Mom doesnt love me.?! My brother is part of this too.?

Question

If i change my hair color shes always saying *why can't u be yourself?* or change my style...mind anything i change. I like change. I change my room 2 a month (like move the bed and dresser.) She can't give me 10$ for the movie but gives my 27 year old brother 500$ for his rent at his own appartment. She bought him all his stuff for his appartment....and my sister always uses the car...read this...
Me-Marianne should really get a car
Mom-this doesn't affect u.
Me-Yes...we we're suppose to go but Marianne get's UR CAR
Mom- thats it its MY CAR don't tell me how to run my life
((marianne=sister)). Shes always telling me to calm down and stop acting weird when im with my friends..and thats the real me...i can't be *me* without her critizing me. This is what i always tell my friends.
Could she act like she cares for one moment.
my dad is the best...but he travels..and when he's not here..i'm so left our between my mom,
Mom-52 divorsed 1 time 5 kids. Sister-26 1 kid. Me-13 0 kids.

My parents are together my sister and 2 out of 3 bothers arnt

i might not get alonge with my bro all the time but he's not dead beat...he's phenom

Answer 1

Keep a journal. Write down all of your feelings. When you have enough pages and episodes documented, casually leave it somewhere that she'll find it. When she reads your feelings, she may act differently.

Answer 2

well see here's the problem your mother is old and getting older ..... lol I dated someone in the same situation as you and it was a pain in the butt. See as people get older the get used to things being certain ways and they change. when I was 13 my mother was very understanding, caring, and loving. Although she is still the same way she still loves me she is differen't. It's no longer her job to take care of a child or a teenager maybe on the weekends if your childrens kids come to visit but as you get older it's not your job to take care of them like you would when they get older. I would die if my mother was this way when I was 13 I thank god I live on my own. I dated a girl for almost a year a while back who was in the same situation. he mother had already raised two kids who were then on there own and living there own life and her mother was very my way is the right way and do question me. Wait till you start dating and she says you can go out with some guy and then she changes her mind after you two are already out that's always fun. But she does love you and will do anything for you but yeah have to understand she's getting older. Hope I helped

Answer 3

some parents just dont understand some parents are mean and some just have a past which cause them to act the way that they do like my mom when i lost my virginity she totally start treating me so bad and im 18 she wouldnt talk to me or anything and u say that your only 13 maybe what you should do is get your mom ,dad and you of course to all sit down and talk and tell her how you fell if this doesnt work you are own and because if she keeps putting you down that could effect you in the long run and make you insecure about yourself but on the bright side when you get older and make something out of yourself never look back

Answer 4

I have 8 brithers and sister. One of my older sisters gets ALOT of attencion noe cause she lives in her own. We are never equally treated. This might be a dumb idea right now, but why don't you offer everyone to go on a vacation somewhere? It might bring you together some more. I know how you feel. I honestly do. I'm 12 years old. If you die your hair and your mom doesn't like, all that matters is that YOU like it. Your mom is going through a hard time. It's hard having 5 kids and being divorced. I know I don't want to sound like Barney, but tell her how you feel. Just try to make her listen.

I really hope it works out! GOOD LUCK!

Answer 5

Your mom is screwing up by giving your brother 500 for rent.She needs to MAKE him stand on his own 2 feet.Then she needs to get you and your sister a jobs so you can buy your own car.Im glad you have no kids at 13 hon.It'd be sad if you did.You think you have it hard now, just throw a baby in there, then you'd know strife hon. You wont even be getting a learner's permit for another 2 yrs so you really do not need a car.Your parents can take you where you need to go and your dad bless his heart, although he is earning money to support you all, he needs to be at home more.

Answer 6

Your mother isn't trying to be unfair. She loves all her children and probably feels she needs to help the older ones. Living on your own is very hard. You are only 13 now, but you should decide that you can be independent (unlike your siblings) by studying hard, staying in school, and going to college. (Money is not a factor - go on financial aid if you have to). Your mom and dad will be so proud of you. Perhaps they see that in you and that's why they do less for you. I guess I'm trying to tell you to think positive.

Forget the insults, remember the praise. I'm in a similar family and as I grew older, I realized that my mom loves me very much and knew that I was the one who could make it on my own - that's why she has helped me less financially. Guess what? I'm better off than all my brothers and sisters. She was right.

Answer 7

I felt the same way at 13.

This is a difficult time in your family life. You're growing, changing, exploring your world, and, to you, it seems like your mom is always complaining or not understanding or has a double standard.

My mom and I had our moments throughout my teenaged period. As for my dad ... don't go there.

Now, we have a good, loving relationship. It's hard, but you need to understand that your mom really does love you.

See, I'm a mom now, and moms love their kids to bits and pieces. I guarantee you that your mom loves you and will always love you. It's just hard for you to see from where you're standing.

Advice:
Just do your thing (as long as everything's legal). You and your mom will have more arguments than you can count, but that's what she signed up for, and that's just what happens in every normal mother-daughter relationship.

As for me, I'm going to enjoy this easy time with my kids (girls, 3 and 5). I tell myself that I won't do the same things my mom did (and everyone's mom did), but chances are that I will.

Take care.

Answer 8

I'm sorry that you're feeling unloved. I'm sure your mother loves you with all of her heart but sometimes we get caught up with day-to-day living that we often don't take the time out to say it. You're 13 and your "rights" will open up for you with age. I'm 30 years old and I don't feel like I'm being treated fairly by others around me. It doesn't mean they don't love me, though. I'm sure if you sit down with your mother and have an "adult" discussion about how you're feeling maybe she'll be able to explain why she does what she does. It never hurts!! Hang in there.

Answer 9

Actually it sounds like she does love you ... you are just not hearing the love come through. She loves you the way you are, you want to change the way you are (hair color, for example); she wants you to be financially responsible (that's a good thing) not like your dead-beat brother; she wants you to act real not emo or all drama-queen around your friends ... the fact is, she loves you in a hundred ways, she just hates when you want to do something dumb. Love isn't accepting and approving of everything you do; love is understanding who you are and loving who you really are ... does that make sense?

Answer 10

Your mom loves you. She does care. Did you ever stop and think that maybe its just the opposite of what u think? Shes not trying to ruin your life-she doesnt hate you. And maybe she keeps telling you to be yourself because she wants you to be happy as well. Sounds to me like it could just be a miscommunication. Try telling you mom how you feel. It will help. She will never know til you tell her.