy out. You have to do it if you want it.